Continuing my ongoing slog through a backlog of Resident Evil titles, I recently played through, and completed the main campaign of, Resident Evil: Revelations 2 (Capcom, 2015) on Xbox One. After struggling a bit with some aspects of the first game, I had hoped to be more comfortable going into Revelations 2 but Capcom made a few changes that make this title almost unrecognisable from its predecessor. Firstly, unlike its predecessor, Revelations 2 was released for main consoles right from the start, rather than being a HD port of a Nintendo 3DS game. However, rather than being a complete package, this title was released in episodes, presumably to encourage players to become immersed in its storyline; whether this actually worked or not is beyond me as I played the Xbox One version, which contains the entire game on one disc.
Never has a skill tree been more unnecessary…
Revelations 2 brings Barry Burton and Claire Redfield back to the franchise; like the first game, each is lumbered with a new character who acts as their partner as they fight to escape from an island that is crawling with infected monstrosities. Claire, partnered with Barry’s daughter Moira, attempts to find her way off the island while Barry, teaming up with Natalia, a young girl suffering from amnesia, arrives at the island some six months later in search of his daughter. Like many of the Resident Evil titles released around this time, Revelations 2 plays from a third-person, over-the-shoulder perspective; as in its predecessor, players have complete freedom of movement, can shoot and reload while moving, and can use healing items at the touch of a button. Well, not quite a touch; this time, players must hold down the R trigger to use these items rather than simply pressing one button. This mechanic is directly tied into the game’s unnecessary and largely pointless skill tree; completing each of the game’s chapters and meeting certain objectives earns the player with BP, which can be spent upgrading certain skills, such as how long it takes to use a herb, how effective they are, and other actions tied in to combat and the player’s partner.
Natalia will point at enemies…it’s super useful…
Unlike in Resident Evil: Revelations (ibid, 2012), players can switch between the two team-mates and even play the game with a friend in co-op mode. Unfortunately, whether you’re partnered with Moira or with Natalia, you’ll find the partners to be next to useless. Neither of them can use firearms; Moira can blind and stun enemies with a torch and bash them with a crowbar while Natalia can sneak around unnoticed and throw bricks at zombies. One of the things I disliked about the first game was the “Genesis” device that forced me to constantly scan enemies and the environment for resources. A similar function exists here, unfortunately, as players can only find hidden items with Moira’s torch or Natalia’s convenient “sixth sense”, which means that you’ll have to jump back and forth between your two characters to find everything in each area. While the first game featured some unique enemy designs tied directly to its water-based environment, Revelations 2 opts for the more traditional zombie-like enemies and mutated creatures favoured by the series after Resident Evil 4(Capcom Production Studio 4, 2005). The major difference here, though, is that these creatures appear to be made of sponge; they will soak up your bullets and still keep coming and some of the larger and more violent enemies may require other tactics to get around.
Seriously, fuck this fucking thing!
Barry, for example, can sneak up on enemies and dispatch them in one move but the Glasp, for example, is invisible, requiring players to switch to Natalia and point out and target the creature so Barry can kill it, which is extremely frustrating when involved in combat. In fact, too many of the game’s enemies have instant kill moves; the reoccurring and extremely annoying bullet-sponge first encountered in the junkyard will have you tearing your hair out as you struggle to hit its weak point and avoid its insta-kill move. Once again, players can use Part Boxes to upgrade their weapons; the game’s extensive (and yet restrictive) crafting system also allows players to craft explosive bottles and helpful items to stop bleeding and wipe away gunk, two new status effects that really add to the game’s frustrations. Personally, I found myself loading tourniquets, wipes, and healing items on the partner character, who will automatically use them when you get stuck in a bind.
This bitch has plans, man…lots of plans!
The game’s narrative is pretty engaging; across four chapters, you’ll attempt to escape from a dire situation and uncover the fate of the characters. In true Resident Evil fashion, though, the plot is far from simple; while it doesn’t jump around as many different places and points in time as its predecessor, it can still be confusing trying to figure out what the mysterious Overseer is up to and uncover the mystery behind the island. On top of that, the game has two potential endings depending on how you deal with the now-traditional “huge tentacle mutating creature” boss battle. This (and the different medals available in each chapter, hidden emblems, and the Achievements) may entice players to revisit chapters from the story once again but, honestly, each chapter is so long that playing casually is not as easy as it was in the first game. Revelations 2 also features a couple of other game modes; Raid Mode returns, this time as a kind of virtual reality simulation that allows players to play as some classic Resident Evil characters in settings that closely resemble those of older games and battle swarms of enemies. Additional side stories also flesh out the main campaign; “Little Miss” sees players control Natalia and her dark doppelganger, sneaking past monsters in an effort to find her bear, while “The Struggle” sees Moira having to hunt animals to survive and clear previous areas of enemies to stay alive.
This bastard alone is enough to convince me to put this game down.
I wasn’t massively blown away by Resident Evil: Revelations; it was a bit awkward in places, the story was all over the place, and the enemies were way too aggressive and annoying. A lot of this is the same here; for everything Revelations 2 does better (graphically the game is superior and the locations are a lot easier to navigate; the story is arguably more engaging as well, if a lot more confusing), it also suffers from some of the same drawbacks as well as some all new ones. Forcing players to switch to their partner, who is as good as dead against many of the game’s monstrous enemies, just to solve puzzles, find items, and get through areas is tedious and annoying; the chapters are also too long, making repeated playthroughs a bit of a slog, and any game that makes a regular mid-level boss more difficult than the final boss is one that irks me, especially when this enemy constantly keeps showing back up and can easily one-shot you no matter how well you’re playing.
For me, the Console Wars extended well past the 16-bit era of videogaming. Unlike a lot of my friends, I did not have the income to justify doubling down so, while they were all off playing PlayStation and PlayStation 2 while alsoa playing Nintendo 64, I stuck with the Nintendo 64 and GameCube since SEGA were no longer in the business of making consoles. As previously detailed, this means that I didn’t have much exposure to Resident Evil (Capcom, 1996 to present) apart from the Nintendo 64 port of Resident Evil 2 (ibid/Rockstar San Diego/Factor 5, 1999). Although I enjoyed the GameCube remake (Capcom, 2002) and Resident Evil Zero (ibid), I yearned for the chance to take up arms as Leon S. Kennedy once again. Resident Evil 4(Capcom Production Studio 4, 2005) changed that while simultaneously changing the franchise significantly. Slowly, as Capcom released more and more titles with newer control schemes and gameplay mechanics, Resident Evil shifted away from being a survival-horror series, where supplies were limited and caution was the preferred choice, and became far more action-orientated. Resident Evil 4 laid the groundwork for this, moving the camera behind Leon’s shoulder and allowing full 360-degree movement, and changed the franchise’s focus away from zombies and the machinations of Umbrella and more towards parasites and mutations.
Gone are the days of collecting medieval-themed keys.
Staying the course, Resident Evil 5 (Capcom, 2009) took these aspects and ramped them up to eleven. Returning Chris Redfield to the series, Resident Evil 5 dropped players into a complex plot revolving around Albert Wesker’s attempts to destroy the human race with the Oroburos virus. Teamed with Sheva Alomar, Chris finds himself on a path towards not just saving the human race but also of vengeance; prior to the game’s events, Redfield’s partner, Jill Valentine, was presumed dead at Wesker’s hands and Chris, having bulked up to stand a better chance against Wesker’s superhuman abilities, is determined to have his revenge.
Think of Sheva as a walking Item Box…
Unlike Leon, who was lumbered with protecting and rescuing Ashley Graham in Resident Evil 4, Chris and Sheva operate as a unit. Two players (or one with the CPU) can progress side-by-side throughout the main campaign; Chris and Sheva each have their own limited inventory slots meaning that, with no Item Boxes present in the game, trading and combining items is essential to survival, similar to the partner system of Resident Evil Zero. Ideally, you’ll want to play Resident Evil 5 with a friend as the CPU is extremely basic; your partner will shoot at enemies, pass you ammo, and heal or resuscitate you when necessary but is just as likely to be found stuck behind objects or running against a wall. They also seem incapable of using any weapon other than the one assigned to the top of their inventory, meaning you’ll probably end up using them as a walking, talking storage system.
