Author: Dr. K

Movie Night: Kraven the Hunter

Dr. K1 Comment

Released: 13 December 2024
Director: J. C. Chandor
Distributor: Sony Pictures Releasing
Budget: $110 to 130 million
Stars: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ariana DeBose, Alessandro Nivola, Fred Hechinger, and Russell Crowe

The Plot:
Saved from death as a boy by a voodoo serum, Sergei Kravinoff (Taylor-Johnson) hunts wrongdoers as “Kraven the Hunter”. However, when his past comes back to haunt him, Kraven must fight to rescue his cowardly younger brother, Dmitri (Hechinger), from a maniacal, half-human, wannabe mobster.

The Background:
Following the phenomenal success of Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy (2000 to 2007) and the sadly mediocre reception of Marc Webb’s reboot films, Marvel Studios finally achieved the impossible by striking a deal to include the iconic wall-crawler in their Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU). After seeing the incredible success of Spider-Man: Homecoming (Watts, 2017), Sony were excited enough to greenlight a bunch of spin-offs that would focus on Spidey’s villains and side characters. After Venom (Fleischer, 2018) made bank, Sony not only signed off on a very profitable (if critically maligned) sequel, but also, inexplicably, solo projects for Roy Thomas and Gil Kane’s “Living Vampire”, Doctor Michael Morbius, Denny O’Neil John Romita Jr.’s, Cassandra Webb/Madame Web, and Stan Lee and Steve Ditko’s Sergei Kravinoff/Kraven the Hunter, a character best known for his memorable (if temporary) death in the celebrated “Kraven’s Last Hunt” (DeMatteis, et al, 1987) arc. Although a prominent villain in videogames and the 1990’s Spider-Man cartoon, Kraven’s journey to the silver screen was fraught with years of stop/start efforts. After committing to the idea of their own adjacent series of interconnected Spider-Man movies, production of a solo Kraven film began in earnest in August 2018. Screenwriter Richard Wenk shared that his screenplay was heavily influenced by “Kraven’s Last Hunt” and that he was experimenting with different directions for the character depending on Peter Parker/Spider-Man’s inclusion, all while MCU creators pitched including Kraven in their films. Aaron Taylor-Johnson joined the project and underwent an intense training regime to prepare for the title role, attracted to the film for its deeply interpersonal story. After a number of delays, Kraven the Hunter finally released to universally negative reviews and, as of this writing, the film hasn’t even made $30 million at the box office. Critics tore apart the obvious dubbing of scenes, the disastrous execution, and the tiresome concept of a Spider-Man-less Spider-Man movie. Though director J. C. Chandor was hopeful of a sequel and Taylor-Johnson was contracted for additional appearances, those hopes seem dashed not only by the film’s poor reception but Sony’s announcement that they’ll be refocusing their Spider-Man efforts.

The Review:
It’s baffling to me that Sony just forgot how to make decent Spider-Man movies. Apart from their animated ventures, all their Spider-Man spin-offs have been mediocre to terrible and completely directionless. I can almost understand making standalone Venom movies and it was surprising how well they worked without Spider-Man, but was anyone asking for solo movies for Spidey’s low tier villains and supporting characters? Maybe if there had some kind of plan, like linking all these spin-offs into a coherent, adjacent universe or bringing back Andrew Garfield for a series of showdowns with these characters then maybe, maybe, things would’ve been different. Instead, we live in a world where Sony legitimately thought people would pay to see Kraven the Hunter, of all people. To be fair, Aaron Taylor-Johnson certainly looks the part. He’s ripped and exudes a rugged charisma that certainly catches the eye and his Russian accent and dialect is commendable. He’s easily the best part of this film but that’s a bittersweet compliment as he’s completely wasted here instead of being put to better use in a film that’s not completely forgettable ten minutes in, let alone by the end. Kraven the Hunter opens with Kraven a fully-fledged manhunter; he infiltrates a Russian prison to assassinate crime lord and poacher Seymon Chorney (Yuri Kolokolnikov), an act that kicks off the central conflict of the movie. The film then jumps back in time sixteen years to introduce us to a young Sergei (Levi Miller) and Dmitri (Billy Barratt) and set up their shared and individual issues with their father, kingpin and avid game hunter Nikolai Kravinoff (Crowe).

Following a vicious attack and mystical serum, Kraven becomes a renowned manhunter.

This extended flashback establishes that the Kravinoff boys fear and loathe their authoritarian father, who believes in survival of the fittest and refuses to show or tolerate any weakness in either himself, his vaguely defined criminal organisation, and his two boys. Resentful towards Nikolai for his treatment of their mother (Masha Vasyukova), who was mentally unwell and took her own life, the young Kravinoffs are nevertheless powerless to defy their father’s will and forced to accompany him to Tanzania for a hunting trip. While Nikolai favours Sergei, he’s critical and dismissive towards his bastard child, Dmitri, whom Sergei tries to defend at all costs. This drive sees Sergei leap to Dmitri’s defence when a gigantic lion approaches them in the wilds. Hesitating to shoot, Sergei is mauled and hauled away by the beast, leaving Dmitri in hysterics and Sergei close to death. Luckily for him, young Calypso Ezili (Diaana Babnicova) just happened to be vacationing in the area, coincidentally learned from her grandmother’s (Susan Aderin) tarot cards about Sergei’s fate, and carries a helpful voodoo serum which, coupled with the lion’s blood, not only saves Sergei’s life but bestows him with vaguely mystical animal powers. After fully recovering and lashing out at his father’s abhorrent ways, Sergei packs up and leaves, strangely leaving Dmitri behind, fleeing to his mother’s sanctuary (essentially a spherical greenhouse) in the far reaches of Russia. There, Sergei learns the extent of his new abilities: he’s fast like a cheetah, climbs skyscrapers and trees like an ape, is soft footed like a deer (to the extent that he apparently negates people’s peripheral vision), has eyes like a hawk, and superhuman hearing and durability. These gifts allow him to build a reputation as the world’s greatest hunter and he carves a name for himself as “Kraven”, hunting down crime lords like his father (but, oddly, not his father) and local poachers. In all that time, no one has ever pieced together that Kraven is Sergei Kravinoff and his name has become legend. He travels the world with his unseen pilot (whose scenes were clearly left on the cutting room floor) ticking names off his list. However, he riles up the criminal underworld when he kills Chorney as it leaves a power vacuum that both Nikolai and would-be kingpin Aleksei Sytsevich/The Rhino (Nivola) are eager to fill.

Kraven’s family issues see him make unlikely and underutilised allies.

As mentioned, I don’t get why Sergei left Dmitri behind. The boy lived in constant fear of his father and was desperate to earn his approval and respect, an uphill battle he was seemingly doomed to never win, even with his “chameleon” like talent to mimic voices and lovely singing voice. It seems like it would’ve made more sense for Sergei to take Dmitri and for him to be his pilot but, instead, Dmitri ends up kidnapped by the Rhino and held to ransom, forcing Sergei to reunite with Nikolai and begrudgingly work alongside his estranged father to rescue his troublesome little brother. Despite being renowned as the greatest hunter in the world, it takes Kraven sixteen years to track down the now adult Calypso (DeBose), now a lawyer living in London and jaded by the bureaucratic justice system. Though initially hesitant because of Kraven’s violent lifestyle, Calypso reluctantly agrees to help him track down the Rhino and warns him against pursuing dangerous crime lords, a caution that comes true when Dmitri is kidnapped and Calypso is also targeted by the Rhino in a bid to flush Kraven out. If there’s supposed to be a romantic subplot between Kraven and Calypso, this also seems to have been cut from the film. Calypso certainly looks the part and there are glimpses of chemistry between her and Kraven, but so much of her dialogue is clearly redubbed through ADR and it’s not only jarring but leaves much of her performance flat as a result. She just about manages to prove her worth, however, and she’s never held hostage like Dmitri. She also has contacts who provide Kraven with leads (even if they’re false ones courtesy of the Rhino’s slick henchman, “The Foreigner” (Christopher Abbott), a superhuman mercenary with unexplained hypnotic powers), and even saves Kraven’s life when he’s drugged and brought to the brink of death once more.

Aside form Nikolai, the film’s villains are bizarre and dull, poorly characterisaed antagonists.

Despite years of mistreatment, resentment, and hatred towards his father, Kraven purposely leaves Nikolai off his list because, for all his flaws, the crime lord is still the hunter’s father. Kraven reunites with his father and brother once a year for Dmitri’s birthday, growing more and more troubled by his brother’s obsession with pleasing the old man, and rebukes Nikolai when he refuses to pay Dmitri’s ransom to avoid showing weakness. Taking matters into his own hands, Kraven tracks down the Rhino and runs into the Foreigner, a mysterious assassin who, honestly, could’ve easily been cut from the film or supplanted with someone else. While we learn of his personal grudge against Kraven, we never learn the Foreigner’s real name, how he got his strange powers, or even what the extent of them are. He easily subdues and murders anyone in his path until he reaches Kraven, who he decides to drug, cripple, and beat up rather than go for a quick kill, which costs the Foreigner his life. Compounding matters is the use of the Rhino, of all people, as the film’s main antagonist. Reimagined as a neurotic, semi-maniacal would-be crime lord who craves attention and a “partner” to elevate him up the ranks, the Rhino is a strange, cartoonish villain just as apt to make bizarre noises as he is to monologue about his aspirations. After being disregarded by Nikolai for his physical weaknesses and needy demeanour, the Rhino turned to Doctor Miles Warren for both a cure for his condition and a means to become stronger. The result was some unexplained genetic tampering that turned Sytsevich’s skin into an impenetrable hide and bestowed him with incredible strength, much like his namesake, but also causes him such agony that he medically keeps the transformation at bay. Instead, he orchestrates a convoluted plot involving kidnapping and murder to try and fill the void left by Chorney and make a name for himself as the man who killed Kraven, or coerce the Kravinoffs into joining forces. This latter scheme is mirrored by Nikolai, who desires to rule the criminal underworld with his sons, leading to what’s essentially a war between rival mob gangs in a bid for greater glory. However, if you ask me, reimagining the Rhino into this role is a poor fit. I would’ve preferred to see Alonzo Lincoln/Tombstone in this role, with the Rhino replacing the Foreigner as his muscle/henchman, and possible have rewritten the script to weave Dr. Warren into the narrative more explicitly, but what do I know?

The Nitty-Gritty:
Kraven the Hunter is, fundamentally (somewhere beneath all the mess), a story about a son escaping the shadow of his abusive and totalitarian father. While part of young Sergei enjoyed his father’s approval, he was nevertheless disgusted by Nikolai’s treatment of Dmitri and his penchant for big game hunting. Having grown up emotionally and physically abused by his father, and having witnessed his brother get the same treatment or worse, Kraven is determined to not become the same kind of man as his father. To a degree, he accomplishes this (he becomes a morally grey vigilante, of sorts, rather than a ruthless crime boss) but his affinity for violence and desire to be seen as the Alpha Male among his peers echoes his father’s teachings. Naturally, Kraven rejects these comparisons and believes he’s doing good by taking out poachers and mob bosses, but his path inevitably intersects with Nikolai once more and he’s clearly disturbed by his similarities to his father. Dmitri couldn’t be more different from both men; he craves the approval Nikali shows Sergei and does everything he can to appease his father. Dmitri’s talents are in entertaining and mimicry rather than physical feats, wowing the patrons of his club with his pitch-perfect vocal talents and even earning a modicum of respect from his father, who appreciates Nikolai’s Tony Bennett impersonation. Despite a lifetime of abuse and mistreatment, and being beaten and having a finger cut off, Dmitri refuses to succumb to the Rhino’s torture or sell out his family to the irrational wannabe, though he’s stunned to learn that his brother is the fabled Hunter, which only adds to his insecurities and desire to carve his own legacy by the film’s end. Despite featuring many names associated with Spider-Man, Kraven the Hunter is very light on Spider-Man elements: the Daily Bugle appears a couple of times, Dr. Warren is name dropped, and it’s revealed that Kraven has an inexplicable and convenient and never explained fear of spiders. However, there’s no indication that a Spider-Man exists in this world or if it’s even connected to Sony’s other spin-off films.

Sadly, all the bloody violence and delicious abs in the world can’t excuse the poor CGI and editing.

While Kraven the Hunter is often a mess of clunky, clearly rerecorded dialogue and overdone clichés, the action on display is pretty good at times. The film is, sadly, populated with some of the worst CGI animals I’ve ever seen; the gigantic lion and the leopard that attack Kraven at different points are the worst offenders by far. When Kraven leaps into action, the violence is fast, bloody, and brutal, with him stabbing foes, slicing their throats open, and clamping bear traps to their heads! At one point, he sets traps for his pursuers that sees one guy get ripped in half crotch first, another take a machete to the head, and blood splattering across a bleak Russian forest. Kraven beats guys to death with his bare hands, easily breaks bones and manhandles multiple, even armed foes, and his skilled with knives, blades, and spears is readily apparent. Believing it dishonourable to use firearms and any weapons not made of the land or meticulously crafted, Kraven keeps a cache of blades and weapons at his sanctuary and on his person, subduing targets with blow darts and poisons and easily clambering up sheer surfaces with an animal grace. I’m not the biggest fan of or expert on Kraven but I do believe he’s often imbued with animal senses, spirits, and ferocity and that’s on full display here. Kraven often gallops about on all fours, tackles jeeps like a rhino, clings to purchases like a monkey, and has senses so keen that he can hear, smell, and see things no normal human could. This all adds to his abilities as a manhunter and in a fight, with him being swift enough to avoid gun fire and carpet bombs, durable enough to take a beating, and apparently strong enough to survive being buried under a bunch of stones and debris. Somehow, he’s so fleet footed that he can remain completely undetected even when standing right behind his foes and his eyes often glow an ethereal orange to show he can see in the dark or across vast distances. He’s not completely invulnerable, however. He succumbs to the Foreigner’s poison like any other man and is beaten close to death by the malicious mercenary, his life only spared by the timely intervention of Calypso. Dmitri also proves to be a vulnerability, one the Rhino doesn’t hesitate to exploit, and Kraven’s emotions often get the better of him where his brother and family are concerned.

A lacklustre showdown with a ridiculous villain leaves Kraven set for a sequel that’ll never happen.

Despite Kraven’s lauded and feared reputation, he struggles to piece together the paper-thin plot taking place around him and needs Calypso and the intel offered by his dying targets to figure out what the hell’s going on. Already angered that security footage that identifies him is doing the rounds, Kraven’s desire to shut down those actively seeking him out is exacerbated when Nikolai’s life of crime seemingly causes Dmitri’s kidnapping by would-be rival kingpin, the Rhino. When Dmitri and Kraven shoot down the Rhino’s offer to join forces, the Rhino organises a strike against Kraven on his home turf, a ridiculously poorly thought-out operation that leaves all his ill-equipped troops dead and Sytsevic forced to allow his transformation to take full effect. Transforming into a hulking man-rhino that, despite being comic accurate, looks laughably cartoonish, the Rhino fights Kraven amidst a buffalo stampede. Thanks to his impenetrable skin and augmented strength, the Rhino easily shrugs off Kraven’s blows and knives and pummels the Hunter, beating the piss out of him and looking to throttle him to death. However, Kraven spots the medicine line on the Rhino’s thick hide and rams a role into his stomach, then has the stampede trample the weak-ass villain to death. Although Kraven talks Dmitri out of executing the Rhino, Kraven has not hesitation about confronting his father, who released the video footage to coerce his estranged son into eliminating his competition, a revelation that leaves Nikolai being mauled by a wild bear courtesy of Kraven. The film then ends with Kraven being aghast to learn Dmitri has taken control of their father’s operation and undergone some “unorthodox” surgery of his own to assume the face of anyone he wishes at will. How Dr. Warren did this isn’t explained and quite how the Chameleon thinks he’ll fool anyone with his short stature is beyond me. I think a better reveal would’ve been that Dmitri was posing as Nikolai and was a bad guy all along, manipulating events to seize power and using fake masks and practical augmentations rather than what I assume is either a nanotech or some vague bioengineered tampering to steal people’s identities. Oh, and Kraven gets his signature jacket, made out of the hide of the lion he failed to kill, as a parting gift from his father.