Use your hard-earned gold to buy and upgrade weapons.
Supplies are plentiful, however, even more so than in Resident Evil 4; dispatched enemies will often drop herbs, ammo, gold, or other trinkets while breakable pots, chests, and other objects will yield similar provisions. Other treasures can also be located throughout the story and can be sold at the end of each chapter to purchase new weapons; while it is sad to see the Merchant absent from the title, this does make inventory management a lot simpler and easier. In terms of gameplay, the control scheme of Resident Evil 4 remains intact here, with some additions; at certain points, the player must command their partner to pull levers, open doors, or otherwise assist with various, simple puzzles. Quick-time events still pepper certain cutscenes, meaning you have to remain on your toes the entire time whilst playing, which adds a nice level of spice and interaction to otherwise passive gameplay moments.
It’s safe to say that Wesker’s lacking calm in this entry.
The enemies in Resident Evil 5 are many, varied, and plentiful; the first mission alone sees Chris and Sheva swarmed with a seemingly endless horde of Majini and the number of enemies onscreen at any one time is easily double that seen in its predecessor. Beyond the regular zombie-like enemies, players will also face the hulking Executioner, spear and shield wielding foes, the return of the Lickers and chainsaw Majinis, and even a gigantic troll-like creature. The ultimate confrontation comes against Wesker, who faces the player at first largely unarmed except for his superhuman abilities and, ultimately, in a mutated form that closely resembles that of a Tyrant. Beyond the main campaign, players can also take part in the Mercenaries mode (where they must eliminate as many enemies as possible within a strict time limit) and a Versus mode (where players take part in online battles as part of one of two factions) . The story is further fleshed out in two DLC campaigns, ‘Lost in Nightmares’ and ‘Desperate Escape’, which sees players once again back in control of Jill Valentine.
Resident Evil 5 is very enjoyable when playing with a friend.
When I first played Resident Evil 5, I remember being quite underwhelmed and disappointed; I had enjoyed Resident Evil 4 quite a lot, despite the hindrance of Ashley’s dead-weight, and it felt as though something had been lost in trying to do more and more. I don’t really mind the added emphasis on action or co-op as it makes the game a breeze to play; checkpoints and autosave locations are plentiful, meaning you can get a good feel of how to progress past more difficult sections and the freedom of movement is unparalleled. Since playing the HD remake on Xbox One, though, I have found that the title is a lot more fun and interesting than I previously believed. Admittedly, a great deal of my enjoyment has come from playing online co-op with a friend of mine but, even when playing alone, I have found myself returning to the game’s campaign, earning Achievements, stocking up my inventory, and earning more BP to spend on costumes, figurines, and upgrades for my weapons.
Relish the opportunity to wipe that smug smirk off Wesker’s face.
All-in-all, Resident Evil 5 is a great action-horror title; it is not the classic Resident Evil formula but, should you wish to play a game that is, there are plenty of previous titles that are readily accessible. I think the game may have gotten a bad reputation back in the day for straying so far from the survival-horror genre but, now, with the benefit of hindsight and subsequent titles, I can appreciate the faster pace of the title and Capcom’s attempts to keep the franchise relevant in a difficult market.
How powerful is nostalgia? That is the question Yooka-Laylee (Playtonic Games/Team17, 2017) poses. The spiritual successor to one of the greatest 3D platrformers/collect-a-thons ever, and one of my personal favourite videogames, Banjo-Kazooie(Rare, 1998), Yooka-Laylee once again throws players into a vibrant world full of colourful, squawking characters but, released some twenty years after Banjo’s heyday, is it enough to satisfy modern gamers? Obviously, this is a question many have debated and answered long before I got around to playing Yooka-Laylee and, if you listen to those opinions, you’ll largely hear a sense of apathy, disappointment, and frustrating with some of Yooka-Laylee’s design choices and gameplay mechanics. It amuses me, however, to imagine the same people who criticised Yooka-Laylee’s gameplay are probably some of the same people who were disappointed that Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts (ibid, 2008) was just a kart-constructor and not a fully-fledged 3D platformer. But then, as I’ve always said, you can’t please everyone. Luckily, my needs are far simpler: all I wanted was a throwback to all the things I loved about the Banjo games on modern consoles and, in that sense, Yooka-Laylee delivered.
Yooka and Laylee must search high and low for their missing Pagies.
Rather than the classic bird and bird duo of yesteryear, Yooka-Laylee sees players taking control of the titular Yooka (a green lizard capable of rolling, attacking with his tail, and spitting fire, ice, and grenades) and Laylee (a purple bat who allows a degree of flight and whose sonar highlights secrets and acts as a protective shield) who must fight against the minions of the nefarious Capital B, who plans to use a magical book to take control of the world. Yooka and Laylee happen to be in possession of the book and, when its pages are scattered across various worlds, they take it upon themselves to journey far and wide to collect the missing Pagies and put an end to Capital B’s plans. The world of Yooka-Laylee is both familiar and new; boosted by the power of modern consoles, Yooka and Laylee are able to traverse diverse worlds that are tall, deep, and wide, with numerous side quests, hidden treasures, and additional content that keeps them busy. Worlds are accessed from the game’s central hub, Hivory Towers: Yooka and Laylee can jump into Grand Tomes and enter any of the game’s five worlds, each with a familiar theme (ice, space, casino, etc).
Yooka-Laylee‘s worlds have many hidden secrets.
Once they have collected a certain number of Pagies, players have the option of using some of their Pagies to expand each world, opening up new areas and, in some cases, adding entirely new sections to existing worlds where more collectables can be found. In order to reach Capital B, players have to collect a set number of Pagies but, in order to complete the game fully, players must find all 145 Pagies, each of which is protected by either a boss battle, a puzzle of some sorts, mandatory on-rails kart sections, races, and retro-style arcade games. Players can also find and collect various other objects; Quills can be collected to purchase new moves from Trowzer, a shady sales-snake (and finding all 1010 is necessary to obtaining every Pagie), Power Extenders extend your power meter and allow you to use the duos abilities for longer, butterflies can be eaten to restore health and your power meter and there are Health Extenders to get an extra hit point, and five hidden pieces of pirate treasure are also hidden within each world.
You can purchase new moves and abilities.
To assist with their exploring and collecting, players can access a wide variety of moves upon their purchase. Eventually, players will be able to fly, turn invisible, absorb the properties of beehives to access new areas (eating fire-flies to light dark areas, for example), and even encase themselves in a bubble to walk underwater. Completing certain objective will also allow players to assign one of Vendi’s tonics, which all grant the duo certain buffs (such as an extra hit point, a faster regenerating power meter, or removing damage from falls).
A variety of wacky transformations are at your disposal.
Furthermore, Dr. Puzz can be found in each world and will transform Yooka and Laylee into a variety of other forms, similar to Mumbo-Jumbo in Banjo-Kazooie. Players can become a plant, a snowplough, a helicopter, a swarm of piranha, and an adorable little pirate ship; each transformation allows players to solve puzzles and earn new Pagies as well as access other areas of their respective world. Yooka and Laylee also have to contend with a boss battle in each world, each more ridiculous than the last (they range from a giant ice block and a lovesick, anthropomorphic asteroid). While most of these aren’t particularly difficult and can be bested with a combination of skill, memorisation, and having enough health and power, some can be quite tricky and frustrating, with the final boss battle in particular proving quite the headache. Similar to the final confrontations with Gruntilda in the Banjo games, Capital B takes numerous forms and requires the uses of all of Yooka and Laylee’s skills to win the day.
Even Shovel Knight shows up. How indy is that!?
One of the criticisms I heard about this game long before finally getting it was that the worlds are perhaps too large and too sparsely populated and, in truth, it feels like there could have been ten very distinct worlds instead of five that are extended further and basically force the player to remain in each one for extended periods of time with little reprieve. However, each world is alive with gorgeous, colourful characters and locations; they stretch far up, deep down, and right across and each one has so much to see, do, and explore. The downside to this is that there is so much ground to cover and so many areas and sub areas in each world that it can be difficult to know where to go, where things are, and how to proceed. This is a good thing, in that the game doesn’t hand-hold the player, but it does make finding the game’s many collectables (especially those damn Quills) very difficult and frustrating, especially when you have searched every square inch numerous times. However, each world has a lot packed into it and their own unique theme; players will find themselves completing a variety of mini games in capital Cashino, for instance, in exchange for coins that can be further exchanged for Pagies but, in Moodymaze Marsh, have to traverse a murky swamp filled with spiked plants.
Seriously, screw this guy and his damn kart sections!
Playing Yooka-Laylee is, mostly, a breeze; Pagies can be found and collected without too much difficulty but, if you want to get everything in the game, you’re going to have to endure some frustrating sections. Kartos, the anthropomorphic kart, can be found in each world and beating one of his increasingly-difficult on-rails kart sections is mandatory for earning all Pagies. Similarly, Rextro the Dinosaur’s arcade-style mini games must be beaten twice to earn two Pagies; these are nice, fun distractions but can be annoying to have to play due to the controls, janky hit boxes, and equally-janky controls. It’s nothing you can’t get through with time and patience, though, and adds some variety, if nothing else.
There’s lots to see, do, and collect. What more could you want?
Honestly, it annoys me that Yooka-Laylee wasn’t more praised upon its release. Sure, there could be a lot more available in the game, but for a crowd-funded, independently-produced title, it has a lot going for it and is more than a worthy successor to Banjo-Kazooie. I would love to see the Platronics guys get folded back in to Rare and a true Banjo-Kazooie sequel be produced but, until then, Yooka-Laylee scratches that particular itch quite nicely with its large worlds, gorgeous visuals, fun gameplay, biting wit, and some brilliant new tunes from Grant Kirkhope. In the end, nostalgia was powerful indeed, certainly enough for me to have a great time with this fun little throwback to an era sadly neglected in modern day videogames.
Despite my affinity for the Resident Evil (Capcom, 1996 to present) franchise, my love for the series actually began with the Nintendo 64 port of Resident Evil 2 (ibid/Rockstar San Diego/Factor 5, 1999) because, as a kid, I was too poor to ever own a PlayStation and hedged my bets on the N64 instead. While this means I had to retroactively catch up with the original title and was forced to play catch-up ever since with each subsequent release, I have attempted to keep the series at the forefront of my videogame library. However, considering I prefer to stick to the main series titles, Resident Evil: Revelations (Capcom, 2012) passed me by. Originally released for the Nintendo 3DS, a HD port of the title was released for Xbox One in 2013 and, fresh off of Christmas, a copy of this version recently landed in my lap. Set between Resident Evil 4 (Capcom Production Studio 4, 2005) and Resident Evil 5(Capcom, 2009), Revelations took main series stars Jill Valentine and Chris Redfield, saddled them with new partners, and dropped them in the deepest of shits on two cruise ships.
Revelations jumps back and forth between many characters.
The story, in true Resident Evil fashion, is both complex and simple: a viral outbreak has occurred on the Queen Zenobia and Jill and Parker Luciani have been sent in to investigate and find Chris and his partner, Jessica Sherawat. Things quickly become far more complicated when the terrorist organisation Veltro seemingly re-emerges, monsters and mutations stalk the corridors and extravagant interiors of the Zenobia, and twists, turns, and betrayals start to take shape. Additionally, the story jumps between three teams of two characters (the two already mentioned and a couple of BSAA hot-heads conducting a further investigation) and various different time points; players will take Jill through the Zenobia at one moment, before flashing back to events prior to the game’s story and taking control of Parker, before jumping into Chris’s shoes at another end of the ship. It all gets very confusing and annoying, especially when you’re trying to put the narrative in some kind of order, but I appreciated the variety in characters, who all play slightly different and have different missions, weapons, and enemies to encounter. Revelations adopts the over-the-shoulder, action-orientated approach popularised by Resident Evil 4 and yet still returns the series to its claustrophobic, atmospheric roots through the effective use of narrow hallways and the isolation offered by the ships being adrift in the middle of the ocean. Therefore, weapons, ammo, and health are in plentiful supply (especially by Resident Evil standards) but you still can’t go in all guns blazing.
Revelations’ enemies are as unique as they are dangerous.
The Queen Zenobia is swarming with monsters the likes of which have never been seen before in Resident Evil; as with all titles after Resident Evil 4, Revelations moves away from the traditional shambling zombies and more towards mutations and monstrosities. Given the naval setting of the videogame, Revelations sees players battling against weird aquatic creatures that sprout tentacles at a moment’s notice or throw spear-like claws at you, bulbous atrocities with fuckin’ buzzsaws for hands, and even a gigantic, mutated octopus.
The scanning mechanic was quite obtrusive.
The enemy design is very unique and makes for far more formidable monsters to fight to the point where even bog-standard enemies will soak up your bullets like a sponge. Luckily, players are equipped with a device called the “Genesis” which allows them to scan enemies and the environment to locate hidden items and build up a percentage score; once this hits 100%, you are awarded with a health item. Unfortunately, this device is cumbersome and you cannot attack while using it; I assume it worked a lot better with the 3DS’ touch-pad capabilities but, on the Xbox One, it reminded me of the scanning mechanics that I remember dragging down Ghostbusters: The Video Game (Terminal Reality, 2009). On the plus side, though, player control has never been better or more fluid; in Revelations, players can move and shoot (or reload) at the same time and healing items can be used at the push of a button without equipping them from a menu screen (in fact, I hardly ever had a need for the menu at all!), making combat much faster, easier, and fluid. The map is pretty poor, especially compared to the one in Resident Evil 5, and it’s pretty easy to get lost on the ship’s many floors and increasingly grandiose locations but, to be fair, that is part of the charm of a Resident Evil title.
Whoever designed these swimming sections needs to be shot!
There are also a couple of fun on-rails sections where players use Gatling Guns to blast at giant tentacles and even bigger bosses. One new feature I did not enjoy, however, were the sections that force you to endure the game’s terrible swimming mechanics. I can only assume that this was originally something players controlled with the 3DS’ gyroscopic feature, which would have made it even more nauseating and difficult to control. Revelations’ single player campaign is broken down into numerous chapters and acts, making the game very easy to pick up and play in short bursts; I often find Resident Evil titles very intense and absorbing and have to play them in long sessions but Revelations was a lot less stressful in this regard and you can play as much or as little as you like. The better you do in each chapter, the more points and rewards you will receive; these can be used in the game’s Raid Mode, which is a pretty nifty little feature similar to the Mercenaries mode of previous Resident Evil videogames.
Raid Mode offers a variety of bite-sized challenges.
In Raid Mode, players can pick a character (usually one of the main story protagonists), assign them weapons, buffs, and items, and take on a series of short missions based on the single player levels. Although these missions will be much shorter, they can be quite tough; players encounter enemies of varying levels (the higher the level, the tougher the enemies are), far less items (and no access to the Genesis device as far as I have seen), and are also encouraged to finish each mission in a decent time while also shooting at tokens for bonus points.
The sea provides some gigantic bosses to battle!