The Summary:
I wasn’t expecting much, if anything, from Kraven the Hunter. I’m really not a fan of the character and would have little interest if he showed up in a Spider-Man movie, so giving him a solo film seems moronic and pointless to me. Luckily, I can say that I enjoyed Kraven the Hunter more than Morbius or Madame Web, but not by much and that’s hardly a high bar to clear and the film’s flaws mean it’s still not getting higher than a generous two-star rating. This rating is based purely on Aaron Taylor-Johnson’s performance, which I did enjoy, and the brutal, bloody action sequences, which give the film an edge sadly not afforded to the Venom movies as swearing and strong, bloody violence would tip them into 18-rated affairs. Aaron Taylor-Johnson does look great in the role, and I did enjoy the depiction of Kraven’s powers; it seemed a lot of his actions and stunts were practical, too, which was appreciated. However, it made the poor CGI stand out even more. I obviously don’t expect the actors to be wrestling with real lions and such but surely CGI has progressed to the point where they can be rendered more convincingly? The Rhino suffers greatly from this, too. Clearly a rushed, last-minute inclusion, the Rhino is so awful here and looks so janky that I honestly prefer the mech-suit version we got previously; at least that’s somewhat believable! Add in pointless characters like the Foreigner, a strange and ill-fitting interpretation of the Rhino, and some horrendous and distracting ADR, and you have a film that feels like it was butchered by the budget and the editing process. It feels like many scenes were left on the cutting room floor, especially those featuring Calypso and Kraven’s life between hunts, making for an awkwardly paced and disjointed affair. It’s also disappointing that it’s not made clear where Kraven the Hunter fits in Sony’s spin-off films, if anywhere. However, even if the film had been better in these regards, I would still be unimpressed and annoyed at the idea of giving Kraven a solo movie. And, if it had been a Spider-Man film featuring Kraven, I would’ve been equally disappointed as I just don’t care about the character. Thus, Kraven the Hunter was doomed to fail for me and I cannot understand, for the life of me, who this mess was made for.

My Rating:

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Could Be Better

Did you enjoy Kraven the Hunter? If so…what’s the matter with you? What did you think to Aaron Taylor-Johnson’s performance and the depiction of Kraven’s powers? Do you agree that the film felt rush, especially regarding Dmitri’s story arc? What did you think to the Rhino and his eventual full reveal? Did you also think that the film felt butchered in the editing room? Are you a fan of the character in general (and, if so, again…why?) and would you like to see Kraven return in some capacity? What Spider-Man villain would you like to see get a standalone movie? I’d love to know your opinions of Kraven the Hunter, so leave them below and be sure to check out my other Spider-Man and Marvel content.

Movie Night [Doomsday]: Deep Impact

Dr. K3 Comments

Over the years, there have been many theories about when the world will end but one of the more prevalent was the mistaken belief that doomsday would befall us on December 21st 2012 based on the Mayan calendar ending on this day. Of course, not only did this not happen but it wasn’t even based on any actual fact to begin with. Nevertheless, I figured today was a good day to celebrate this popular concept.

Released: 8 May 1998
Director: Mimi Leder
Distributor: Paramount Pictures / DreamWorks Pictures
Budget: $80 million
Stars: Elijah Wood, Téa Leoni, Robert Duvall, Morgan Freeman, Ron Eldard, Leelee Sobieski, and Vanessa Redgrave

The Plot:
When journalist Jenny Lerner (Leoni) badgers United States President Tom Beck (Freeman) about a White House scandal, the world discovers that teenager Leo Beiderman (Wood) spotted a world-ending comet heading for Earth and veteran astronaut Captain Spurgeon “Fish” Tanner’s (Duvall) leads a mission to destroy it.

The Background:
The origins of Deep Impact can apparently be traced back to the late-seventies, when producers Richard D. Zanuck and David Brown proposed remaking When Worlds Collide (Maté, 1951) to Paramount Pictures, a project which stalled for many years. Things took a turn when they tried to get Steven Spielberg involved and he combined the idea with his hopes of adapting The Hammer of God (Clarke, 1993), though he was unable to direct due to his commitments to Amistad (Spielberg, 1997). By the time Mimi Leder took over as director, the film’s production and release coincided with that of Armageddon (Bay, 1998), a similarly-themed disaster movie that was directly compared to Deep Impact by the press. Author Arthur C. Clarke was left disgruntled when he was omitted from the film’s credits after influencing the concept, CNN apparently refused to be involved, leading to MSNBC lending their name to the narrative, and Leder claimed on the DVD commentary that the budget didn’t allow for the production to show perspectives from outside the United States. Real world scientists and astronauts were reportedly brought onboard as consultants and the film’s harrowing scenes of destruction were handled by legendary effects studio Industrial Light & Magic, who used both traditional miniatures and model work alongside cutting edge CGI water rendering to depict the comet’s disastrous impact. Deep Impact proved a commercial success with its near $350 million box office and held the record for the biggest opening weekend for a female-directed film for some ten years. Reviews, however, were mixed, with some praising the brooding tone and others criticising the wooden performances. Still, Deep Impact is generally regarded as being more scientifically accurate than Armageddon and has been considered to be the more nuanced and mature of the two productions.

The Review:
If I had £1 for every time Hollywood released a world-ending asteroid movie in 1998…I’d have £2. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice, right? On paper, Deep Impact and Armageddon have the same premise (the Earth is threatened by an extinction-level event) and a group of astronauts try to save it with nuclear weapons, but their presentation couldn’t be more different. For me, I’ve always preferred Armageddon and have always seen Deep Impact as a bit of a cheap knock-off so, spoilers, I don’t rate this one too highly. Unlike Armageddon, which largely takes place on the surface of its ridiculously oversized, planet-killing asteroid and in the control centre of the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA), Deep Impact follows a handful of characters from different walks of life and showcases the comet’s threat from different perspectives. The first of these we’re introduced to is aspiring young astronomer Leo Beiderman, the first to spot the comet when it’s about a year away from reaching our solar system. Although his girlfriend, Sarah Hotchner (Sobieski), teases him that he’s simply misidentified an existing star, his discovery is verified as not only true but a significant threat by professional astronomer Doctor Marcus Wolf (Charles Martin Smith), who then promptly dies racing to alert the authorities to the danger. Quite how anyone learns of the comet in the year gap that then passes isn’t explained. It’s hinted that documents were recovered from the crash, though Dr. Wolf’s car went up in a massive ball of flames so I’m not sure how the government learned of the comet or came to the erroneous conclusion that Leo also died in the same accident. Still, the United States government spends the next year covertly preparing for the comet’s arrival, secretly colluding with the Russians to construct a space craft and nuclear bombs capable of deflecting it and also digging out caves in case the worst should happen. These contingency plans don’t bring much comfort to Secretary of the Treasury Alan Rittenhouse (James Cromwell), who resigns to be with his family and make his own preparations for what could potentially be the end of all life on Earth.

Ambitious and obnoxious reporter Jenny discovers the Earth is facing impending doom.

Rittenhouse’s resignation raises questions over at MSNBC, where ambitious journalist Jenny Lerner investigates the story, believing it to first be a dead-end gig compared to landing the coveted anchor chair and then a convoluted cover-up for an illicit scandal in the White House. However, after questioning Rittenhouse, Jenny’s puzzled to find him stockpiling food and referring to his assumed mistress, Ellie, as “E.L.E”. Though frustrated at being lumbered with the boring story and amazed at Rittenhouse’s ego, Jenny’s terrified when she’s suddenly accosted by the Secret Service and brought to the President himself, Tom Beck, a stern man who remains tight-lipped about what, exactly, the E.L.E. is but offers to advance her career by giving her a prime spot at the press conference where he reveals the truth. Desperate to be taken seriously, Jenny jumps at the chance, ignoring minor concerns like national security and public panic, but even she is left speechless at the announcement of an Extinction-Level Event (hence “E.L.E.”) and the plan to defend the planet. From there, Jenny earns herself the anchor spot and becomes the face of the Messiah’s mission, delivering bland, robotic addresses to the public as only the dull and lifeless Téa Leoni can. Jenny’s given some edge in her dramatic relationship with her parents. Her mother, Robin (Redgrave) later takes her own life after learning she’s ineligible for the cave sanctuary and donating all her worldly goods to the preservation project. Jenny’s estranged father, Jason (Maximilian Schell), starts the film elated to have just married Chloe (Rya Kihlstedt), a woman only two years Jenny’s senior, and desperate to reconnect with his daughter, only to then be accused of being a neglectful father and finally make peace with Jenny as she does something selfless for a change and gives up her spot in the cave to be comforted by her dad. As this comes in the face of the best moment of the film (the city destroyed tsunami), it’s a very emotional moment but I just don’t care for Téa Leoni. Jenny’s an insufferable character, focused only on her career and constantly lashing out like a child, which to be fair ties into her eventual growth when she realises the end is nigh, but her delivery is so wooden and she looks so bored all the time that I have a hard time buying her as this charismatic and developed news anchor.

While Leo’s a bit of a dud, President Beck is a commanding and surprisingly vulnerable presence.

Sadly, Elijah Wood isn’t much better as Leo and seems out of his depth here. Leo is basically a blank slate, walking around in perpetual bewilderment at having a world-ending comet named after him and being celebrated as a hero at his high school. He doesn’t really do all that much until the third act, when he and his family are inexplicably selected to be taken to safety and he coerces Sarah into marrying him so her and her family can be saved, too. However, an administrative cock up sees the Hotchner’s names missing from the list, forcing Leo to journey all the way back to his hometown to rescue Sarah. As the smaller half of the comet, Beiderman, streams overhead and then crashes into the sea, Leo finds Sarah and her family and her parents, Vicky (Denise Crosby) and Chuck (Gary Werntz), force them to get their baby to higher ground. Leo provides more of a grounded perspective on the incoming comet, but the film doesn’t really follow him beyond the start and the third act, meaning he’s stuck with one-dimensional characterisation as a good kid who’s a little overwhelmed and desperate to get Sarah to safety. Instead, the Beidermans and the Hotchners are just another set of characters who spend their time anxiously watching Jenny’s news reports on the comet’s trajectory and the Messiah’s mission to intercept it. Indeed, much of Deep Impact focuses on people just staring at the television, which I guess speaks to the passive helplessness of the masses against this incredible external threat but doesn’t make for thrilling viewing. President Beck makes several addresses ensuring his citizens that “life will go on” and, thanks to Morgan Freeman’s peerless gravitas and delivery, comes across as a strong and trustworthy leader. He’s tough but fair, considers all viewpoints, and plans for both the best- and worst-case scenarios. At the same time, he has a vulnerability to him, one that becomes more evident as each mission meets failure. His attire becomes more formal, changing from a dress suit to a simple rolled up shirt, and his cadence becomes more severe as he prepares the nation for calamity. It’s a stirring performance that really belongs in a better film, and yet the cynic in me wonders what world leader would ever dare be so honest to his constituents!

The Messiah crew are the planet’s last hope to destroy the lacklustre comet.

Like Armageddon, Deep Impact also follows a group of astronauts in a specially built “rocket”. The mission is crewed not by hard and hardy oil drillers but by fully certified astronauts: Commander Oren Monash (Eldard) leads the mission, Andrea “Andy” Baker (Mary McCormack) is the pilot, Doctor Gus Partenza (Jon Favreau) is the chatterbox medical officer, and Mark Simo (Blair Underwood) is the navigator. They even have a token Russian cosmonaut, Colonel Mikhail “Mick” Tulchinsky (Aleksandr Baluev), who’s in charge of the explosives, and are joined by veteran astronaut Captain Spurgeon “Fish” Tanner. While the youngsters respect Fish, they see his appointment as a publicity stunt as he hasn’t been properly trained for the mission. However, Fish soon shuts them down since he’s the only one to log actual space flight time (he even walked on the Moon back in the day) as opposed to training on “videogame” flight simulators. While most of the crew are painfully one-note, they set aside their personal differences once the mission’s underway and perform their duties to a high standard. It’s just not particularly interesting and certainly nowhere near as dramatic as in Armageddon. The Messiah might appear more realistic and the space scenes are far less exaggerated, but it’s weird seeing the crew spend all their time in casual clothing rather than jump suits and their initial tactic is no less questionable than in Armageddon. Instead of one big bomb, the Messiah drills a series of nuclear warheads into Wolf- Beiderman but, as many have suggested, all this does is split the comet into two parts. They also take so long to set their explosives that they’re exposed to the Sun, blinding Oren, sending Gus flying into space courtesy of an explosive release of gas, and leaving the Messiah dangerously low on fuel. The crew are then largely forgotten until the final act, where they seek to outdo Bruce Willis and concoct a suicidal plan to vaporise the larger half of the comet which, again, is a surprisingly emotional scene but just lands flatter than Armageddon because the presentation is so tedious. Even the comet, Wolf-Beiderman, isn’t as visually impressive as Dottie. Sure, it’s more realistic (both visually and in terms of size) and looms in the background, getting closer and more dangerous as time passes, but it just looks like a big ball of ice and lacks any menacing character in its design.

The Nitty-Gritty:
Deep Impact approaches the end of the world as a story of hope and humanity. The aware of the comet, President Beck makes plans to knock it off course or destroy it as a priority and to prepare for the preservation of human life as a secondary (but equally important) objective. While Rittenhouse doubts the Messiah’s success, President Beck is confident in the mission succeeding. He’s equally confident that his strike missiles will deter the comet; and, finally, he’s even more confident that the million people he randomly selects to be brought to safety will rebuild human society. As pragmatic as President Beck is, his faith in these contingencies is flawed. The Messiah was never going to succeed by drilling so shallowly into the asteroid and his projections about how long it’ll take for the comet’s devastation to recede seem woefully optimistic. He (or rather, presumably, his advisors) estimate it’ll take just two years for the dust to settle and for the survivors to rebuild. For comparison, it took something like 300,000 years for the Earth to recover from the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs! He doesn’t seem to have factored in potential fallout, the shifting of landmasses, or the widespread destruction of resources. Instead, he’s literally built an underground Noah’s Ark and placed his faith in a higher power to guide them, which exposes chinks in his leadership armour. MSNBC present the mission from a purely factual approach, bringing in experts to talk with Jenny about specific aspects of the mission and what it means if it succeeds or fails. As the situation grows more dire, Jenny’s stoic mask finally slips when she reads Gus’s obituary and delivers the specifics on the lottery, which excludes older citizens like her mother. Rather than descending into abject fear and panic, everyone we see continues their lives as normal. MSNBC and the White House staff work right up into zero hour and only start evacuating just before Beiderman hits! While we see a mass exodus in the face of this danger, it’s obvious that most of these people are doomed. Jenny and Vicky react to this selflessly, giving up their safety and their child to ensure young life has a chance to survive, and President Beck’s first address after “the water’s [recede]” is one of hope and renewed appreciation for the planet.

The devastating destruction is the film’s biggest selling point and most impressive moment.