Overall, Revelations was a pretty good time; it was a blast to see some classic Resident Evil characters and enemies recreated and the story, while over-the-top even by Resident Evil standards, was tolerable and entertaining. It’s fun to blast through the main story mode and take on these new, unique enemies even if a lot of them are frustrating and annoying, especially when you’re low on ammo and can’t be bothered to waste time scanning with the Genesis to get more health. While I found myself getting lost quite a lot due to the poor map and would rather bite a limb off than ever take Jill swimming again, I otherwise really enjoyed the more action-orientated combat and the tense, claustrophobic atmosphere afforded by the game’s narrative and setting.
In many ways, this review is very redundant; by this point, I’m sure that everyone has heard everything there is to say about Alien: Isolation (Creative Assembly/SEGA, 2014). The title has been heaped with praise and accolades and, since it’s been out for a while now, there’s been plenty of reviews and opinions out there in the world so I guess this would now qualify as a retro review?
Whatever you do, don’t let that bastard see you!
Anyway, Alien: Isolation does a lot of firsts for the Alien franchise (Various, 1979 to present); like many standard Alien-branded videogames, Alien: Isolation adopts a first-person perspective and, rather than controlling a marine or series protagonist Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver), the player is put in control of Ripley’s daughter, Amanda. Also, not only does Alien: Isolation take place fifteen years after Alienand therefore closely resemble Alien’s low-tech, seventies-sci-fi aesthetic, it also emphasises survival over combat.
It’s a nice touch to feature Ripley’s daughter.
As I said, the player takes control of Amanda Ripley, who has grown up most of her life wondering what happened to her mother, who went missing fifteen years prior when all contact was lost with the Nostromo. When the Nostromo’s flight recorder is recovered, Amanda heads to Sevastopol, a massive space station in orbit around a gas giant, to investigate and find closure. However, a few catastrophes have befallen Sevastopol; many of the systems are offline or busted, the synthetic Working Joes are malfunctioning and attacking humans on sight, and an all-too-familiar alien organism is loose on the station and picking off the few human survivors. Quickly, Amanda is left alone (isolated, you might say) and with only her wits and a few resources to survive the ordeal and make it to safety.
Even saving the game is ripped straight from the movie!
Like Ridley Scott’s original classic, Alien: Isolation is all about atmosphere; sampling the movie’s look, feel, and soundtrack, the player is immersed in an unnerving silence or the ominous sense of hidden dread. A lot of the time, nothing especially engaging is really happening; you’re simply investigating, collecting items and gear, and making your way towards various objectives. Soon, though, Amanda encounters armed humans, who are liable to shoot you on sight or if they feel threatened, and the malfunctioning Working Joes, who make a bee-line for Amanda and attempt to choke or pound the life out of her. This is the player’s first taste of Alien: Isolation’s purposely-limited combat system; Amanda can pick up a pistol (but there is very limited ammunition and its not very effective against the androids), hit enemies with a wrench, or craft other useful items (pipe bombs, EMP mines, etc) to help take out or disable her opponents.
These bastards don’t go down without a fight!
However, most forms of attack will make a lot of noise, potentially attracting more enemies, and all of them are very hit-and-miss. Try and beat a Working Joe to death with a wrench, for example, and you’re gonna have a bad time; shoot a human and you better make sure to aim for the head and you have to consider whether it’s worth wasting your extremely limited ammo. Therefore, it is far more beneficial to distract enemies with a flare or a noisemaker and slowly creep past, using a vent if available, rather than engage in direct combat. This is quite a creative approach as not only does it make every encounter feel like a real struggle for survival and make the player carefully weigh their chances and inventory, but it also prepares you for your first and subsequent encounters with the Alien. Once the Xenomorph makes its grand debut, you’ll be relying more on your motion tracker and the various lockers and cover mechanics to hide because the Alien is completely invulnerable to harm.
Once the Alien appears, get used to this view!
The Alien also has its own independent artificial intelligence, meaning that, while it does follow certain traits, it acts differently each time to encounter it and appears to learn the more you engage with it. In the early going, it will stalk around trying to sniff you out and give up pretty soon and is easily chased away by a burst of flamethrower but, nearer the end of the story mode, it will stick around for quite a while and shrug off the flamethrower’s blasts. You can use flares and noisemakers to distract the Alien and lure it towards your human enemies, and it is very satisfying to watch/hear the Xenomorph slaughter a bunch of people and clear the way for you, but you must remain hidden or else it’s liable to sneak up behind you.
Fuck about and you’ll get this a lot, too!
Additionally, as you progress further, you have to make your way past or battle Working Joes while the Alien is nearby. Any noise made by running or attacking, or from your other enemies, will instantly alert the Alien, drawing it out from a vent or other area. You may find, as I did, that you spend agonising minutes hiding in a locker, holding your breath, and sporadically checking the motion tracker, only to have to dart right back into hiding despite the coast appearing to be clear. Using the motion tracker also attracts attention if enemies are nearby and it doesn’t make a distinction between floors; so, if the Alien is above you, you get a blip and waste a lot of time in hiding but, if you venture out, it’s likely to drop down on your ass from above without warning.
Crafting items is essential to your survival.
In addition to picking up pre-made weaponry and tools, Amanda can collect various bits and pieces to craft items; blueprints will allow the player to create more effective items but you can’t afford to waste any of them. Pipe bombs, for example, are extremely effective at scaring off the Alien or blowing up the androids, but they have a high craft cost; Molotov cocktails will also scare off the Alien and burn most other enemies but are also likely to explode in your face if you throw them too close. Crafting is quite fun and really puts you on edge; Amanda relies on crafting to create medkits and, when you don’t have enough gear to create one when you really need it, it can be extremely tense.
The difficulty really ramps up once you reach the nest!
One of the best aspects of Alien: Isolation is how well it re-enacts the look and feel of Alien; the attention to detail in the locations is amazing and everything looks exactly like it did in Alien. There’s even a great part where you flashback to LV-426 and investigate the crashed Engineer ship, which is recreated in astonishing detail. Later, when you venture into the Alien’s nest, the game wisely draws inspiration from Aliens (Cameron, 1986) and the latter parts of Alien to recreate the slimy, biomechanical look associated with Xenomorph lairs. The game also hints at the presence of an Alien Queen somewhere in the station’s reactor and/or the idea of “eggmorphing” from a deleted scene from Alien. This, accompanied by the fantastic use of Alien’s unnerving soundtrack, really makes the player feel absorbed in the narrative. However, this is almost to the videogame’s detriment; Alien: Isolation is a draining, occasionally frustrating experience. Every encounter is tense and a struggle; every time your motion tracker beeps, you’ll be on edge and scratting around to craft necessary items of find a suitable hiding place; and every time you think you’ve reached a mission objective, a door or path will be blocked and you’ll be redirected elsewhere or have to either hack or cut through doors, clamber up ladders while the room explodes around you, or space walk while the station disintegrates. As someone who grows increasingly paranoid when my resources are low, the path ahead is fraught with danger, and no save points are nearby, this as a constant source of frustration for me but even I have to admire how completely it immersed me into the experience.
The shit really hits the fan by the end!
In the end, all the praise that has been heaped upon Alien: Isolation is completely worth it. You’ll be constantly on edge when the Alien is about, and probably die more than once, but this is easily one of the best attempts at recreating the look and feel of a movie while still logically and smartly continuing the narrative in a dead zone between movies. Parts of the game are annoying, tedious, or repetitive but it all adds towards the atmosphere of the situation; Amanda is at her wit’s end and with very little resources or chances of survival, so obviously the game shouldn’t be a cake-walk, and there’s nothing like the cathartic feeling of reaching a save point or, even better, flushing that Xenomorph bastard out into space!
As may already be evident, I have a long-standing preference for the WCW and WWF videogames released by AKI/THQ back in my youth; however, another WWF videogame series I have been particularly fond of and spent many hours and days of my childhood playing has been the WWF SmackDown! series released by THQ and Yuke’s on Sony’s PlayStation in 2000. Eventually, this series evolved into the WWE SmackDown! Vs. Raw franchise, which was released on multiple consoles between 2004 and 2010. I believe I came into this series with WWE SmackDown! vs. Raw 2008 Featuring ECW (Yuke’s/Amaze Entertainment/THQ, 2007) and bowed out with WWE SmackDown! vs. Raw 2011 (Yuke’s/THQ, 2010) as, by this point, it was pretty clear to me that I was simply purchasing the same videogame every year with additional wrestlers, some new match types, and minor improvements to the graphics and gameplay. As a result, I decided to buy a new title every two years or so and, after enjoying WWE ’13 (ibid, 2012) and deciding that WWE 2K15 (Yuke’s/Visual Concepts/2K Sports, 2014) was far too stripped back on features to justify the price tag, I settled on getting WWE 2K14 (ibid, 2013) and biding my time.
WWE’s videogames eventually aped the yearly formula of the FIFA series.
As a result, I have not bought or played a new videogame in 2K Sports’ WWE 2K series for about four years now, and with good reason; as the series made the jump to the Xbox One and PlayStation 4, reviews and feedback ranged from resoundingly negative to mediocre displeasure as 2K Sports apparently removed many expected gameplay mechanics and features in what was nothing less than a blatant attempt to sell features seen in previous PlayStation 3-era titles as being “new”. Despite the additions of never-before-seen superstars such as Sting, AJ Styles, and Samoa Joe, I decided to wait it out until the release of WWE 2K18 (ibid, 2017) to give the series a chance to iron out these kinks and to create an ironic sense of symmetry given that the last title I played was WWE 2K14. As such, it took me a little while to become accustomed to WWE 2K18’s control scheme; previously, these titles allowed you the option of controlling your wrestler with the directional-pad (or “D-pad”) and taunting with the analogue stick, which is my preferred control scheme given how it mirrors that of the AKI/THQ titles.
WWE 2K18 loves these little wheels of death!
However, WWE 2K18 does not allow you to change the control scheme, meaning that I was forced to control my wrestler with the left analogue stick and taunt using the D-pad which, for an old school player like myself who dislikes change, took some getting used to. One of the other main reasons I prefer D-pad control is that I find it easier to direct and aim my opponent during running attacks or Irish whips; I find the analogue stick makes such aiming harder as the stick is more sensitive. WWE 2K18 also features some new mini games which replace the ones I had grown accustomed to in WWE 2K14; when being pinned, for example, you now have to press X on a little wheel rather than stopping a little bar that bounces back and forth. This is actually a lot trickier than it sounds as it seems the videogame is set up to make kicking out of pins harder than before to, I guess, allow for more “realistic” matches. Additionally, there is no longer the “Breaking Point” submission system; instead, there’s either a tricky mini game involving the analogue stick or you must mash one of the four action buttons when they appear onscreen. I went with the button mashing option but have found that winning a match by submission is not as easy as it used to be, potentially because you can no longer select a match to be either quicker, normal, or epic; this, and the improved attribute system, means that you are forced to work for your submission victory.
Suffer enough damage and you’ll roll from the ring to take a break.
Other gameplay changes can be seen in multi-man match; now, when you or another player receives enough damage, they automatically roll out of the ring and you must mash buttons to fill up a bar and re-enter the match. It sounds good on paper and, again, appears to be tooled towards making matches more “realistic” but I found it more annoying than anything else as you could end up stuck on the outside and lose the match. This mechanic carries over into ladder/TLC matches as well, making them considerably more frustrating than usual as you incur far more damage much faster in these matches so you’ll spend a lot of time mashing buttons to get back into the matches. Also, in ladder/TLC matches, you no longer pull down the belt of briefcase using the right analogue stick; instead, you have to play a little mini game where you must fill up segments of a circle by rotating a ball into a small hole using the right analogue stick. It’s fun but quite distracting; I found myself concentrating more on the mini game than the match and, if you get interrupted with only a couple (or, even worse, one) segments left to fill, you are almost guaranteed to lose the match as the next wrestler to play the mini game will probably complete the circle while you’re busy mashing buttons to get back into the match.
Multi-man TLC matches are still the worst.
The Royal Rumble match is also noticeably different and, technically, more difficult; rather than hitting buttons in a quick-time event as in WWE 2K14, you now have to mash a button when trying to eliminate an opponent. Honestly, I’ve played a couple of these matches and never once eliminated anyone using the button-mashing mini game no matter what their health and stamina. I found the best way to eliminate wrestlers was the tried-and-true Royal Rumble finisher, clotheslining them out of the ring or countering a run attack, or by exploiting a glitch where, if you whip the opponent onto the apron and quickly punch them repeatedly, they simply fall from the ring.
I struggled to legitimately eliminate anyone in the Royal Rumble…
As I always found ladder, TLC, and Royal Rumble matches tedious any way, these gameplay changes don’t bother me that much; you are not forced to play these matches and, on the whole, I would just avoid them. Some good changes have been made to tables matches, though; every time you hit your opponent with or into a table, it fills up a break meter and, once it’s full, you can smash the opponent through it using some new and expanded options. 2K Sports have also introduced a carry system, similar to the one from WWE SmackDown! vs. Raw 2007 (Yuke’s/THQ, 2006), which allows you to smash your opponent off the ropes, turnbuckles, apron, and other objects. They’ve also brought back in-crowd fighting, to a degree, allowing you to smash your opponent through (or hit them over) the barricade at ringside or toss them from the stage area to fight in little areas near the crowd.
Universe mode is back, bigger and better than ever.
Although create-a-story and create-a-finisher are no longer options, WWE 2K18 is still full to the brim with creation options. I honestly spent maybe five days or so setting everything up the way I wanted it and creating wrestlers, entrances, victories, shows, and teams in the expanded Universe mode. As before, Universe mode allows you to create a show, place wrestlers and championships on the show, and then create monthly pay-per-view events for that show. I like to recreate the product as closely as possible so I created a Raw, SmackDown! Live, and NXT brand (with 205 Live and Main Event as minor shows) and, for all the Legends and duplicate wrestlers, a WCW Monday Nitro brand (with some crossover between them all). You can create more than one Universe at a time but I prefer to have it all in one place rather than jumping backwards and forwards all the time; I then moved every pay-per-view event to their correct calendar month and also created some additional pay-per-vews for my NXT and Nitro brands; this is extremely in-depth, allowing you to choose from a whole bunch of preset or created arenas (with scene transitions, an array of screen filters, a bunch of different referees, and more).
There are loads of colour and customisation options.
You can still create your own championship belts as well, if that’s your thing; given how many old school belts are in the videogame, I don’t tend to do much with this, though. Instead, my focus was on the massively deep create-a-wrestler mode; created wrestlers look more realistic than ever before and you can choose from a whole bunch of options, from wrinkles to scars, facial and body hair, eye colour, veins, muscle definition, and even how much body oil your created wrestler has! There are also a whole load of attire options, including blank attires that you can customise as you desire and also pre-set attires worn by the featured roster; you can change not only the colour of these attires but also the material type, which allows shirts and jeans and the like to be leather, take on a metallic hue, or even glow in the dark! Finally, there are far more options for names for your created wrestler this year and the in-game commentary team will refer to your created wrestler by these throughout their matches.
Apparently you can put a price on greatness.
Although there are many WWE and superstar-related images available to you in this mode, there are noticeably less options for body tattoos this years, unfortunately. This is where the Community Creations option will come into play; you are able to upload images to the 2K Sports website and transfer them into the videogame, meaning you can search in the WWE 2K18 for a whole bunch of professionally-designed images, logos, and tattoos to apply to your created wrestler. You can also download created wrestlers created by others to account for those wrestlers omitted from this years roster, though you are limited to twenty downloads a day and cannot download created wrestlers that feature aspects from wrestlers you’ve yet to unlock or purchase. Speaking of which, WWE 2K18 features an in-ring store mode, as is the norm for this series now. As you play matches, you are awarded virtual currency based on how many stars your match scored; the more stars you get through move variety, countering, and such, the more currency you earn. You can then spend this in the store to unlock Legends, and additional arenas and championships and, make no mistake, this is the only way to unlock this extra content. Previously, in WWE 2K14 at least, you could unlock new wrestlers by playing the 30 Years of WrestleMania mode but, here, you can only do this by purchasing them.