Like any good disaster movie, the main selling point of Deep Impact is the devastation caused by Beiderman’s impact. Unfortunately, whereas Armageddon opened with a meteor shower and destroyed both Paris and Shanghai, there is no Earthly destruction until the film’s final act. Before then, it’s all character drama and staring at television screens but we do get some tension when the Messiah crew touchdown on Wolf-Beiderman. Though the comet isn’t as hostile as Dottie, the crew only have a few hours to set their explosives before the Sun rises and combusts the comet’s surface. This leads to a distressing scene where Oren is blinded, Mark is injured, and Gus is blasted into space. While Mick pleads with Fish to go after their colleague, it’s ruled out since they don’t have the fuel for a rescue operation and Gus is left to suffer one of the worst fates imaginable. To make matters worse, the bombs don’t even work and instead cause a smaller section of the comet to split off. When the President’s missile strike fails to have any impact on the approaching threat, our Earth-bound protagonists can only watch in horror as Beiderman splashes down and kicks up a tidal wave large enough to suck the water from land masses and engulf entire cities. After finally reconciling with her father, Jenny faces this destructive torrent head on, comforted by Jason’s embrace, and the waters wash over the world. We only see the destruction of New York City, unfortunately, but man is it worth it. The wave ploughs through skyscrapers and national landmarks like the Twin Towers and the Statue of Liberty, obliterating anyone unfortunate enough to still be on the streets and wiping away forests, homes, and entire towns. Leo and Sarah are left running from the incoming waters, which wash away the gridlock of traffic (that includes Sarah’s parents) and drive them, exhausted and devastated, to higher ground. In the finale, President Beck gives an overview of the impact’s devastation, which also tore through the United States Capitol, but we sadly don’t see any other countries or cities affected by the wave. Still, the visual rendition of the impact and the destruction is distressing and easily the best part of the movie.

The Messiah‘s heroic sacrifice spares the world from total destruction…and the water’s receded.

After failing to destroy Wolf-Beiderman, the Messiah is left with two choices: risk suffocation or irradiation either coasting or rushing back to Earth. At Oren’s suggestion, they accelerate back home, only to find that they’re far from a high priority in the face of Beiderman’s arrival. Still, Fish runs some calculations and suggests detonating the remainder of their payload into the large chasm left behind when Beiderman separated from Wolf (something I feel they could’ve done a lot sooner, like when they were right by the comet!) Unfortunately, this is a one-way trip as they don’t have the time, fuel, or resources to land and deposit the bombs, and they all remorsefully agree to sacrifice themselves to give the world a chance. Luckily, they’re close to home so they successfully contact NASA flight director Otis “Mitch” Hefter (Kurtwood Smith), who’s also inexplicably still at his station, and arrange to say their goodbyes to their loved ones. Again, the similarities to Armageddon as astounding; instead of one heroic figure saying farewell to his daughter, we have a handful of them tearing up to their wives and newborns and Fish delivering a poignant goodbye to his late wife. The crew then strap in, acknowledge their appreciation for each other, and meet their end in the most anti-climatic way possible as Wolf simply shatters into tiny fragments upon impact. These then harmlessly burn up in the atmosphere and end the comet’s threat, though again I’m left disappointed by how visually unfulfilling this depiction is. Wolf also appeared a lot closer to Earth than Dottie, meaning a fair amount of nuclear fallout probably swept over the shattered remains of our world but it’s okay…the water’s receded! Lives and homes and entire nations were swept away but it’s okay…the water’s receded! The Earth suffers the greatest calamity in thousands of years and humanity is seemingly united in their efforts to rebuild, never mind how many resources were lost to the waters or how low a priority building the White House has to be. But it’s okay…the water’s receded.

The Summary:
I feel like I’m being way too harsh on Deep Impact. It’s not that I don’t enjoy the film…I just prefer Armageddon. Sure, Deep Impact is more realistic and the sets, the science, and the presentation are far more true to life than Michael Bay’s style over substance approach. However, while I’m not much of a Bay fan, at least his effort was visually engaging, and I never felt bored watching Armageddon. Deep Impact drags along at a snail’s pace, building tension and anticipation for its show stealing scenes of destruction but populating its runtime with dull, obnoxious, and forgettable characters. Téa Leoni is the worst of the bunch; I’ll give her props for making Jenny such an aggravating character, but watching Leoni is like watching grass grow. She’s so wooden and seems bored the entire time, meaning I just don’t care about anything she says or her character arc. Elijah Wood isn’t much better, unfortunately, relying on his doe-eyed charm to carry him through the film’s dramatic moments and failing to deliver a compelling character. Unsurprisingly, Morgan Freeman and Robert Duvall carry this film. President Beck may be the best example of a United States President we’ve ever gotten, being confidant and authoritative but also humane and vulnerable, while Fish brings vigour and expertise to his otherwise mediocre crewmates. Of course, the big wave is the main reason to watch Deep Impact and it really is worth it; splice this scene into Armageddon and you’d have the best of both worlds! I also enjoyed the more emotional moments and the poignant message off hope the film ends on, but Deep Impact is quite a chore for me and lacks the visual and dramatic punch of its bigger, louder, and ultimately more enjoyable counterpart.

My Rating:

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Pretty Good

Are you a fan of Deep Impact? How do you feel it compares to Armageddon and other disaster films? Did you prefer the film’s more realistic approach? Which of the characters was your favourite and what did you think to Téa Leoni and Elijah Wood’s performances? Were you impressed by the massive tidal wave? How important is scientific accuracy and realism to you in disaster films like this? How are you celebrating the end of the world today? Whatever you think about Deep Impact, disaster films, and overblown predictions of the end of the world, go ahead and drop a comment down below.

Movie Night [Friday the 13th]: Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives

Dr. K7 Comments

Long considered to be an unlucky day due to superstitions involving the number thirteen and religious connotations, Friday the 13th is perhaps equally as well-known as being the title for a long-running series of slasher movies. As a result, this is clearly the best opportunity to take a look at the Friday the 13th (Various, 1980 to 2009) horror series and to commemorate this unlucky and dreaded date.

Released: 1 August 1986
Director: Tom McLoughlin
Distributor: Paramount Pictures
Budget: $3 million
Stars: Thom Mathews, C.J. Graham, Jennifer Cooke, Renée Jones, Kerry Noonan, and David Kagen

The Plot:
After being released from a sanatorium, grown-up Tommy Jarvis (Matthews) attempts to cremate the body of deceased serial killer Jason Voorhees (Graham). However, an errant lightning bolt resurrects Jason and only Tommy holds the key to stopping him.

The Background:
After the success of John Carpenter’s Halloween(Carpenter, 1978), which basically gave birth to horror’s “slasher” sub-genre, Friday the 13th (Cunningham, 1980) proved a surprising box office success. Although producer/director Sean S. Cunningham distanced himself from the franchise, which was plagued by negative reviews, Friday the 13thPart 2 (Miner, 1981) and Friday the 13thPart 3 (ibid, 1982) were financial successes. Yet, Paramount executives were embarrassed by their association with the franchise and planned to close the book on Jason with Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (Zito, 1984). A box office gross of $33 million made The Final Chapter a commercial success, meaning this “Final Chapter” was nothing of the sort. Although Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (Steinmann, 1985) seemed to be setting up a new killer, its disastrous critical reception and audience backlash convinced the producers to bring Jason back the following year. Director Tom McLoughlin was given free rein to accomplish this and took inspiration from the classic Universal Monster movies to reimagine Jason as an undead monster. He also consciously shied away from nudity, anticipated censorship struggles, and adopted more comedic slant. Despite this new direction, star John Shepard was approached to return as Tommy but turned it down, allowing horror alumni Thom Mathews to step into (and take over) the role. Initially, stuntman Dan Bradley was cast as Jason but he was replaced by former soldier C.J. Graham after the producers were dissatisfied with his performance. Ironically, despite returning Jason to the franchise, Jason Lives actually made less than A New Beginning, totalling $19.4 million worldwide, leading producers to consider a horror crossover for their next instalment. Incidentally, Jason Lives was also met with mixed reviews; while some labelled it as predictable and nonsensical, others have called it one of the best in the entire franchise.

The Review:
I’ve mentioned it before, but I was not a fan of horror movies as a child. I would hide behind my comics and often had nightmares after catching even a glimpse of the genre’s most iconic killers. Because of this, I was a late bloomer when it came to the Friday the 13th franchise and the first entry that I ever saw was Jason Lives, though I was acutely aware of Jason’s status as a mainstream horror icon. Jason Lives actually went a long way to helping desensitise me to horror, with its tongue-in-cheek presentation and over the top aesthetic that made it more entertaining than terrifying. However, I remember watching it with only the vaguest knowledge of the franchise and being a little confused by the opening sequence. At the time, I genuinely thought Tommy was remembering Jason murdering his family and that the echoing cries of “Die! Die! Die!” were from Jason rather than the young Tommy! Obviously, I now know better but I think that’s a fun anecdote, almost as much fun as the film’s opening sequence, which mirrors the opening of A New Beginning but expands upon it. It now takes place in canon, for one thing, against the background of a stormy night. For another, it has Tommy (now recast and reimagined to be far less volatile) be the one who digs up Jason’s grave. Like his predecessor (the canonicity of which is up for debate), Tommy is traumatised by his encounter with Jason but, while one could argue he’s a bit dull compared to John Shepard’s unstable ass-kicker, he exhibits an intense drive to not only confirm for himself that Jason is dead, but to destroy his body forever. To that end, he risks reincarceration to return to Crystal Lake (now rechristened Forest Green) alongside his reluctant and anxious friend, Allen Hawes (Ron Palillo), with Jason’s mask in his possession in order to cremate his remains and set his demons to rest once and for all.

Tommy desperately tries to make amends after accidentally resurrecting Jason.

Although it’s said that Tommy suffers from hallucinations of Jason, this isn’t an aspect we see here. Instead, Tommy hopes that destroying Jason’s body will stop the visions and his recurring nightmares, but he’s driven into rage upon the sight of Jason’s rotting corpse and reliving his childhood and stabs the worm-infested remains repeatedly with a metal fence pole. Unfortunately, Tommy accidentally provides Jason with the means to return to life (something he could’ve never predicted) and is thus responsible for the mayhem and murder Jason causes throughout the film. Although Tommy tries to get ahead of this by warning the local sheriff, Mike Garris (Kagen), he is met with hostility and scepticism because of his maniacal behaviour and background. Frustrated and branded a nut-job, Tommy can only sit in his cell and wait to be transferred back to his psychiatric hospital since Sheriff Garris is determined to help Forest Green move on from Jason, Crystal Lake, and the horrors associated with both. In a desperate attempt to prove his story, Tommy escapes custody when being escorted out of town, only to find the cemetery groundskeeper, Martin (Bob Larkin), has covered Jason’s body up. Tommy is even implicated in the murders that follow since Sheriff Garris refuses to believe that Jason has returned and finds it far more likely that Tommy is going on a killing spree. Burdened by guilt and desperate to atone for his actions, Tommy is frustrated at the lack of support he receives, especially considering his unique insight into Jason. Where John Shepard would attack anyone who provoked him with an explosive violence and was sullen and withdrawn, Thom Matthews presents Tommy as intelligent, flirtatious, and determined to put Jason down for good, by any means necessary, even if it means employing quasi-supernatural means to counter Jason’s otherworldly force. Although it’s disappointing that we didn’t see Tommy take over as the new killer, Jason Lives does play with this a little bit. Sheriff Garris is convinced that Tommy is behind the recent killings and even refers to him as Jason at one point, though Tommy remains the pure-hearted, if flawed, hero of the piece.

Ballsy Megan and some colourful supporting characters actually make me care about Jason’s victims.

While locked up, Tommy catches the eye of Sheriff Garris’s playful, rebellious, and provocative daughter, Megan (Cooke). One of the new breed of camp counsellors, Megan and her friends – responsible Paula Mott (Noonan), cackling Alice Cooper aficionado Carter “Cort” Andrews (Tom Fridley), and prankster Elizabeth “Sissy” Baker (Jones) – are left to look after the young kids who’ve arrived for summer camp. However, they have no clue what they’re supposed to do since head counsellors Darren Robinson (Tony Goldwyn) and Paula’s sister, Lizbeth (Nancy McLoughlin), fail to show up due to a slight case of death. Sheriff Garris isn’t immediately bothered by Megan’s plight and is more concerned with keeping her away from Tommy, who warns of Jason at every opportunity. Since she apparently likes a bad boy, Megan openly flirts with Tommy right in front of her father and willingly goes out of her way to assist him, even briefly hiding him for her dad by thrusting his head between her legs in her prized convertible. Megan was raised believing Jason was nothing but a legend but, while she and Sissy are intrigued by Tommy’s wild claims about Jason’s return, they find the idea of caring for the crop of screaming, cynical kids a far more pressing and terrifying threat. The teens try their best to entertain the kids but they struggle to impress or interest the pessimistic youngsters. It doesn’t help that they’re distracted by Darren and Lizbeth’s absence or that Cort takes off with the rambunctious Nicola “Nikki” Parsley (Darcy DeMoss). Still, while the wannabe counsellors are as painfully cliché as ever, I found them enjoyable. With the exception of Paula, they all exhibit a fair amount of personality, meaning it was genuinely distressing when Jason tore through them. I also enjoyed the cantankerous Sheriff Garris, who’s just trying to protect his daughter and maintain peace after years of bloodshed. His aggravation and aggression towards Tommy is perfectly reasonable, but I liked how he protected Megan from Jason in the finale, even though it meant his death. Finally, Jason Lives impresses by including a bunch of enjoyable (if disposable) tertiary characters to up the body count. The company executives paintballing in the woods are surprisingly entertaining with their banter and annoyance, Darren and Lizbeth exhibit an awareness of the genre and situation (though it does little to save them), and even Martin makes an impression by being a bitter, paranoid drunk.

Undead and more powerful than ever, Jason make a dramatic and entertaining return to form.

Although A New Beginning stated that Jason had been cremated, this is ignored (and the explanation was sadly excised) and Jason begins the film as a festering, ghastly corpse. While Jason exhibited superhuman strength, stamina, and dexterity in the previous films, to the point where he was an almost supernatural force, Jason Lives explicitly reimagines him as an undead and nigh-unstoppable killing machine. Resurrected by lightning, Jason immediately showcases his newfound, unnatural strength by ripping Hawes’ heart out and stalking the surrounding woodland with almost a brazen arrogance. In previous films, Jason’s appearance was often hidden or accomplished through first-person perspectives that built up to his eventual full reveal and dominance of the final act. While some aspects of this remain in Jason Lives, Jason gets far more screen time than ever before and is unquestionably positioned as the star. Jason Lives adds a surprising humanity to Jason, especially considering he’s a mindless, rage-filled zombie now. For the first time, the local summer camp is populated by little children but Jason never attempts to harm them. Young Nancy (Courtney Vickery) is terrified when she sees him, and Jason comes dangerously close to her, but he seems more curious and perhaps sympathetic towards them. Indeed, the only reason he even comes near them is when he’s pursuing his more traditional quarry and I liked the implication that he feels a kinship towards children, even though he was clearly trying to kill young Tommy in The Final Chapter. Although we never get a good look at his mangled, rotting visage, this is one of my favourite looks for Jason. He dons his iconic hockey mask and sports dirty, dishevelled attire that he progressively adds to throughout the film as he takes Tommy’s gloves and a tool belt from the ill-fated paintballers. I also appreciated that Jason used a variety of means to dispatch his quarry, including the metal pole Tommy stuck him with and his immense undead strength rather than relying solely on his trademark machete.