You can do this by playing any match in any mode and, also, through the MyPlayer mode, which is the career mode of the videogame. You have to create a wrestler, using far more limited tools and options, and work your way through training and wrestling on NXT before being called up to the main roster. You can make some limited decisions to decide whether you are a Company Man (a heel) or a Fan Favourite (a face). In my playthrough, I was initially called up to Raw and forced to lose a bunch of matches, so I jumped to SmackDown! Live, where I won the United States Championship, Money in the Bank ladder match, and Royal Rumble match and am currently feuding with Triple H and the Authority on the path towards the WWE Championship. Along the way, you can partake in side quests to earn rewards (new moves, attire, and currency), make a signature t-shirt to earn some extra cash, and perform in-ring promos and run-ins.
You’ll need to pay to get the most out of MyPlayer mode.
Overall, this mode is quite enjoyable but, honestly, it’s a poor substitute for a Road to WrestleMania-type of mode. There are a lot of load times and some noticeable frame drops; you are also forced to walk/run from the garage to the producer and back every single week, which begs the question why they bothered putting in the free-roaming backstage area at all rather than just have a set-up similar to the PlayStation 3-era titles where you had a locker room with a phone and just did everything through text. There are some inconsistencies; I was regularly teaming with Sami Zayn then, randomly and with no explanation, my partner suddenly became Fandango. I was also once asked by Tius O’Neil to attack Primo Colón one week but, when I couldn’t find him, ended up attacking Kassius Ohno. There are also a lot of times when you do more promos than matches, when the match objectives aren’t completely clear (the Money in the Bank match springs to mind), and when your matches end due to interference more often than not but, these issues aside, it’s a pretty decent mode, though I found it more enjoyable and profitable to play Universe mode more than anything.
It’s interesting that the load times for the MyPlayer mode are so atrocious as, normally, they’re not that bad; matches in Universe mode load much faster than in WWE 2K14. I learned from some of my mistakes in WWE 2K14 and don’t have nearly as many custom arenas or created wrestlers, which may help with this, and also towards limiting crashes. WWE 2K14 would crash all the time, usually after a match but sometimes before one, and it was very frustrating. I have had a few crashes in WWE 2K18 but, as the matches and the videogame loads up a lot faster, it’s not as annoying. One bug that is annoying is, when downloading a created wrestler, attached logos and images will sometimes not download, meaning you’re left having to either find them separately or with an incomplete created wrestler/attire.
I haven’t played WWE 2K18 online yet, mainly because I don’t have Xbox Gold or whatever you need to do that but also because online players are trolling, move-spamming sons of bitches; also, the learning curve for timing reversals and having competitive but enjoyable matches that I actually won was quite steep. Sometimes, you’ll have a match and be in complete control and all the opponent has to do is a couple of moves and you can’t recover, then you get hit with one finisher and its over. A good feature, though, is that miss-matched opponents (like Braun Strowman against Kalisto) often trigger a squash match, where you gain full momentum and a finisher after your first hit and win the match in seconds for a decent payday.
All the Sting you could ever want!
The roster in WWE 2K18 is as deep as you could want; there are some noticeable omissions from NXT but, otherwise, everyone you could want and more is in the videogame alongside some decent and surprising Legends. Hulk Hogan and Yokozuna are gone but Vader and the Big Boss Man are back; there are some crazy instances of numerous duplicates, such as five (five!) versions of Sting and separating Finn Balor and his Demon King attire (though the Demon King does still act as an alternative attire to regular Balor) but, mostly, there’s some good inclusions this year. The soundtrack, apparently “curated” by the Rock, is mostly miss rather than hit, with the only decent track being a radio edit version of Disturbed’s Down With the Sickness, though a similarly-edited version of Limp Bizkit’s Rollin’ is used as the entrance theme for Undertaker ’00 despite this particular version of Undertaker’s biker gimmick actually being more associated with You’re Gonna Pay. The in-game commentary is all-new, at least for me anyway, including the three-man team of Michael Cole, Corey Graves, and Byron Saxton; mostly, it is far better than what I experienced in WWE 2K14 but there still times when they refer to women as “guys”, talk inanely about things not even relevant to the match in progress, or ask each other questions that are never answered.
Graphically, WWE 2K18 is very impressive.
Overall, WWE 2K18 is a challenging and enjoyable affair; Universe mode is bigger and more expansive than ever, with shorter load times and significantly less crashes and glitches (so far), and the star rating system does make it feel as though each match is important and worth something. MyPlayer suffers a bit (though admittedly this may also be because I don’t want to waste my virtual currency upgrading the MyPlayer character unless I absolutely have to as I want to unlock the Legends) but is, otherwise, fun enough for what it is. I would have also liked to have seen, at least, Showcase matches similar to previous titles or themed around a wrestler (this year’s pre-order bonus, Kurt Angle, for example, or Shawn Michaels, or even the cover star, Seth Rollins) to assist with the unlocking of extra content. Creation options are deep and versatile; you can waste hours and even days crafting the perfect created wrestler (I know I did!) or downloading extra attires and wrestlers to fill out the already impressive roster. I am glad that I waited for 2K Sports to add in many of the features they previously omitted and refine their current-generation gameplay engine as it seems to have paid off; matches are far more realistic and challenging than in WWE 2K14, where I could win with a minimum of effort, which is good once you’re used to the control scheme and what is expected of you, if admittedly somewhat detrimental to those who just want to pick it up and play a quick match without any obligation to simulating a real-life WWE match. Based on my experience with this title, I will probably wait until WWE 2K20 for my next entry into the series as I would never recommend anyone buys these titles on a yearly basis but, if like me, you’ve been away from the series for a while, I would definitely recommend picking this one up.
Similar to Banjo-Tooie(Rare, 2000), Conker’s Bad Fur Day (Rare, 2001) is an action-platformer originally released near the end of the Nintendo 64’s lifespan that I had planned on picking up back when it first came out but, due to a combination of having no money and other priorities at the time, I was never able to. I remember borrowing a copy and briefly playing it but nothing concrete; since then, I had trawled Amazon and eBay to try and find a copy, only to find it reaching extortionate prices as one of the rarest and most expensive Nintendo 64 titles even in an unboxed state. In 2005, Microsoft released a prettied-up remake for the Xbox 360 which I planned to get once I bought the Xbox One. Luckily for me, however, the title was including in the Rare Replay (Microsoft Studios/Rare, 2015) collection and, after sixteen years of waiting and anticipation, I was finally able to play this elusive title with high hopes of an experience comparable to that of its predecessors, Banjo-Kazooie(Rare, 1998) and Banjo-Tooie.
Boy, was I disappointed.
In Conker’s Bad Fur Day, you assume control of an anthropomorphic, beer-drinking red squirrel named Conker who, after a particularly bad night of drinking and debauchery, attempts to stumble home to his girlfriend, Berri. However, the Panther King’s side table is missing a leg and his lackey, Professor Von Kriplesac, suggests using a red squirrel as a substitute; thus, Conker is not only beset by the Panther King’s minions but also a series of increasingly daft missions and side quests, and the search for wads of cash that are dotted about the land. Although the overworld and scope of the game feels smaller than Banjo-Tooie, the concept is similar; Conker traverses a large overworld, which provides access to a number of sub-worlds, in which he must complete a number of side quests and missions to be awarded with cash. Once Conker has accumulated enough cash, he can access other worlds and the game expands further. Each world allows Conker to perform new actions and afford him different abilities, but he cannot carry these over into another world (for instance, in one world, Conker wields a shotgun to dispatch zombies, but he cannot use this weapon in the overworld or in other areas). There are also numerous times throughout the game when Conker can utilise a context-sensitive pad to open up new areas or reach the ever-elusive cash.
Conker’s Bad Fur Day utilises a life system, which is a bit of a step back from Banjo-Tooie, which gave the player unlimited lives. Conker has to grab squirrel tails in order to gain extra tries at beating the game but, once they run out, it’s game over and you have to start again from the last save point. Conker’s health is measured in segments of chocolate, which can be found dotted around every level of the game. However, this is where the game’s most glaring issue lies; Conker is probably the weakest videogame protagonist ever. Conker takes damage when he falls from anything higher than a couple of steps (meaning that a fall from a great height will result in instant death more often than not), chocolate segments are few and far between, and there’s no way to expand or enhance his life bar. There are numerous times when Conker either takes double damage or dies instantly from one shot, making the game feel very cheap and frustrating as it’s not so much a question of player skill and more the fact that Conker is so incredibly weak, especially compared to Banjo and Kazooie.
Conker’s basic controls are fluid and smooth; Conker runs, jumps, swims, and can hover in the air by spinning his tail like a helicopter all with the same grace and poise you expect from a Rare title. Conker’s main enemies whenever he is performing these basic platforming actions are the camera, which swings around wildly and is oddly intrusive, and the fact that Conker can easily slip from paths and walkways; without the ability to grab ledges, it’s far too easy to fall to your doom. However, it’s when you gain access to his additional abilities where the game’s flaws begin to really rear their head. When Conker receives the aforementioned shotgun, you have a choice between using it from a third-person perspective (which makes it difficult to aim) or from a first-person viewpoint (where the controls are reversed, slow, and clunky). Similar to the forced first-person shooting segments from Banjo-Tooie, any time Conker has to use guns really brings the game down and makes for some of the most frustrating parts of the game; Conker reloads too slowly, has terrible aim, and the shooting is annoyingly bad from a company that perfected first-person shooting in GoldenEye 007(Rare, 1997) and utilised a far better third-person shooting mechanic in Jet Force Gemini (Rare, 1999). Honestly, I expected much better from Rare after they proved they can do first- and third-person shooting and action platforming a lot better in their previous titles. The fact that all these elements are so poorly implemented in this game really makes it difficult to play through and to enjoy.
However, Conker’s Bad Fur Day has many elements that are enjoyable; the game looks and sounds amazing, with some of the wackiest and strangest anthropomorphic characters you’ll ever encounter (Conker encounters a talking pot of paint, an opera-singing giant turd, mafia weasels, and battles a Xenomorph, amongst other things). Heading into this game, I was fully aware of its mature content; blood bursts from enemies as they are blown apart, characters swear every other word, and the game definitely isn’t taking itself seriously at all. To my surprise, Conker isn’t actually the foul-mouthed character I expected heading into the game. He’s a drunkard (the opening moments have you controlling him as he stumbles about and pees everywhere) and a greedy little git (he attacks wads of cash with a frying pain and stuffs them down his shorts with reckless abandon) but it’s actually the other characters he meets that swear and provide most of the mature content.
Conker’s Bad Fur Day is also, to its detriment, an oxymoron; the game has a lot of variety but also way too much repetition. So, one minute you might be gunning down wasps, rolling balls of poo into a giant turd mountain, or retrieving objects to fulfil your missions but you can guarantee that if you have to do these things once you’ll have to do them again, anywhere from three to five times. It gets extremely frustrating to have to repeat these actions so many times, especially while fighting the controls; for example, in the first level, Conker has to find some cheese for a mouse. You have to find three pieces of cheese and each one has to be collected separately and also find five bees to pollinate a sunflower (which you later have to use to bounce to a wad of cash but good luck getting the timing of the bouncing right and, when you do get the timing right, the controls fight you so you miss the ledge and fall from a height high enough to cause you significant damage!)
Seriously, this damn sunflower took me the better part of forty minutes to get past!
Similarly, there’s a part where you have to scare some cows into pooping to access a new area. To do this, you have to trick a bull into hitting a target, jump on the bull, and scare the cow. Once it’s pooped, you kill the cow and another waddles out, and you have to repeat this again twice more. There’s an even worse task in the Rock Solid disco. Conker has to get drunk, stagger around, and pee on a rock monster so it turns into a ball, then roll it into an opening. You then have to roll it along a narrow path, hope you don’t fall off, and onto a switch to rescue Berri. You then have to do this twice more and, if you don’t get enough pee on the rock monsters, they pop up and attack you. Things like this are so incredibly tedious and laborious tasks that get old and frustrating very quickly. Later on, Conker gets transformed into a vampire bat and must poop on some villages to stun them and then carry them to a meat grinder. The controls make all this extremely difficult and annoying to pull off, especially considering how often you have to repeat the task. Things only get worse in the It’s War! Chapter; in a parody of Saving Private Ryan (Spielberg, 1998), Conker joins the war against the Nazi-like Tediz. While this makes for some of the game’s most amusing and controversial moments, it is also host to easily the absolute worst part of not only this game, but maybe any game I’ve ever played.
After defeating the boss, Conker has a limited time to navigate through tight corridors full of laser trip wires; if you touch the wires, explosives go off and cost Conker at least two pieces of health. At various points, Tediz will also attack Conker with bayonets, forcing you to switch to the awkward first- or third-person shooting perspectives to attack them. Once you make it through these obstacles, though, you get locked in a room full of Tediz who start shooting at you; you get about two seconds to whip out a bazooka before you’re blown to pieces. The only way to succeed is to try and try and try again and again to master the trip wires and the Tediz in the corridor so you get through flawlessly and have all of your health for this final shoot-out to give you a gnat’s wing of a chance to positioning yourself properly to shoot all the Tediz. There’s no health in this areas, no chance for error, oh, and, also, if you shoot your bazooka too haphazardly then you’ll blow yourself up!
Good luck getting through this crap without the fifty-lives code!
However, for every bad part of the game, there are positives; the boss battles are amusing and interesting, the worlds are full of life an activity (although there’s far less to collect than in the Banjo games), and the storyline is very funny and tongue-in-cheek. Ironically, though, the final area and final boss is perhaps the easiest part of the game. In a shocking twist, Berri is killed before Conker’s eyes and a Xenomorph bursts out of the Panther King. Conker has to (clunkily) beat the Xenomorph down and then throw it into an airlock (three times, naturally…). As the Xenomorphs moves in for the kill, the game locks up; Conker breaks the forth wall to get the programmers to help him out and wins the day, but forgets to get Berri brought back to life. Conker ends up being crowned the new king and sits, disenchanted and annoyed, surrounded by the characters he has helped out throughout his little quest (all of whom he hates). Conker’s Bad Fur Day is a beautiful and challenging game…but it’s so damn frustrating and annoying! I don’t mind a challenge but this game takes it to another level! There is absolutely no hand-holding and no quarter given; this would be fine if the controls and camera didn’t work against you all the time and if Conker wasn’t so weak. I wouldn’t mind repeating some of the tasks you have to do if they were actually fun by the third time; once, maybe, but having to repeat some many laborious tasks really gets annoying very quickly. The boss battles are all multi-layered and challenging, though a lot easier than the platforming and puzzle-solving aspects of the game. The humour is crude, rude, and hilarious at certain points; it’s obvious that Rare were having a lot of fun just pushing the envelope and doing whatever they wanted in this title.