The Nitty-Gritty:
While I fully admit to being biased towards Jason Lives and consider it one of the best in the franchise, the film boasts perhaps the best score of all the Friday the 13th films. Harry Manfredini returns as the composer, delivering the classic “Ki-ki-ki-ma-ma-ma!” theme and bolstering it was a truly haunting, almost sing-song melody that creates a haunting atmosphere and some solid, impactful orchestral whenever Jason appears on screen to really give him a bombastic presentation. Jason Lives is full of cheeky nods to horror cinema: Jason’s resurrection evokes Frankenstein (Whale, 1931), as does “Karloff’s General Store”; there’s name-drops to Friday the 13th creator Sean S. Cunningham and the great John Carpenter, and little Nancy and her terrified prayer surely reference A Nightmare on Elm Street (Craven, 1984). Oddly, horror isn’t the only genre referenced in Jason Lives as the opening titles include a parody of the James Bond gun barrel sequence. Indeed, parody (or, at least, comedic metacommentary) is a prominent aspect of the film: Martin addresses the camera and comments on the youth of the day, the immortal Alice Cooper’s music features prominently throughout the film; and we get such amusing scenes as Jason slamming a victim into a tree and leaving a bloody smiley face in the bark and a desperate woman offering Jason cash and her American Express card floating uselessly in a puddle next to her body. There’s just a sense of playful self-awareness throughout the film that really leans into the idea of Jason being a mainstream icon. While you could argue that this diminishes Jason’s terrifying aura, there are plenty of shots and moments that frame him as a horrifying threat and it’s fun actually rooting for him rather than against him. He’s like the straight man to a handful of more ludicrous characters, which actually allows him to be more dangerous and unhinged than ever.

Jason’s newfound power results in some fun, unique, and brutal kills.

If there’s one downside to Jason Lives, it’s that it’s very light on sex and nudity. We get one scene where Cort is getting it on with Nikki but it’s extremely tame and Nikki doesn’t even take her shirt off. Luckily, the film makes up for it was some fun and surprisingly gory kills. Jason wastes no time asserting himself and making the most of his ridiculous new strength. He rips Hawes’ heart out within the first ten minutes and takes to the forest, metal pole in hand, encountering the lost counsellors, whom he first intimidates and then impales with his pole. Jason (played by Dan Bradley for this one scene) increases his body count considerably when he encounters five corporate executives paintballing the forest (with three of them already helpfully wearing bandanas that read “DEAD”). He rips angry sexist Burt Dennenbrough’s (Wallace Merck) arm off, acquiring his machete, scores three kills in one when he beheads Katie Rice (Ann Ryerson) and siblings Stan (Matthew Faison) and Larry Irving (Alan Blumenfeld) with one swipe. Of course, not every kill is as memorable as I’d like thanks, as always, to censorship. Sissy’s head twist and decapitation is sadly tame, and Martin and lovers Steven Halavex (Roger Rose) and Annette Edwards (Cynthia Kania) are offed in disappointingly lame fashion. Yet, on the plus side, bland Paula ends up splattered all over in the inside of a cabin. Cort and Nikki’s ends are equally impressive, with Nikki having her face rammed through the RV wall and Cort being stabbed right through the head, leading to a fantastic shot of Jason standing triumphantly atop the flaming wreckage. Easily the best kills come in the film’s final act where Jason crushes Officer Pappas’ (Michael Swan) head (thankfully with no lame-ass 3D eye popping effect) and then folds Sheriff Garris top to tail, snapping his spine and leaving him a mangled mess right before her daughter’s eyes.

With a great effort, Tommy and Megan manage to trap Jason beneath the lake and end his threat…

Since Jason has literally returned from the dead and is a walking zombie this time around, he’s even more impervious to physical harm than ever. He shrugs off a shovel to the back of the head, rips limbs from bodies, barely registers gunshots and easily pops right back up after being blasted by a shotgun. Thus, stopping Jason this time requires a far more unique approach than just hacking his head in, so Tommy researches the occult to figure out how to dispose of his nightmarish enemy. Despite constant opposition from Sheriff Garris, and being labelled as a psychotic murderer, Tommy receives help from horny, rebellious Megan and acquires the supplies he needs to enact his plan. Unfortunately, a large part of this plan involves luring Jason into the open, which puts both him and Megan in considerable danger. With all her friends dead, her father and his deputies dead, and the little kids terrified out of their minds, Megan almost meets her own end when Jason tries to crush her head with his bare hands. However, he quickly forgets about her when challenged by Tommy. Clearly recognising his enemy’s voice, Jason willing pursues him into the lake, where Tommy waits with a chain attached to a boulder and surrounded by a ring of fire. While this seems like an oddly practical and far less supernatural solution than Tommy’s reading implied, Tommy wraps the chain around Jason’s neck but not before the undead killer trashes the boat. Although weighed down by the rock, Jason drags Tommy under and throttles him, seemingly killing him, so Megan swims out to rescue him. Although she almost suffers the same fate, she gets the boat’s outboard motor running and (despite the inconsistencies between shots and the distance between Jason and the blade) slices the propeller into Jason’s neck, apparently killing him once more. Once back on shore, Megan desperately and haphazardly manages to revive Tommy (conveniently Jason didn’t crush his neck) and he breathes a sigh of relief knowing Jason is finally in Hell once more…unaware that the monster still lives, trapped beneath the lake, burning with hatred and waiting to rise once more!

The Summary:
As I said, I’m biased but Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives is still one of my favourites in the franchise, alongside The Final Chapter and the surprisingly brutal remake. I love how meta the film is, how tongue-in-cheek it approaches the material, and how it unapologetically knows exactly what it is: mindless shlock horror made to appeal to the masses. Jason Lives really has fun with the traditional slasher formula, commenting and playing with it and never taking itself too seriously, which was the shot in the arm the series needed after not just the last film but also falling victim to repetition. It’s outrageous to think that this once grounded, semi-realistic horror series now features a full-blown zombie killer, but it really works. Jason’s new undead abilities allow him to take centre stage and be the horror icon everyone wanted to see, and the film is a celebration of his iconography after trying to kill and replace him in the last two films. While it’s still clearly been censored, Jason Lives features some fun and unique kills with a fair amount of blood and Jason is continually framed as both a feature and a terrifying villain, especially in the enraged brutality and renewed aggression of his actions and stature. While Thom Mathews is admittedly quite dull and Tommy loses much of the edge he had in the last film, I think he did a good job as Jason’s more pure-hearted opposite, and I liked how he was treated as a pariah and a poison rather than the only one capable of stopping further bloodshed. Add to that a rocking soundtrack courtesy of Alice Cooper, some surprisingly memorable supporting characters, fun parodies and Easter Eggs to horror cinema and other genres, and you have a bombastic return to form for cinema’s most notorious masked madman! Entertaining from start to finish, Jason Lives is the perfect horror to slap on with some mates, a few drinks and snacks, and just have fun celebrating this long-running franchise. It set a new standard for Friday the 13th movies, one that not many after were able to live up to, and remains an absolute favourite of mine to this day.

My Rating:

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Great Stuff

Are you a fan of Friday the 13thVI: Jason Lives? Do you consider it one of the stronger entries or were you put off by the change in direction? What did you think to Thom Matthews’ portrayal of Tommy and the way Jason returned? Which of the new characters was your favourite and which death scene entertained you the most? Do you think the series should’ve tried using Tommy as the killer or do you think it was the right decision to bring Jason back? Which Friday the 13th movie is your favourite? Do you consider Friday the 13th to be unlucky? Are you watching a Friday the 13th movie today? Whatever your thoughts on Friday the 13th (the movie, franchise, and day), go ahead and leave them down below.

Back Issues: The Amazing Spider-Man #15

Dr. K1 Comment

Story Title: “Kraven the Hunter!”
Published: 12 May 1964 (cover-dated: August 1964)
Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Steve Ditko

The Background:
After his success with the Fantastic Four, Marvel editor and head writer Stan Lee created teenage superhero Peter Parker/Spider-Man, whose debut issue became one of Marvel’s best selling publications. Spider-Man’s popularity grew to the point that he headlined other comics, including being partnered up with other, less mainstream superheroes in the pages of Marvel Team-Up, and amassed one of the most colourful and memorable rogues galleries in all of comics. Sergei Kravinoff (better known as Kraven the Hunter) was created by Spider-Man co-creators Stan Lee and Steve Ditko and made his debut in this story, though he’s perhaps best known for his epic (if temporary) death in the celebrated story arc “Kraven’s Last Hunt” (DeMatteis, et al, 1987). Kraven has long hounded the web-slinger as part of the Sinister Six and across a variety of media, featuring in videogames and the 1990’s Spider-Man cartoon. Finally, after years of stop/start efforts to make it onto the silver screen, Kraven inexplicably made his live-action debut in 2024.

The Review:
Our story begins in classic sixties Spider-Man fare, with Spidey dropping in on a bunch of crooks and breaking up their party. In a change of pace, though, Spider-Man doesn’t just beat them up with ease and grace while expositing how his super strength gives him the edge of New York City’s normal, everyday mooks. Instead, he shoots out a web to trap three of the would-be bank robbers but the fourth, who he presumes is their leader, makes a hasty exit out the window. The leader manages to give Spider-Man the slip by activating a special gas from the inside of his suit that instantly changes his appearance into a harmless old man and, when he gets back to his apartment, reveals his true identity as Dmitri Smerdyakov/The Chameleon, the man of many faces who was the very first supervillain Spider-Man ever encountered. Realising the threat Spider-Man poses, and bitter about being deported and exiled after their last encounter, the Chameleon decides to hire an “old friend”, Kraven the Hunter, to destroy the web-spinner once and for all! It turns out that Kraven has amassed a hell of a reputation as the world’s most accomplished hunter. His achievement of having trapped and defeated every type of animal with his bare hands is so impressive that even cantankerous Daily Bugle editor J. Jonah Jameson is in awe of the hunter’s prowess.

Kraven’s world-famous prowess initially sees him get the upper hand on Spider-Man.

Seeing Kraven’s arrival in the United States as a big scoop, Jameson orders his secretary, Betty Brant, and his long-suffering freelance photographer, Peter Parker, to accompany him to the pier to get an exclusive. There, Betty is unreasonably salty when Peter arrives at the same time as Liz Allen and Eugene “Flash” Thompson but Kraven’s mere presence and physical stature are enough to turn their heads and put a stop to the relationship drama. Kraven turns down Jameson’s request for an exclusive with a dismissive bark, so determined is he to “hunt the most dangerous game of all”, and then gives Peter the shock of his life when he single-handedly rounds up the ship’s animal cargo with speed, strength, and wiles so honed that all Spidey can do is watch in amazement. So fantastic is Kraven’s display of power that Spidey completely forgets to take any pictures, angering Jameson. The newspaper editor’s vexation is replaced with intrigue, however, when Kraven lets slip that he’s there to hunt Spider-Man. Peter’s so stunned by this revelation that he’s speechless when Betty gives him the cold shoulder after Liz showers him with attention, which also riles up her muscle-bound flame, Flash. After all that drama, Kraven meets with the Chameleon to read up on his prey using the research and first-hand experience he has acquired, confidentially assuring his ally that the superhuman strength and reflexes he has been afforded by a witch-doctor’s secret potion will enable him to succeed where others have failed. To allow Kraven to stalk Spider-Man more effectively, the Chameleon hires some goons to cause a ruckus, which naturally attracts Spider-Man. Kraven watches with a begrudging respect for his foe’s power, agility, and cunning, impressed with how easily he fights, evades, and subdues multiple crooks, and then catches the web-spinner by surprise by waiting for him on a nearby rooftop.

Kraven’s potion and confidence cause undue stress to the troubled teenage superhero.

Kraven rushes his quarry, explaining that he’s motivated only by the hunt and the personal triumph that defeating Spider-Man will bring him. He immediately puts his enhanced abilities and research to good use by snatching Spidey out of mid-air and tossing him to the ground. Relentless, Kraven presses his attack with a “nerve punch” that Kraven boasts can “down a full-grown charging rhino”. Spidey takes the shot on the arm, which goes completely numb, and surprises Kraven by fending him off with just one arm. In desperation, the hunter resorts to pricking Spidey with one of his special potions, a concoction designed to sap his spider-strength. Kraven then makes a tactical retreat to allow the drug to do its work and Peter returns home, woozy and suffering from tremors as a result, while Kraven astonishes the Chameleon by revelling in the thrill of the encounter and the battle yet to come. Although Peter awakens back at full strength, he’s alarmed to find his hands are still twitching uncontrollably. He desperately tries to hide his condition from his doting Aunt May, who has arranged a blind date with him the niece of their neighbour, Anna Watson, and is relieved when the twitching dies down by the time he gets to the Daily Bugle. There, his exasperation with Betty’s unprovoked jealousy is quickly replaced by astonishment when Kraven comes barging out of Jameson’s office. Although Jameson hates Spider-Man with a vengeance, he refuses to endorse Kraven’s methods since there are laws against hunting human beings. Kraven’s confidence shakes Peter so badly that his hand tremors make a dramatic and embarrassing return while he’s in Science class, much to the amusement of his peers and the annoyance of his professor, Miles Warren. Peter’s condition is so bad that he can’t aim his webs straight and he’s forced to resort to leaping from building to building as Spider-Man as he aimlessly searches for any sign of his would-be hunter.

Kraven’s cunning and prowess ultimately fail to match with Spidey’s spider-sense.

Fully aware that his prey would seek him out, Kraven arranges for the Chameleon to brazenly walk around town in disguise as the world-famous hunter and lure Spider-Man into Central Park to renew the hunt. Despite his suspicions and his blaring spider-sense, Spidey follows the fake and ends up briefly trapped beneath one of Kraven’s nets. Thankfully, exerting the full limits of his spider strength is enough to snap one of the connecting chains, but he’s so disorientated by one of the Kraven’s loudly beating a drum that he’s unable to stop the other Kraven from slapping metal braces to his right forearm and calf. Designed to “hold a hunger-mad tiger”, the manacles have a magnetic attraction so strong that it takes all Spidey’s incredible strength to keep them apart. They also jingle every time he moves to instantly alert Kraven to his presence, however. Relying on his superhuman reflexes and spider-sense, Spidey stays one step ahead of his hunter and buys enough time to spray the manacles with “liquid web fluid”, which successfully negates their properties. His uncanny sixth sense alerts him to someone hiding in the nearby bushes and Spidey is stunned to unmask the Chameleon as the fake Kraven. This victory reinvigorates the web-head, however, and he quickly turns the hunt against his foe, chasing Kraven deep into the woods using his spider signal. No matter where or how he tries to run and hide, Kraven is continually spotted by his foe and resorts to trying to sneak attack him with his nerve punch, only for Spidey’s spider sense and unmatched agility to keep him off-guard. Angered by Spider-Man’s mocking taunts and realising that he’s lost every advantage, Kraven again tries to make a tactical retreat, but this time runs head-first into one of Spider-Man’s webs. Spidey thus leaves him and the Chameleon there, beaten and humiliated, to be deported by the authorities (though, naturally, they both swear revenge). In the aftermath, Jameson is so elated by Peter’s photographs of the action that he allows Peter to have one of his secret stash of chocolate bars. However, the youngster’s relationship dramas continue to mount even after Mrs. Watson’s niece cancels their blind that as Betty gives him the brush-off and Liz goes out dancing with the hunky Flash.

The Summary:
Considering I don’t think much of Kraven and consider both him and the Chameleon to be two of Spider-Man’s bottom-tier foes, I actually enjoyed “Kraven the Hunter!” quite a bit. Steve Ditko continues to set the standard for how Spider-Man should move and fight in his comics and the action is fast and packs a hell of a punch whenever the two are trading blows or showing off their superhuman skills. I always enjoy the visual difference between Peter and Spider-Man, how being in the costume is such an exhilarating and freeing experience for the socially-inept photographer, and it was a neat twist to see him go toe-to-toe with someone not just seemingly as strong and agile as he, but also far more cunning and ruthless. As ever, Peter’s relationship and personal drama is a constant distraction from his current predicament. While I’m always glad when stories from this era don’t reduce females to babbling bimbos, Betty’s raging jealousy was a serious pain in the ass here. She gets mad at Peter simply because he arrives at the same time as Liz and Flash, assuming he “[came] with her” even though they’re not even near each other in the panel, and acting like a clingy, co-dependent brat just because Liz fixes his tie and calls him “Petey”. While it’s true that Betty probably should be worried about Liz, especially as she’s one of the few to admonish Flash for his attitude towards Peter, all she ends up doing is pushing him towards Liz, with comical results. This may very well have been the first of many hints towards Peter’s most famous love interest, Mary Jane Watson, though Peter’s actually relieved when she cancels their blind date as he already has enough troubles on his plate and isn’t optimistic about the state of Mrs. Watson’s mysterious niece.

Despite the relationship drama and the Chameleon’s presence, Kraven gets a good showing.

Although this issue features the return of the Chameleon, his presence is thankfully downplayed in favour of the far more visually and physically interesting Kraven. The two are depicted as close friends, which is a nice change as it’s not every day you see supervillains palling about so amicably. Naturally, the story goes out of its way to show that Kraven more than meets expectations. The ship’s animal cargo spontaneously getting loose is the perfect excuse to show how fast, smart, and strong he is and prove that he’s more than capable of subduing even the most dangerous of animals with his bare hands. Living for and relishing the thrill of the hunt, Kraven sees Spider-Man as the ultimate prey and goes to some lengths to get a sense of his prowess. I say “some” as Kraven only spends a few panels observing Spider-Man rather than days, which may have contributed to his downfall as he underestimated Spider-Man’s strength and tenacity and was forced to resort to one of his potions and a hasty retreat. Although Kraven’s potion causes Spider-Man some troubles, all it really does is take away his ability to shoot webs straight and in the end all Spider-Man needed to win was his extraordinary spider-sense and superhuman reflexes. Still, Kraven does match blows with Spider-Man and even briefly cripples one of his arms and is proven to be just as agile and physically strong as the web-spinner but, ultimately, he’s undone, in part, by his own hubris. This all made for a surprisingly enjoyable first appearance of Kraven the Hunter. I can’t say it’s changed my opinion of him, or his lame outfit, but it definitely made for a pretty entertaining villain-of-the month Spider-Man story.

My Rating:

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Great Stuff

What are your thoughts on Kraven’s debut? Are you a fan of the character and, if so, what are some of your favourite Kraven tales? Were you annoyed by the relationship drama in Peter’s life, or did you enjoy it as a character-building tool? What did you think to Kraven’s depiction, powers, and personality? Are you a fan of the Chameleon or, like me, do you find him disappointing? How excited were you for Kraven’s live-action debut? Feel free to leave your thoughts on Kraven below and be sure to check out my other Spider-Man content.

Wrestling Recap [Undervember]: Undertaker vs. Batista (WrestleMania 23)

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After debuting as part of the “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase’s Million Dollar Team at the 1990 Survivor Series, the Undertaker became a force of nature within World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE). To celebrate the Deadman’s illustrious career, I’m looking back at his WrestleMania matches against the future members of the super-stable Evolution.

The Date: 1 April 2007
The Venue: Ford Field; Detroit, Michigan
The Commentary: Michael Cole and John “Bradshaw” Layfield/JBL
The Referee: Charles Robinson
The Stakes: No disqualification singles match for the World Heavyweight Championship

The Build-Up:
Over his many years as a WWE Superstar, the Undertaker went on to become a true phenom within the promotion, facing off against a who’s-who of wrestling’s biggest names and amassing the greatest winning streak in wrestling history with 21 WrestleMania wins between 1991 and 2013. By WrestleMania 23, Evolution had long since split up, legal issues had caused a company-wide rebrand, and the WWE had split their roster into three distinct brands, Raw, SmackDown!, and the ill-fated Extreme Championship Wrestling (ECW) revival, each with their own distinct competitors and championships. After defeating his mentor for the World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania 21, Batista impressed in the Raw main event before being drafted to SmackDown! in 2005, where he reigned as a popular babyface champion until being forced to relinquish the belt due to an injury. Upon his return in 2006, the “Animal” regained the World Heavyweight Championship from King Booker and ended up signing a contract to defend the belt against the Undertaker, who had shockingly won the annual Royal Rumble match and then formally chose to challenge Batista on an episode of Raw. Although Batista initially claimed to have great respect for the Undertaker, his patience was tested by the Deadman’s spooky mind games and aggressive stance, which led to many awkward tag team bouts where the two struggled to get along and often left each other to the mercy of their opponents.

The Match:
During the first brand split, I was a SmackDown! guy. This was by necessity rather than choice, since it was available on Sky One for “free” in the United Kingdom at the time, but luckily it meant I was treated to some of the best wrestling available courtesy of the fabled “SmackDown! Six”. There were some strange decisions in that brand split, though, such as splitting apart established tag teams like the Acolytes Protection Agency (APA) and the Dudley Boyz; D-Von Dudley underwent a dramatic repackaging on SmackDown! as “Reverend D-Von” and was accompanied by a monster of a man, Deacon Batista. Looking back now, there’s no way that I (much less anyone else) could’ve predicted that this huge, tattooed, grim-faced heavy would become one of the most popular main eventers of the “Ruthless Aggression” era. Even I didn’t really take notice of Big Dave until he jumped over to Raw and started running with Evolution, but he improved week by week and had such a great look and explosive moveset that I quickly became a fan of his. He was one of those one-of-a-kind guys who just naturally clicked with the audience and his ascension to the top felt natural and earned since the fans latched onto him over Randy Orton and wanted to see him succeed, even if his in-ring skills weren’t perhaps as refined as some other competitors. This wasn’t an issue by 2007; by then, Batista had fully established himself as a big-time player in the WWE and had honed his craft to the point where he was pretty reliable on the mic and in the ring. I think there was a lot of anticipation heading into this match as Batista was still a rising star but he was facing the Undertaker, a guy who had never lost at WrestleMania, with the World Heavyweight Championship on the line. To his credit, Batista showed absolutely no intimidation when the Undertaker stalked his way to the ring through smoke and flanked by fire. If anything, Batista appeared determined and a little pissed off as he dashed at his opponent with a quick tackle and started beating on him in the corner.

The Undertaker was forced to bust out his best moves to counter Batista’s power game.

The Undertaker soon returned the favour, throwing hands in the corner, so Batista countered with some shoulder blocks and sent the Deadman over the ropes to a chorus of boos. The mixed reaction to Batista continued as the two brawled around the ringside area. The Undertaker mostly shrugged off Batista’s shots and the slams into the barricade and ring apron but took a hell of a bump when the champion whipped him knee-first into the steel steps. After rolling the groggy Undertaker into the ring, Batista uncharacteristically climbed to the top rope and hit a diving shoulder block for the first near fall of the match. He then no-sold a big boot and downed the Undertaker with a big clothesline for another near fall and continued to dominate the Deadman with his power game. This quickly turned into a fun spot where the two exchange big right hands, with the fans loudly cheering every punch the Undertaker threw and booing Batista’s. The Undertaker eventually won this exchange and got himself back in the match with a few splashes in the corner and his Snake Eyes/big boot/leg drop combo for a two count. Although the Undertaker hit his “Old School” rope walk strike, Batista powered out of a Chokeslam attempt but the Undertaker shut down the champion’s attempts to regain the momentum by hitting a clunky diving clothesline off the ropes for another two count. The action went outside again where the Undertaker got a measure of revenge by bouncing Batista’s head off the ring steps, running his elbow into the Animal’s jaw, and hitting his apron leg drop to topple Batista to the floor. The Undertaker then returned to the ring and more than made up for his earlier diving clothesline by launching himself over the ropes and taking Batista down with a hell of a suicide dive that left both men down!

Although Batista have his all, the Undertaker emerged victorious and as champion again.

Once they got to their feet, the two continued to brawl at ringside. This time, the Undertaker got whipped into the timekeeper’s table, but Batista made a conscious decision to continuously return to the ring to break the referee’s ten count since he had guaranteed that he would pin the Undertaker for the victory. Thus, Batista beat on the helpless Phenom on the outside before powerslamming him off one announce table and through another! Batista tossed the exhausted challenger into the ring but was left frustrated when the Deadman kicked out no matter how much he pummelled him. This frustration almost cost him as the Undertaker forced his way out of a Batista Bomb attempt, but Batista shut that down with a beautiful belly-to-belly slam for a two count. Batista then let his emotions get the better of him as he lashed out with the ten punches in the corner and left himself wide open for a Last Ride and the crowd was stunned when the Animal managed to kick out at two. Batista answered back with his big spinebuster, but his momentum was again thwarted first by the Undertaker’s zombie sit up and then by a Chokeslam, but again the champion was able to kick out before the three. The closing stretch saw Batista slip out of a Tombstone Piledriver and drill the Undertaker with a Spear before finally hitting the Batista Bomb…for a two count! Aghast, Batista tried to hit it again but the Undertaker powered out. The Phenom then reversed Batista’s attempt at a Tombstone, bounced him out of the corner, and nailed the Animal with the legendary Tombstone Piledriver to score the victory, earning himself his fifth World Championship and bringing the Streak to 15-0. This one was actually really good; the Undertaker seemed hungry and ready to fight and the match made good use of Batista’s power game. I liked the story of Batista being determined to get a legitimate, uncontested pin fall victory and trying to hit the Batista Bomb and being exasperated when it failed to get the job done. The Undertaker also did a hell of a job making Batista look good by throwing his body at the Animal at every opportunity. It lacked a little edge at times and JBL’s obnoxious commentary was, as ever, quite the distraction but this could’ve been a great place to end the Streak. Yhe Undertaker didn’t need the World Championship to be popular, especially at this time, but if he had gone into the event with the belt instead of challenging for it, I think that outcome could’ve been a little different for Big Dave.

The Aftermath:
Since this match was heralded as one of the best matches the two ever had, it’s perhaps no surprise that the Undertaker and Batista were far from done following this exchange. Batista himself felt slighted that the two didn’t get the main event spot at WrestleMania 23, which may have contributed to the two clashing twice more in the following months. Batista challenged the Undertaker at Backlash in a Last Man Standing match and in a steel cage match on SmackDown!, but both matches ended in controversial draws. Unfortunately, their rivalry was cut short when the Undertaker suffered an injury. The WWE had Edge cash-in his Money in the Bank contract to steal the belt so Batista transitioned into challenging Edge for the title, though he was unsuccessful each time. It wasn’t until he got into it with the Great Khali that Batista regained the World Championship and, once the Undertaker returned from his injury later in 2007, the two continued to face off for the belt. Interference from Edge meant Batista finally emerged victorious and the three men faced off at Armageddon at the end of the year, with Edge regaining the belt in a triple threat match. By WrestleMania XXIV, the Undertaker was challenging Edge in the main event while Batista had to settle for representing SmackDown! in a “Battle for Brand Supremacy” against Raw’s Umaga, though the Animal and the Deadman would cross paths again three more times between 2008 and 2009, with the Undertaker being victorious in each instance.

My Rating:

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Great Stuff

What did you think to the Undertaker’s battle against Batista at WrestleMania 23? How would you rate it against the Undertaker’s other WrestleMania matches? Do you think the Undertaker needed the World Championship at this point in his career? Were you a fan of Batista’s and would you have liked to see the Streak end at his hands? Do you think this match should’ve been the main event of the evening? How are you celebrating the Undertaker’s debut this year, what are some of your favourite matches and moments from his long and distinguished career, and what dream match would you have liked to see him involved in? Whatever your thoughts, drop a comment below and go check out my reviews of other Undertaker matches across the site!

Wrestling Recap: Elimination Chamber Match (Survivor Series ’02)

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The Date: 17 November 2002
The Venue: Madison Square Garden; New York, New York
The Commentary: Jim “J.R.” Ross and Jerry “The King” Lawler
The Referee: Earl Hebner
The Stakes: Six-man Elimination Chamber match for Triple H’s World Heavyweight Championship

The Build-Up:
Over its many decades as the dominating force in sports entertainment, World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) has created some of the industry’s most successful competitors, changed the face of pay-per-view entertainment, and delivered some game-changing match types. In 1987, the then-World Wrestling Federation (WWF) struck it big with WrestleMania, a pay-per-view showcase that was so successful that WWF Chairman Vince McMahon strong-armed many cable companies into showing their follow-up event, Survivor Series, over the National Wrestling Alliance’s (NWA) Starrcade pay-per-view. Although the show was famous for featuring a series of ten-man elimination tag team matches, this format was shaken up in 2002 with the introduction of the “Elimination Chamber”. This was a merciless steel structure that forced four men to wait in “bulletproof pods” as two others fought in the ring, with each participant joining the match at random at regular intervals and wrestlers being eliminated by pin fall or submission until only one is left standing. At this time, the WWE’s hefty roster was split into two distinct brands, Raw and SmackDown!, and the Elimination Chamber was first introduced by Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff as a means to out-do his blue branded rival. The chamber would prove the perfect staging ground to force World Heavyweight Champion Triple H (who was in the midst of a “Reign of Terror” alongside his Evolution allies, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair, Randy Orton, and Batista) against his five top challengers, men he had spent the previous year humiliating and destroying both in the ring and in backstage segments. While Chris Jericho, Kane, Booker T, and Rob Van Dam all had legitimate beef with Triple H, the real story heading into the match was the return of Triple H’s former D-Generation X teammate, the “Heartbreak Kid” Shawn Michaels. HBK had been famously sidelined with a career-ending back injury in 1998 and Triple H had flourished as a main event heel in the interim. Although HBK functioned as an on-air personality, he made an unexpected in-ring return in June 2002 and was set to reunite with Triple H before his friend viciously attacked him, leading to a brutal street fight at the 2002 SummerSlam that briefly took HBK off television before he dramatically returned to Raw to be the final entrant in the first of what would become an annual event match for the WWE.

The Match:
I was massively invested in wrestling by 2002. While I was mainly watching SmackDown! due to the limitations of my Sky package, I still followed Raw and caught the odd pay-per-view so I was fully aware of Triple H’s dominating run with the World Heavyweight Championship. Honestly, 2002 was one of my favourite times in wrestling just for the stars and music involved: Jericho was played to the ring by Saliva, Kane was sporting perhaps my favourite look of his and had a banging theme song, and Triple H made regular use of Motörhead both as a singles star and as part of Evolution. Things went a little extreme during this time and Triple H started absorbing other belts along the way, which was a bit of a mistake (and clearly upper management agreed as they restored the Intercontinental Championship soon enough) but it was a good way to showcase new faces in the main event scene. Some of these guys, like Rob Van Dam and Booker T, were overdue their time in the sun while others, like Chris Jericho and Kane, could easily be slotted into the title picture without any issue. Of course, the big story of the year was HBK’s incredible comeback. HBK hadn’t been an active wrestler when I started watching but his reputation preceded him and I was completely caught up in the drama and hatred that quickly brewed between him and his former best friend since it was our best shot at seeing Triple H relieved of his championship belt. I remember also feeling a lot of anticipation about the first-ever Elimination Chamber match. I’d never seen a War Games match at the time so the closest analogy I (and most people had) was the Hell in a Cell match, but I was excited about it as it was a nice twist on the traditional Survivor Series match. Triple H and Rob Van Dam kicked off the match (literally in RVD’s case) and immediately rekindled their rivalry from earlier in the year, with RVD working Triple H over with his “educated feet” and martial arts agility.