However, it also feels like they’re openly mocking the player and purposely implanting terrible gameplay mechanics; that must be the case as I know they can do better action platformers, better first person shooters, and better third person shooters. The game also has a tacked on multi-player component which involves these shooting aspects, however I’ve not played it and have no urge to given how bad the controls are for these parts of the game. And that’s the summary of it all, really. I have no urge or desire to ever play this game again, and that’s really disappointing to me. I loved the Banjo games and everything they did; I love a good, bright, fun action platformer and I’m all for variety and trying now things…but this game just has far too many negative points for me to ever hold it in as high regard as I do Banjo-Kazooie or even Banjo-Tooie, which is a massive personal disappointment for me.
To reach Gruntilda, Banjo and Kazooie had to traverse a variety of worlds and collect a multitude of items, the most important of which were Jiggies – which were required to access new worlds and climb higher up Gruntilda’s castle. The game was a huge success for Rare, heralding a number of successes for the company on the Nintendo 64, and has been a personal favourite of mine for nearly a decade now for its charming aesthetics, catching music, amusing characters, and vibrant worlds.
One of gaming’s most unique duos.
Back in 1998, Rare developed an incredibly intricate and amusing platform videogame called Banjo-Kazooie. The game starred a slightly slow, but very helpful, honey bear named Banjo, who first featured in Diddy Kong Racing in 1997. Banjo, humorously garbed in bright yellow short-shorts, carried around his friend and counterpart – a Breegull named Kazooie – in a blue back-pack. Together, the two were tasked with rescuing Banjo’s kid sister, Tooty, from the evil witch Gruntilda, aided along the way by Bottles, a short-sighted mole who teaches the two their attacks and abilities, and Mumbo-Jumbo, a shaman who transforms the duo into other forms to aid their quest. In 2000, Rare finally produced a sequel, Banjo-Tooie, which was released near the end of the Nintendo 64’s lifespan and has consequently become one of the rarest and most expensive videogames around, even when bought unboxed. As a result, obtaining a copy has been a goal of mine for years, ever since I briefly played it in 2001, and in 2013 I was finally able to procure a copy and play the game through to completion. Of course, since then, the title (alongside the original and many of Rare’s top titles from the area, before, and beyond) was given a high-definition remaster that I later picked up as part of Rare Replay for Xbox One.
Grunty is back and out for revenge!
Banjo-Tooie picks up two years after Gruntilda’s defeat. Trapped underneath a giant boulder, she summons her sisters, Mingella and Blobbbelda, to free her so she can avenge her defeat. Now little more than a skeleton, she destroys Banjo’s house, killing Bottles, and prepares a special ray gun that will suck the life out of the planet and restore her physical form. Eager for another adventure and desiring revenge for he death of Bottles, Banjo and Kazooie head out to travel new worlds and put the witch to rest once and more all. The first thing to note about Banjo-Tooie is how much bigger it is than its predecessor. Not only can players run around Spiral Mountain (the tutorial area from the first game) and re-enter the mouth of Gruntilda’s Castle, the player can explore and travel through an all-new overworld that is intricately connected to the playable levels in the game. For instance, rather than opening up worlds to enter in a central hub as in the previous game, the players go from one hub to the next following the path of Gruntilda’s digging machine through a huge overworld. Whilst exploring each level, the player can open up shortcuts to other levels, the most obvious being Chuffy the Train, but other sluiceways, tunnels, and paths also exist which connect one world to the next and allow players to traverse what now feels like an entire world rather than an enclosed space.
Jamjars has some new moves to teach Banjo and Kazooie.
The main aim of the game is still to collect loads of items, but the actual task is much less tedious. Previously, the player was awarded for collecting each world’s 100 musical notes, but the number you collected reset every time you left a world and re-entered it. Now, the number carries over, and they are a lot easier to find and collect. Jiggies, however, are found in a multitude of ways, as before, with each world now being home to a formidable boss battle which will test Banjo and Kazooie’s new skills. Speaking of which, Bottles’ brother, Jamjars, is on hand to teach the duo additional moves. While Banjo and Kazooie are capable of every move from the last game bar one (Banjo’s bear swipes are absent), Jamjars loads the player up with a variety of new eggs to shoot at enemies (which becomes a focal point in the game during its many first-person-shooter sequences), the ever-handy Grip Grab that allows Banjo to hang on to ledges, and the ability to have Banjo and Kazooie separate from each other to tackle switch-based puzzles. Mumbo now becomes a secondary character, as players use his magic to access unreachable areas and acquire Jiggies, while Humba Wumba’s spells are used to turn the duo into new forms, which are new required for a multitude of Jiggy-based tasks and even to conquer certain bosses.
Banjo-Tooie has many secrets and collectables.
One of the greatest things about Banjo-Kazooie was its many secrets, most of which were meant to be accessed in Banjo-Tooie through a unique “Stop and Swap” feature that, theoretically, would have seen players swap one cart for another to unlock new content. Though this feature was eventually dropped, the ever-mysterious Ice Key and Secret Eggs return in this game, now used to unlock new moves and the awesome Dragon Kazooie, though the full extent of this feature would not be made accessible until the Xbox 360 HD remixes. Banjo-Tooie also features a multiplayer mode, allowing for up to four players to take part in Goldeneye 007-like deathmatches and other modes that, honestly, I haven’t played but I imagine are similar to the same multiplayer modes seen in Conker’s Bad Fur Day. Like The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask, Banjo-Tooie features many recycled characters and character models, as characters encountered in the previous game return to aid or hinder the duo at various points.
It’s all about the story…except when it’s not…
In the end, playing Banjo-Tooie was an awesome experience, but a couple of things let it down for me. Firstly, why remove Banjo’s bear swipes? This seems like a nit-pick, but I expected Banjo to have the attack when he goes solo and he never acquires it, meaning that he is limited to his Pack Whack move. Second, when you acquire a Jiggy, Banjo and Kazooie no longer go into a cute little celebration animation. The Jiggy is simply collected and you move on. While I don’t necessarily mind this, as the lack of the celebration means you don’t get any wasted momentum, it kind of makes acquiring Jiggies mean a lot less as the characters no longer seem to care. Next, the game takes a long time to get started – the opening cutscene is quite long and, at various points at the game’s beginning, the action cuts to a cutscene that shows Gruntilda’s plan in motion. Then you never hear anything of her plot until the final boss, which is pretty jarring – Gruntilda uses her restoration ray once and you never hear anything of it again, so the threat seems diminished and an afterthought by the conclusion. You also never confront her two sisters, which seemed a given, though the addition of a boss for each level kind of made up for that.
There’s a bunch of new transformations to play around with.
Certain other aspects are a bit tedious as well; before, when you tried to exit a level as a transformed Banjo and Kazooie, Mumbo’s magic would automatically wear off. Here though, you must return to Wumba to transform back into the duo to exit – similarly, Mumbo and either character alone cannot exit levels and must switch back to do so, which can get a bit tedious. There’s a ton of backtracking in this game, which can be frustrating but it’s great to see how characters and events in one level can affect and influence the other, so I didn’t mind this too much and it didn’t really feel like it was padding the game out, more that the world was big and interconnected, so backtracking is more like a given. Also, in comparison to the first game, the ending felt a little limp and the overall game time seemed less – I finished the entire game in just under 25 hours, whereas I remember working on Banjo-Kazooie for a long time, but that may have just been rooting around for more secrets and such.
My Rating:
⭐⭐⭐⭐
Rating: 4 out of 5.
Great Stuff
In the end, the game is a masterful example of how to make a great action/platform title – colourful worlds, great music, amusing characters, loads (and loads) to do, see, and collect, great controls (flying and swimming can be a bit testy, as before, however), and a pretty simple premise. Games like this aren’t really made much anymore – once you beat videogames these days, there’s not much incentive to pick up and play again, but in the Banjo titles there’s always more to do. As the Nintendo 64 copy is quite expensive, I recommended Xbox owners download both titles (or purchase Rare Replay) and play them to death and think themselves lucky to be able to experience the full games.
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