RVD impressed throughout the match but almost killed Triple H with a botched splash off the top!

RVD continued to press his advantage by back dropping Triple H out of a Pedigree attempt, over the ropes, to the raised steel floor at ringside. RVD followed up by repeatedly launching “The Game” into the chained walls of the chamber, busting him open in the process, and even hitting his backflip/monkey flip combo out on the steel and his trademark Rolling Thunder over the ropes and to the outside! Triple H was unexpectedly saved from a potential Five-Star Frog Splash off a chamber pod when Jericho grabbed at RVD’s leg but the Game ended up crotched on the top rope and taking a rolling senton to the face anyway. Triple H continued to take a beating against the chain-link walls and in the ring, but was given a brief reprieve when Jericho entered the match and got into it with RVD. Things don’t go too well for the self-proclaimed “King of the World”, however, as he got nailed with RVD’s spinning kick for a two count and then took his jumping side kick out the corner, and RVD even managed to pivot in mid-air to briefly cling to the cage and then take Jericho out with a dive off the wall! Despite the blood loss and the beating he took, Triple H walloped RVD with a clothesline; this was enough for Jericho to plant him with a back suplex and try his awesome cocky pin. Although RVD valiantly fought back, Triple H’s Harley Race-style knee strike shut him down and he and Jericho put aside their differences to pummel RVD . RVD dodged a corner splash, however, only to get absolutely planted by a DDT from Triple H. Luckily, the odds evened up as Booker T entered the fray. He rode his recent wave of momentum to go after both Jericho and Triple H and even had time to celebrate with a Spinaroonie before he and RVD went at it. Although RVD still had plenty of gas left in the tank, a couple of big side kicks from Booker T led to a near fall. Not to be outdone, RVD got a two count off a spinning heel kick before Triple H interjected himself into their fight, only to eat a Scissors Kick for his troubles. Although Jericho attacked Booker T before he could make a cover, things got seriously bad for Triple H when his throat was legitimately crushed after RVD miscalculated a Five-Star Frog Splash off a pod. RVD was then anti-climatically eliminated from the match after a Missile Dropkick from Booker T.

Kane’s rampage came to a dramatic end and HBK eliminated Jericho to go on-on-one with Triple H.

Jericho and Booker T frantically went at it as Triple H recuperated, with Booker T dodging the Lionsault and planting Jericho with his snap spinebuster for a two count. Kane was then released from his pod and started hitting everyone in sight. He easily manhandled Jericho, ramming him into the chained walls and then threw him through the pod plexiglass! Kane beat on Triple H for a little before focusing on Booker T, nailing a Chokeslam that allowed the bloodied Jericho to eliminate Booker with a Lionsault. Kane continued to pulverise Jericho on the outside before dumping him back in the ring with a military press. He easily fended off Triple H’s desperate attempts to get back into things and scored a near fall off a suplex before tossing Triple H off the top rope. Jericho countered a Chokeslam with a kick to the balls and finally knocked Kane down with a Missile Dropkick, meaning all three men were down when HBK (and his atrocious brown tights) was finally unleashed. Shawn Michaels went after Jericho and Kane like a house on fire but his momentum stalled after Kane nailed him with a Chokeslam. Kane then hit another on Triple H and caught Jericho in mid-air for a third Chokeslam. However, when Kane tried to hit the Tombstone Piledriver on Triple H, he got blasted with Sweet Chin Music from HBK, drilled with a Pedigree, and finally pinned and eliminated off a Lionsault. Jericho followed up by ramming HBK into the cage wall, drawing blood in the process and leaving him a helpless husk for him and Triple H to beat on in a heinous assault. Triple H dumped his former friend to the outside so he could grind his face against the chains and bounce him off the plexiglass. He and Jericho then took turns pummeling HBK’s bloodstained face, dumping him on the steel floor, and repeatedly smashing him off the chain-link wall. HBK mounted a brief comeback with a flying forearm and a nip-up, but Jericho put a stop to that with yet another Lionsault. However, Shawn refused to be pinned and caught Jericho off-guard with a moonsault for a near fall. Triple H then saved Jericho when HBK had him in his own Walls of Jericho submission hold and started brawling with Y2J after he tried to eliminate his hated rival. Although Jericho almost made the Game tap with the Walls of Jericho, Y2J got nailed with Sweet Chin Music and summarily eliminated by Shawn Michaels, meaning that the match came down to the two former friends going at it once again.

HBK and Triple H’s bloody brawl ends with Shawn toppling the Game and becoming World Champion!

The two bloodied, exhausted one-time allies traded punches, an exchange that ended with Triple H scoring a two count off a massive Arn Anderson-like spinebuster. HBK then found himself tossed outside again and catapulted right through the plexiglass of a pod when he dared to try and hit Triple H with a Pedigree on the steel, though is only resulted in another near fall as Shawn refused to die. Frustrated, desperate to inflict more punishment, Triple H urged HBK to his feet and the two got into a heated slugfest that ended with Shawn getting smashed with Triple H’s knee facebuster. HBK got a measure of revenge on the outside, however, when he reversed a Pedigree attempt into a catapult of his own that saw Triple H’s battered face bounce off the chain-link wall one more time. Shawn Michaels followed with his signature Diving Elbow from the top of a pod but chose to tune up the band rather than go for the pin. Triple H caught Shawn’s foot, however, and drilled him with a Pedigree but the champion was too hurt to immediately capitalise and HBK got the shoulder up at two. Triple H then tried for another Pedigree but Shawn countered with a back drop and then nailed Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere and scored the victory to an absolutely thunderous applause. He then celebrated his big comeback and title victory with tears in his eyes and under a shower of confetti. Considering no one knew what to expect from this first-ever Elimination Chamber match, this was a really good and well-paced contest. The competitors made really good use of the space to showcase how dangerous the structure is and give a taste of the athletic and innovative manoeuvres the chamber’s walls and pods could offer. While it somewhat undermined the narrative of the plexiglass being “bulletproof” to have it smashed in this first match, it worked wonderfully to showcase Kane’s brutality and Shawn’s never-say-die attitude. It’s amazing that Triple H was able to continue the match considering he could’ve been killed from RVDs freak botch, but it didn’t interrupt the flow of the match as these guys all knew how to buy him time to recover. RVD and Jericho stole the match in the early going. RVD’s athleticism and conditioning really impressed me and I was surprised to see Jericho score the most eliminations, and off the Lionsault no less! Kane got a good showing with his power game but I think more could’ve been done to help him stand out as a force of nature, but the one to watch was clearly Booker T. The guy was so popular at this point and I think the crowd would’ve been just as happy to see him or RVD get the win as much as HBK. However, you can’t take away from Shawn’s incredible comeback story. We never thought we’d see him back in the ring, much less a World Champion again, and this was a really emotional, cathartic moment for him and those who just wanted to see Triple H dethroned as champion.

The Aftermath:
Although Booker T, Kane, and Chris Jericho largely faded out of the main event scene in the immediate aftermath to this match, Shawn Michaels and Triple H were far from done with their rivalry, and poor old Rob Van Dam got caught up in the middle of it. RVD was defeated by Triple H to earn the Game a shot at the World Heavyweight Championship in a “Three Stages of Hell” match at Armageddon the following month, where Triple H regaining the belt after enduring a street fight, a steel cage, and a ladder match. While Triple H was busying stinking up the main event scene in horrendous matches with “Big Poppa Pump” Scott Steiner, Kane, Jericho, Shawn Michaels, RVD, and Booker T all competed in the Royal Rumble match and all came up short. Although Booker T earned himself a shot at Triple H’s World Heavyweight Championship at WrestleMania XIX, he was resoundingly defeated despite everything pointing to a big babyface victory! Kane and RVD formed a tag team in the interim and eventually ended up at odds with each other after the Big Red Machine’s dramatic unmasking. Jericho and HBK got into an emotionally-charged feud that only got worse after Y2J’s temper tantrum at WrestleMania XIX, and Triple H went on to have lacklustre matches against Goldberg throughout 2003. HBK and Triple H rekindled their rivalry near the end of 2003. HBK appeared to defeat Triple H for the belt on an episode of Raw that was ruled a draw and the two again went to a no contest in a Last Man Standing match at the 2004 Royal Rumble. This led to HBK interjecting himself into the WrestleMania XX main event. Though he was ultimately unsuccessful, his tumultuous relationship with Triple H would continue on and off over the next few years before the two finally got back on the same page and reformed D-Generation X in 2006.

My Rating:

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Great Stuff

What did you think to the first-ever Elimination Chamber match? Who was your pick to win at the time? What did you think the the level of violence on show in the match? Were you impressed that Triple H was able to continue after his injury? What did you think to Shawn Michaels’ big comeback and championship win here? Which Elimination Chamber match or event is your favourite? Whatever your thoughts on the Elimination Chamber, feel free to leave them below or drop a c and be sure to check out my other wrestling reviews!

Screen Time [Gazpacho Soup Day]: Red Dwarf (Series Three)

Dr. K3 Comments

In the episode “Me2” (Bye, 1988) of the classic British science-fiction comedy show Red Dwarf (1988 to 2020), it is revealed the Arnold Rimmer’s (Chris Barrie) last words were “Gazpacho soup!” and that he made a point to celebrate November 25th as “Gazpacho Soup Day” after a particularly traumatising visit to the Captain’s Table.

Series Three

Air Date: 14 November 1989 to 19 December 1989
Director: Ed Bye
Original Network: BBC2
Stars: Chris Barrie, Craig Charles, Danny John-Jules, Robert Llewellyn, and Hattie Hayridge

The Background:
In the mid-1980s, Rob Grant and Doug Naylor created Dave Hollins: Space Cadet, a BBC Radio 4 sci-fi comedy show influenced by classics of the genre like Dark Star (John Carpenter, 1974) and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Adams, 1978; Bell, 1981). Dave Hollins was also the prototype for Red Dwarf, a concept the duo struggled to sell despite emphasising character and comedy over genre. After casting impressionist Chris Barrie and Liverpudlian “punk poet” Craig Charles in the lead roles of Second Technician Arnold J. Rimmer and Third Technician Dave Lister, respectively, the cast was rounded out by singer and dancer Danny John-Jules and sardonic stand-up comedian Norman Lovett. Red Dwarf was eventually aired in early-1988 and, while viewing figures dropped during the first six-episode series, audience feedback was so strong that the BBC greenlit a second series. Granted a bigger budget, Grant and Naylor expanded the premise and, thanks to Red Dwarf now having an established audience, series two was more favourably received. The show was now a cult hit and afforded an even bigger budget for the third series, which saw a complete redesign of the sets and the introduction of a new model, and service mechanoid Kryten joining the crew (albeit now played by Robert Llewellyn). Widely regarded as one of the best sets of episodes throughout the show’s entire run, Grant and Naylor enhanced series three seasons with additional digital effects some ten years later, to some criticism. Since then, Red Dwarf continued to be consistently popular even after Grant and Naylor parted ways, returning from a lengthy absence with a series of specials and revivals that arguably struggled to match the quality of this season.

The Plot:
The mining ship Red Dwarf drifts through deep space three million years into the future, crewed by the last human being alive, Dave Lister, Arnold Rimmer, a hologram of his deceased superior officer, a humanoid cat (John-Jules), service mechanoid Kryten, and the ship’s neurotic computer, Holly (Hayridge). Their journey sees them visit a version of Earth where times runs backwards, dabble in time travel, swap bodies with each other, and the imminent arrival of Kryten’s ultra-modern replacement.

The Review:
Series three is really when Red Dwarf hit its stride, in many ways; at least, it is for me. Gone is the slow, strangely ominous opening sequence, replaced with a rockin’ cover of the main theme that plays over clips from the series to give a sense of the zany action viewers can expect. The first episode, “Backwards”, also starts with an amusing parody of the traditional Star Wars (Various, 1977 to present) opening scroll that flies past in the blink of an eye. Eagle-eyed viewers or those who slow down the footage will learn about how Lister returned his twins to the female-dominated parallel universe where they were conceived, how the ship’s computer, Holly, assumed the guise of his counterpart from that same reality after falling in love with her, and how service mechanoid Kryten suffered a horrific accident that saw him rebuilt by Lister to now join the crew. Additionally, Lister and Rimmer have now moved to the far more luxurious officer’s quarters, gaining bigger bunks, an en suite shower, and a far more comfortable and eye-catching space for them to socialize and bicker. Enough time has passed between Kryten’s offscreen repairs for the overly polite and submission mechanoid to have fully ingratiated into ship life, with him anxiously taking his pilot’s exam in the first episode as a way of introducing the show’s newest and most iconic ship-to-surface vehicle, the appropriately named Starbug. Even the ship’s corridors and layout have undergone a dramatic change, switching from the dull grey paintjob to a more ominous and dramatic hallways. Rather than recycle the sets from the first two series, series three introduces new areas, such as a dark room (where Kryten rocks out while developing photos), a club where the crew celebrate what’s believed to be Kryten’s final night before he’s forcibly replaced, and the science lab. The vending machines have a new design, we visit a claustrophobic cargo bay, and more episodes take place off-ship, with Rimmer and Lister literally being marooned on a frigid world at one point and the crew indulging in a bit of fun, if limited, time travel.

Lister and Rimmer’s relationship deepens, with the two sharing as much as they clash.

Lister and Rimmer’s contentious relationship remains a focal point of the series but has evolved to the point where Rimmer simply despairs of his slovenly roommate and Lister openly criticizes Rimmer’s boneheaded decisions. When Rimmer and Kryten prove a smash hit on the backwards version of Earth, Lister lists the many reasons why staying on such a bizarre world make little sense and openly challenges Rimmer’s tenuous authority when his fear is removed by the gruesome polymorph. The two are force to co-exist and we see a deeper representation of their dynamic in “Marooned”. Stuck with only each other for company, Lister must practically beg Rimmer to keep his mind off his seemingly inevitable slow death from either extreme cold or hunger and we explicitly see why Rimmer was chosen to keep Lister company after the ship’s crew were wiped out. Rimmer represents a smug, authoritarian antagonist Lister can focus his despair and loneliness onto and Rimmer fulfils this role admirably, chastising Lister’s short-focused greediness and trying to impress upon him the need to ration himself and make personal sacrifices to stay warm. Of course, Rimmer’s awe at Lister burning his beloved guitar soon turns to rage when he realises the devious slob has actually desecrated Rimmer’s prized camphorwood chest. Their relationship is further tested in “Bodyswap” when Rimmer sees a chance to experience the thrill of being alive once more. After failing to convince Lister to swap minds and bodies, Rimmer forces him to undergo the transfer and immediately indulges his every vice. Trapped in a hologrammatic body and powerless to prevent Rimmer from gorging himself, Lister is horrified when Rimmer hijacks his body and almost dies fleeing from reprisals in Starbug. Finally, the two clash in their attempts to alter the timeline using mutated developing fluid; discovering a limited means to travel to the past, they each vie to create the strangely popular “Tension Sheet” before the other. This gives a glimpse into Lister’s past as an ambitious but untalented musician and into an alternative life where he’s a successful rock star with a giant mansion and an obnoxious attitude. While Rimmer’s motivations for resetting the status quo are purely selfish for he wishes to have that life for himself, it also comes from a deep-seated desire to not be left alone on Red Dwarf, a fate worse than being trapped with people he barely tolerates let alone likes.

Kryten fits right in with the misfit crew and adds an extreme layer of dry comedic value.

While still a flamboyant, self-serving, egotistical narcissist, the Cat is far more well-rounded here. An accomplished pilot in his own right, he’s often partnered with Lister as a far more amicable, if not less self-absorbed, alternative to Rimmer. The Cat and Lister regularly engage in game night, playing various tabletop and physical games to occupy themselves, and the Cat seems genuinely hurt when the despondent Lister refuses to play and lashes out in frustration at being stuck in deep space as the last man alive. While the Cat is seemingly nonplussed when Rimmer and Kryten disappear in “Backwards”, he’s so distraught at Lister’s own disappearance in “Marooned” that he doesn’t “buff his shoes for three days” and reacts with elation upon spotting the crashed Starbug. Additionally, when a sugar-high Rimmer takes Lister’s body hostage and goes for a joyride, the Cat immediately volunteers to pursue him in Blue Midget (though mainly to avoid giving Lister possession of his body) and joins the crew in celebrating Kryten’s life in “The Last Day”. Kryten adds a lot to the ship dynamic, being a logical and deadpan presence amidst such bombastic characters. Though his inclusion makes Holly superfluous since he has a physical presence and isn’t suffering from computer senility, Kryten makes a great impression by performing parlour tricks for the Backworld inhabitants with Rimmer, overseeing the mind swap procedure, and in his surprisingly emotional reaction to the crew risking their lives when Hudzen-10 (Gordon Kennedy) arrives to replace him. Indeed, while Kryten is happy to accept his replacement and inevitable shutdown, Lister rallies against it, openly criticising Kryten’s belief that he’ll be rewarded for a lifetime of servitude in “Silicon Heaven”. Surprisingly, it’s Rimmer who’s the voice of reason here; though also sad, in his own way, he chastises Lister for mocking Kryten’s beliefs, however illogical and unfair they seem. Of course, Kryten really steals the show in “Polymorph”, where we see his various groinal attachments at work, witness him desperately and suggestively remove Lister’s shrinking underpants, and get a taste of his occasional semi-rebellious attitude when the titular monster removes his guilt and he’s suddenly insulting his friends and happy to sacrifice them to the polymorph to save his own hide.

It’s not an exaggeration to say every episode of the series is an absolutely classic.

Indeed, in a series full of standout episodes, “Polymorph” is one of the best. In keeping with series tradition, the titular creature (which is totally not a Xenomorph) isn’t an alien, but a genetically engineered lifeform (GELF) bred to remove its victim’s emotions. Beginning as a comical slug-like creature, the polymorph changes shape to lure in its prey and grows larger and more monstrous the more it feeds. It even feeds on artificial emotions, removing Rimmer’s anger and Kryten’s guilt, turning the former into a peace-loving hippy and the latter into an outspoken rogue. The Cat, normally the most stylish and confident of the crew, is reduced to a whiskey swilling vagrant happy to throw away his life when the creature removes his vanity and Lister becomes an angry, trigger happy brute eager to tackle the creature even if it means “sacrificing his life in some stupid, pointless way”. With only Holly on hand as the voice of reason, the dramatically compromised crew only succeed through pure luck and, even then, the ending suggests that a second polymorph is lurking in the background. “Backwards” is also a favourite of mine; though Lister’s initially amazed to finally be back home, he soon realises that he cannot exist in a world where time runs in reverse. Kryten and Rimmer, however, find a niche as the “Sensational Reverse Brothers” and are prepared to stay before a “barroom tidy” sees them fired as pub entertainers. Finally, “Timeslides” is a fun episode that starts off exploring Lister’s loneliness and anger and evolves into a game of one-upmanship not unlike “Stasis Leak” (Bye, 1988) where Lister and Rimmer desperately travel to different snapshots of their pasts to try and invent a simple but profitable stress reliever and change their fates. When Lister convinces his past self (Emile Charles) to patent the Tension Sheet, he, Cat, and Kryten disappear from the timeline, leaving Rimmer alone with Holly. Refusing to accept this, Rimmer first tries to convince the now wealthy and successful Lister to rejoin the crew and then travels to an earlier point in time to beat him to the punch. While his younger self (Simon Gaffney) fails to follow his instructions, Rimmer inadvertently restores the timeline…and himself to life. However, his elation is short-lived as he accidentally blows himself up, completely restoring the status quo.

The Summary:
As with the previous two series, I generally watch the Remastered version of Red Dwarf’s third season (1998), which replaces all model shots with CGI models and a new opening sequence. Series three includes some additional changes, most notably in “Polymorph” where new CGI first-person shots of the slug-like polymorph’s travels were added alongside a text epilogue to the episode that states the polymorph died in Lister’s underpants drawer, and a bizarre redubbing of Rimmer’s mother (Kalli Greenwood). It’s also worth nothing that the DVD release of the series allows you to watch “Backwards” in reverse, meaning all the Backworld dialogue is now understandable and reveals that the pub manager’s (Arthur Smith) tirade at Rimmer and Kryten is simply the actor mocking the efforts of people to understand his dialogue! Rimmer debuts perhaps his most iconic look here and has become a foil for the entire crew, rather than just Lister. He despairs of Kryten’s constant subservient demeanour but doesn’t hesitate to take advantage of it when it suits him, is more than happy to gorge himself in Lister’s slovenly body, and bemoans Holly’s incompetence when she’s unable to tell the difference between specks of grit and black holes. Lister occasionally shows a surprising emotional maturity this season, desperate to convince Rimmer and Kryten to leave Backworld, revealing much of his chirpy disposition is covering a depressing pain at being the last man alive, and raging at the idea that Kryten could be so easily replaced. Both Lister and Rimmer reveal more about their pasts, such as their sexual experiences and childhoods, adding additional dimensions to their characters even as they try to compromise the other into burning their beloved possessions or change their fates. It’s great seeing their roles literally reversed in “Bodyswap”, where Lister’s powerless to keep Rimmer from ruining his body with cigars and food and Rimmer becomes addicted to the rush of being alive, a euphoria that no doubt informs his short-lived celebration at the conclusion of “Time Slides”.    

The series expands on the characters’ personalities through humour and pathos.

Jokes in series three are absolutely top notch; all the characters feel far more familiar and the actors much more comfortable with each other so their rapport is even more natural. Even Kryten fits in like a glove, with Robert Llewellyn easily taking up the mantle from David Ross and making the character his own. Kryten’s interactions with Lister and Rimmer in episodes like “Polymorph” and “Body Swap” showcase how hilarious this group can be, with Kryten forced to obey every command “no matter how insane” and performing menial tasks by plugging appliances into his groin. I also enjoyed Lister repurposing medical supplies for his meal and scuffling with Adolf Hitler and Nuremberg, and that series three gives the actors a chance to explore different sides to their characters. “Polymorph” is the most obvious example as they all undergo extreme personality changes and are rendered even more inept as a result. “Timeslides” also shows us a version of Lister without his shady moral compass, and his naïve but charismatic younger self, while Rimmer develops a carefree and increasingly insane attitude when he hijacks Lister’s body. Kryten is also faced with his far more efficient, imposing replacement in “The Last Day”, a surprisingly emotional episode in which Lister first refuses to accept and then is determined to celebrate Kryten’s impending shutdown. The drunk crew share some emotional scenes that soon lead to accusations about Lister’s parentage and, though desperately hungover, resolve to defend Kryten from the maniacal Hudzen-10 even though they’re physically outmatched. Similarly, the crew are faced with their pending destruction when Lister accidentally activates the ship’s self-destruct sequence in “Body Swap”, a desperate situation masterfully subverted when it’s revealed Holly disposed of the bomb and never told the crew since they didn’t ask! Additionally, Lister faces his own impending demise in “Marooned” where he’s forced not only to rely on Rimmer for emotional support but also to choke down dog food and Pot Noodles. This is an equally torturous situation for Rimmer not just because he faces the very real possibility of watching the closest thing he has to a friend die before his eyes, but also because Lister burns Rimmer’s prized possessions to stay alive. Interestingly, Rimmer seems to connect with the younger Lister, though his enthusiasm for the “Om” song could easily be interpreted as sarcasm. Still, his impassioned plea to the time-altered Lister seems genuine, though born from his fears of loneliness.

Series three was peak Red Dwarf and established a new standard for the show.

As much as I enjoyed series two, series three of Red Dwarf is where the show really started to land with me. Every episode is a gold mine of comedic situations and memorable moments. While many of these are in “Polymorph” (still one of the best episodes of the entire show), each episode shines as the writers explore the boundaries of the show’s unique sci-fi setting. Kryten was a welcome presence, adding additional comedy by playing the logical but still awkward straight man to his more volatile crewmates. It was fun seeing the crew bumble about on Backworld, riding and driving backwards without really realising it and performing simple tasks to the amazement of their audience, with the reverse brawl being an obvious highlight. I enjoyed exploring Rimmer and Lister’s relationship in “Marooned”, how they genuinely seemed to connect and yet Lister couldn’t help but sabotage Rimmer’s beloved family heirloom to safeguard his guitar. “Polymorph” explored extreme opposites of their personalities, showing that this ragtag crew may be dysfunctional but support each other well despite being very different personalities. “Body Swap” explored these personalities in a fun new way, with Lister left disapproving of Rimmer’s outrageous antics and getting a taste of how helpless Rimmer often feels as a hologram. While there are some logic gaps in “Timeslides”, the time travel shenanigans were fun and I enjoyed exploring a world where Lister never got marooned in deep space yet was still a slob, despite his great wealth. “The Last Day” is a great character showcase for Kryten, showing how much the crew care for him (Lister especially) to the point where they willingly defend him even though Hudzen-10 deems them all “viable targets” for termination. The resolution to this is as ingenious as it is hilarious: the menacing mechanoid is forced into a “metaphysical dichotomy” when Kryten lies about the existence of Silicon Heaven, cementing his place in the crew. Series three is easily the best of the classic era of Red Dwarf and a must-watch for anyone looking to get into the show. It’s sci-fi sit-com at its finest and showcases some of the best and most amusing moments for the crew and remains as appealing today as it was all those years ago.

My Rating:

Rating: 5 out of 5.

Fantastic

Is series three of Red Dwarf your favourite of the show’s run? What did you think to Kryten becoming a full-time member of the crew? Did you enjoy the exploration of Lister and Rimmer’s relationship and their constant one-upmanship? What did you think to the depiction of time travel and solidarity the crew showed towards Kryten? Which episode was your favourite and how are you celebrated Gazpacho Soup Day today? Feel free to share your thoughts and memories of Red Dwarf down in the comments and be sure to check out my other Red Dwarf content on the site.

Back Issues [Sonic2sDay]: The Nameless Zone

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After the release of Sonic the Hedgehog (Sonic Team, 1991), Sonic was established as the hottest videogame icon. In anticipation for the sequel, SEGA dubbed November 24, 1992 as “Sonic 2sday”. Accordingly, this seems like a great excuse to celebrate Sonic’s faithful sidekick, Miles “Tails” Prower, who debuted in that title.

Story Title: “The Nameless Zone” (Parts 1 and 2)
Published: 25 December 1993 to 8 January 1994
Writer: Nigel Kitching
Artist: Dave Windett

The Background:
Sonic the Hedgehog was a huge success for SEGA. Thanks to an aggressive marketing campaign and being included with the all-powerful 16-bit Mega Drive, Sonic sold over 15 million copies upon release. After a tumultuous development, Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (SEGA Technical Institute, 1992) surpassed its predecessor by a country mile! 400,000 copies were sold in its first week alone, 6 million units during the Mega Drive’s lifespan, and the game increased SEGA’s control of the home console market by 40%. Widely praised and highly regarded, Sonic 2 also debuted a kid sidekick for Sonic. The result of an internal contest, Miles “Tails” Prower was created by Yasushi Yamaguchi, modelled after the mythical kitsune, and greatly admired his super-fast hero. Well regarded as a popular staple in the Sonic franchise, Tails has the distinction of being one of the few of Sonic’s supporting cast to star in his own divisive solo outings and he was also the first to get his own solo stories in Sonic’s comic book adventures. The first of these was this two-part adventure that featured in Sonic the Comic (StC), a fortnightly comic book published in the United Kingdom that pulled much of its lore from the now defunct Mobius and Doctor Ovi Kintobor storyline. Tails’ adventures in StC cast him as an unlikely hero in a fantasy setting where he struggled to live up to the reputation he’d made for himself, and his adventures continued to feature in StC even as it transitioned to a fan-made digital format.

The Review:
Remember that flashback Tails had in Sonic Adventure (Sonic Team, 1998)? You know, the one where he sees Sonic running past and chases after him, all excited and happy? Well, “The Nameless Zone” begins with a similar scene of Tails chasing after Sonic only it’s very different. In case you forgot or didn’t know, StC-Sonic was a bit of a dick; he truly did have an attitude and he constantly berated his friends, especially Tails. Frequently referring to the young fox as “pixel brain” and chastising him, it’s a wonder Tails bothered to put up with it for so long. Sonic’s no different here; he’s in such a hurry that the last thing he needs is Tails shadowing him and slowing him down. Thus, the super-fast hedgehog speeds off, ordering Tails to stay out of his way, and leaving the young fox cub dejected. He’s so upset at not being able to prove himself to his hero that he’s completely blindsided when a mystical portal opens behind him and a mysterious voice beckons him from beyond, using his real name and calling for his aid. Tails immediately recognises the portal, and the voice, and his heart sinks ever further. Unable to escape his fate, he begrudgingly enters the portal and returns to the titular “Nameless Zone”, a fantasy realm adjacent to Mobius where Tails grew up. Tails is shocked to be greeted by the Enchanter Kings, the two rulers of the sword-and-sorcery world who have reached out to him on the mistaken belief that he’s become a great hero in his absence. They believe this because Tails foolishly wrote letters to his family in which he took credit for Sonic’s heroic acts, spinning a yarn in which Sonic is his sidekick and he, not the Blue Blur, is the true hero of Mobius. Realising that his exaggerated claims have landed him in hot water, Tails tries to explain the situation only for the Enchanter Kings to brush it off as false modesty.

Believed to be a legendary hero, Tails is forced to defend his estranged home from a demonic creature.

They present Tails with an enchanted set of nifty battle armour that’s magically designed to be near weightless when worn. Despite his protests, Tails is fitted with the armour and the Enchanter Kings prepare him to put his legendary heroism to the test to defend their kingdom. The test? Well, it’s none other than a monstrous, demonic creature known as Trogg who has crossed the dimensional bridge to the Nameless Zone from his realm, the “Land Beyond”, and demanded to face their champion in mortal combat. Trogg desires nothing less than to invade the Nameless Zone with his berserker army and is unimpressed with the “shrimp” heralded as their champion. His protests falling on deaf ears, Tails has no choice but to take up his sword and meet Trogg on the bridge. When Trogg demands that Tails take his “best shot”, Tails bravely swings his sword in a clumsy effort and gets a kick to the chest (although it looks like it hits him in the balls!) for his efforts. Seeing his ultimate victory within reach, Trogg goes for the killing blow; however, it turns out Tails’ swing weakened the rope holding up the bridge. The rope snaps, collapsing the structure, and the two take a plummet. Trogg instinctively grabs the flailing rope and assumes that Tails has perished, only to be stunned when Tails flies to safety. Trogg is then forced to surrender to avoid a plunge into the abyss, much to the elation of the fox people. Luckily, Tails is spared any further awkwardness as the portal back to Mobius begins to fade so he quickly hops back through, his armour magically detaching since it cannot exist outside of the Nameless Zone. Back on Mobius, Sonic praises Tails for staying out of his way but, when questioned, Tails chooses not to reveal what he’s been up to, a plot point that would be revisited in Tails’ subsequent adventures in his home realm.

The Summary:
This was a short and relatively inoffensive side story for Sonic’s oft-bullied sidekick. There’s not much to it and we get only the barest glimpse into Tails’ backstory, which is as far removed from the source material as Sonic’s was in these comics. There was a belief back then that Tails originated from a distant Zone and came to the Emerald Hill Zone after being bullied for his twin tails, mistakenly believing the Zone contained actual emeralds and seeking to make his fortune. While later issues would show some of this, including Tails being bullied, learning he can fly, and his first meeting with Sonic where the hot-headed hero rescued him from drowning in a bog, we get none of it here and very little detail into Tails’ family life or even the nature of the Nameless Zone. It’s a fantasy realm populated exclusively by foxes and under constant threat from the goblins and monsters that lurk in the Land Beyond, with Trogg as the neighbouring realm’s horrific figurehead. While interdimensional and inti-Zone travel had been established in Sonic the Comic by this point, it was always conveyed through traditional means, such as using Starposts or Big Rings. Here, Tails is called from a magical portal, one with a finite lifespan. Indeed, it’s said at the end of the story that Tails risks being trapped there forever if he doesn’t leave right away, making me wonder how he even left in the first place. The story makes it seem like the Enchanter Kings conjure the portal, so perhaps they did this for him back in the day, or maybe the portals just open randomly (or predictably), allowing for brief travel. It’s also not clear if the Nameless Zone is even on Mobius as it appears to be an alternative dimension, not unlike the comic’s depiction of the Special Stages, though one more aesthetically similar to Sonic the Comic’s Golden Axe (Various, 1989 to 2008) adaptations.

Tails’ wish to be seen as a hero is granted, much to his embarrassment.

Indeed, it’s clear that this is a realm of fantasy and magic. The Enchanter Kings charm Tails’ armour and the backgrounds are all very Tolkien-esque in their depictions, to say nothing of the griffin-like Trogg. Of course, the primary humour in this story is the Enchanter King’s belief that Tails is a legendary hero. Thanks to his frequent letters home in which he takes credit not just for Sonic’s heroics but also details how he defeated Doctor Ivo Robotnik, Tails is lauded throughout the Nameless Zone as a near-mythical champion and therefore the only person their monarchs can turn to when Trogg comes calling. Tails’ awkwardness at this hero worship is hilariously British; he repeatedly tries to politely explain the situation, only to be labelled as modest and pushed into battle. It’s a fun juxtaposition as he starts the story desperate to prove himself to his hero and is suddenly thrust into a life-or-death battle he’s not prepared for and met with the kind of adulation normally reserved for Sonic. He’s extremely embarrassed by this, but more because he’s made a rod for his own back with his tall tales and is now forced to face a monstrous opponent who could easily cut him down. Still, despite the situation, Tails doesn’t back down from the fight. He could’ve easily fled or flown away at any time but he chooses to walk onto the bridge, sword in hand, and meet Trogg and give it his all to live up to his reputation and defend his estranged people. Luckily for him, Trogg is overconfident and insolent; he constantly mocks Tails and toys with him, hesitating just long enough to be undone by a frayed rope. Tails’ natural ability to fly ensures his victory and sees Trogg surrender, and he luckily scarpers before people start asking too many questions. The art was colourful and fun, but the story’s too brief to really rate much higher; it’s definitely a weird little side story for Tails and leaves a lot of questions unanswered. However, this would be the first of many returns to the Nameless Zone for the young fox and the start of him living this secret life as a celebrated hero to rival Sonic, a plot thread only a few choice people become aware of.

My Rating:

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Could Be Better

What did you think to Tails’ first solo story in Sonic the Comic? Were you surprised to find he came from a fantasy realm? What did you think to the twist that he’s secretly a hero in his homeland? Would you have liked to see more of his past explored her? What did you think to Trogg and his overconfidence? Which of Tails’ solo stories is your favourite? How are you celebrating Tails and “Sonic 2sday” this year? Whatever your opinion on Tails, or Sonic 2 in general, drop a comment below and go check out my other Sonic content.

Screen Time [Doctor Who Day]: The Day of the Doctor

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On this day, the 23rd of November, in 1963, the longest-running and most successful science-fiction television series ever, Doctor Who, first aired on BBC One in the United Kingdom. Since then, the rogue Time Lord has gone through numerous incarnations and is widely celebrated as one of the most iconic and recognisable mainstream cultural icons in the world.

50th Anniversary Special:
“The Day of the Doctor”

Air Date: 23 November 2013
UK Network: BBC One
Stars: Matt Smith, David Tennant, John Hurt, Jenna Coleman, Jemma Redgrave, Ingrid Oliver, and Billie Piper

The Background:
In 1963, the BBC’s Head of Drama, Sydney Newman, commissioned a show that would appeal to be children and adults alike to fill a gap in the BBC’s schedule, one eventually outlined by writer Cecil Webber. The result was Doctor Who, a long-running science-fiction franchise in which a time travelling alien delighted audiences with historical hijinks, battles against terrifying cybernetic aliens, and emotionally charged morality tales. Save for a hiatus in the 1990s, Doctor Who has been a BBC staple for decades, with various actors stepping into the role thanks to the character’s unique ability to “regenerate” when dying. While debates rage about who is the best Doctor, two names often top the rankings: Tom Baker and David Tennent. After five years as the popular Tenth Doctor, Tennent finally passed the torch to Matt Smith, who won over audiences with his youthful exuberance. However, in the style of his predecessors, Tennent returned to the role for this 50th anniversary, reuniting with co-star Billie Piper (though in a dramatically different role). Tennent and Smith joined legendary actor John Hurt, who readily agreed to join the show and had been previously teased as a forgotten incarnation of the Doctor earlier that year. Accompanied by a short cinema release and two short tie-in episodes, The Day of the Doctor was simultaneously broadcasted in 94 countries to avoid plot leaks and met with critical acclaim. Reviews loved the chemistry between the three Doctors and its celebration of the show’s rich history, though the Zygon sub-plot and the handling of the War Doctor was criticised.

The Plot:
A Zygon plot to destroy London sees the Eleventh (Smith) and Tenth (Tennant) Doctors crossing paths with their former renegade incarnation (Hurt). Together, they reconcile their past by revisiting the last days of the Time War between the Time Lords and the Daleks.

The Review:
The Day of the Doctor takes place during a pretty tumultuous time in the Eleventh Doctor’s life. Most of Matt Smith’s run focused on the Doctor’s ultimate end, a seemingly unavoidable fate that would one day see him buried within his own embiggened TARDIS on the barren wasteland known as Trenzalore. Despite being fully aware of the finality of this inevitability, the Eleventh Doctor continues to be his usual energetic self, a quality I really came to enjoy about Matt Smith’s portrayal and one that juxtaposed his youthful appearance and childlike enthusiasm with a haunted, sombre, aged demeanour at times, both aspects of his personality that are exhibited in this 50th anniversary special. Indeed, the Eleventh Doctor is excited to be heading to the National Gallery with one of his most beautiful and charismatic companions, Clara Oswald (Coleman). He is summoned there by the Unified Intelligence Taskforce (UNIT) and meeting with Kate Lethbridge-Stewart (Redgrave), daughter of the Doctor’s old military correspondent Brigadier Alistair Lethbridge-Stewart (Nicholas Courtney, represented through archival pictures). The Eleventh Doctor relishes his impromptu helicopter ride over London and showing off his status amongst the UNIT personnel to Clara (who, despite having wandered through all of the Doctor’s lives, had no knowledge of his past ties to UNIT). Kate shows the Doctor a mysterious painting he knows all-too-well, a graphical depiction of the last day of the Time War; specifically, the fall of Arcadia and the day the Doctor, in a previous, hitherto unknown incarnation, personally ended the conflict. Since Doctor Who returned in 2005, the mystery of the Time War and the impact it had on the Doctor had been hanging over the show, and his demeanour, like a dark cloud. Burdened by guilt and scarred by the atrocities of war, many of which he perpetrated, the Doctor has effectively been running from his past for years now, but The Day of the Doctor forces him to confront in ways he never imagined.

A middling Zygon invasion proves the catalyst for a cathartic multi-Doctor adventure.

The main plot of the special revolves around, of all things, the Zygons. These monstrous shapeshifters try to conquer the Earth by subduing and replacing key figures in human history. One of their earliest efforts occurs back in 1562, when a Zygon attempted to replace Queen Elizabeth I (Joanna Page). Luckily, Queen Elizabeth was swept up in a whirlwind romance with the Tenth Doctor at the time, though even his cobbled together technology, intuition, and previous experience with the Zygons proves largely incapable of detected the Zygon threat. Time and again, both he and his successor fail to spot who’s a Zygon and who isn’t, leading to the Tenth Doctor putting his foot in it when he accuses the real Queen Elizabeth of being a bad fake. Luckily for him, he’s a dishy time traveller and she’s more amused by his incompetence than annoyed by his accusations. She also proves more capable than he is, fooling the other Zygons with her own impersonation skills (though, to be fair, he was distracted by his other incarnations). In the Eleventh Doctor’s time, the Zygons impersonate Kate and UNIT staff like Petronella Osgood (Oliver) to access the “Black Archive”, a super-secret vault deep within the TARDIS-proofed Tower of London that provides the Zygons with the means to take over London. Of all the threats to bring three incarnations of the Doctor together, the Zygons are disappointingly weak. They’re clunky, awkward creatures and this B-plot merely serves to unite the bickering Doctors and provide them the inspiration for saving their people. The Zygons have been using Time Lord technology to freeze themselves in paintings and covertly invade other worlds, technology that the Doctors use to briefly revisit the Time War and to travel back to the present day to force the humans and Zygons into an amicable truce rather than mutual destruction. They’re not a very compelling enemy (the Sontarans would’ve been much better), though they are defeated in an interesting way (the Doctors force both groups to temporarily forget which species they are). Naturally, the Daleks do appear, but merely as a cameo and purely in sequences depicting the chaotic Time War, where their power was at their mightiest and their thirst of victory was matched by the Time Lords.

The forgotten War Doctor sees how his decisions will shape the men he will become.

The Day of the Doctor firmly explains that, during the Time War, the Doctor took on a new face and forsook his name and title. Dubbed “The War Doctor”, this new incarnation fought a ruthless battle against his mortal foe for untold generations. The very nature of the Time War meant it existed in perpetuity, with victories, loss, deaths, and resurrections all happening at once. Finally, after an age of nonstop violence, the War Doctor decided he had had enough. Now aged to an old, battle-weary warrior, he took it upon himself to end the bloody conflict the only way he knew how. Thus, he broke into Gallifrey’s weapons facility and stole a doomsday weapon so destructive even their military General (Ken Bones) was afraid of it. A strangely archaic cube of cogs, the “Moment” can wipe out entire universes and is powered by a sentient artificial intelligence. Taking the form of a figure it knows is (or will be) important to the Doctor, the “Bad Wolf” (Piper), it questions the War Doctor’s motivation and, in a bid to show him what wiping out every single man, woman, child, and Dalek, will do to him, conjures a time vortex to show him his future selves. Honestly, I was never a fan of the War Doctor concept; I would’ve much preferred Paul McGann or Christopher Eccleston returned to portray this role rather than retroactively bump up the Doctor’s incarnations. However, you can’t go wrong with John Hurt and he portrays this forgotten, reviled incarnation with gusto. Despite being beaten down by war and technically being younger than his counterparts, the War Doctor is a cantankerous, grandfatherly figure who initially admonishes his successors’ buffoonery. He’s stunned that they don’t seem to take anything seriously or treat their equipment with respect and, much like the First Doctor (William Hartnell) in the first multi-Doctor special, is portrayed as the more authoritarian and sensible of the three despite being at least 400 years younger than them.

The Tenth and Eleventh Doctors are forced to confront, and embrace, their violent past.

The Tenth and Eleventh Doctor are horrified to see their renegade incarnation, treating him as a dangerous, almost bogeyman-like figure from their past that they’ve buried deep at the back of their minds. Prompted by the Moment, the War Doctor asks pertinent questions to understand how committing genocide will affect him and learns that the Tenth Doctor was haunted by the decision and the Eleventh has tried to move on and forget about it. The Tenth is outraged at such a suggestion, stunned to find his future self has gotten over the worst decision they ever made, but it’s clear that the Tenth Doctor is still tormented by his past and simply trying to find a productive way forward. While they take an instant dislike to each other (the Tenth Doctor hates his successor’s new TARDIS interior, as is tradition), the Tenth and the Eleventh Doctor have a lot in common. Both favour spectacles, suits, and being more flamboyant with their sonic screwdrivers, eschewing the War Doctor’s more practical and scientific approach for a dramatic flair. The Eleventh Doctor is largely critical of his predecessor’s more theatrical approach, especially his way with women, while the Tenth Doctor criticises his successor’s dress sense (particularly the fez). The two bicker here and there but mostly engage in a game of one-upmanship, comparing their sonic screwdrivers and competing to see who can solve problems faster, with both being trumped by the War Doctor’s more measured approach. Hardened by their past experiences and desperate to keep Kate from making the same mistakes, the two intervene to reach a more amicable solution and the War Doctor sees that his decision, while horrendous, will save countless lives since his future incarnations try to atone for their past. Their adventure together sees the Tenth and Eleventh Doctor embrace their forgotten counterpart and, in a bid to help the War Doctor face his decision, they willingly join him in activating the machine, only for Clara’s distraught reaction to show them they can come up with a better solution.

The Doctors’ desperate plan sees Gallifrey saved and their pain eased as a result.

Inspired by their solution to have their sonic screwdrivers calculate a formula to vaporise a door (a plan amusingly foiled when Clara reveals their cell was never locked!), the Doctors use their TARDISes to collude with all twelve thirteen of their other incarnations to utilise the Zygon picture-hopping technique and shift Gallifrey to, essentially, a pocket dimension, destroying the Daleks in the process. While the General initially resists since it would mean the Time Lords are trapped in another dimension, he relents since it means the survival of their race and the Thirteen Doctors co-ordinate their TARDISes to execute the plan, sparing Gallifrey and undoing the Doctor’s darkest moment. Unfortunately, due to the unstable timelines, none of the three will remember this and the War Doctor resigns himself to having to live thinking he committed genocide, knowing he’s earned his title once more and that he’ll be succeeded by such fine men and welcoming his regeneration into the Ninth Doctor (Christopher Eccleston). The Tenth Doctor also urges the Eleventh Doctor to find a solution to their impending demise at Trenzalore, reasoning that their actions in this adventure prove they can always find some way out. Left to ruminate over the depiction of Gallifrey’s last stand, the Eleventh Doctor is visited by a strangely familiar curator (Tom Baker), who hints both that he’s a future incarnation and that the Doctor’s next journey will see him trying to recover his lost people. Of course, The Day of the Doctor was also accompanied by two short tie-ins. While “The Last Day” (Stone, 2013) isn’t that great and weirdly depicts a first-person account of the Daleks’ invasion of Arcadia, “The Night of the Doctor” (Hayes, 2013) saw the long-awaited return of perhaps the most underappreciated Doctor, the Eighth (Paul McGann), and showed how he regenerated into the War Doctor. After failing to save a doomed pilot since the Time Lords are as reviled as the Daleks, the Eighth Doctor is offered a chance to regenerate into a warrior by Ohila (Clare Higgins) of the Sisterhood of Karn, forsaking his name and passive ways in favour of a new form more fitting for a violent war.

The Summary:
As you’d expect from a 50th anniversary special, The Day of the Doctor contains a fair few Easter Eggs and references for long-time series fans. The opening, for example, is basically a shot-for-shot remake of the first-ever episode, An Unearthly Child (Hussein, 1963); Clara teaches at Coal Hill School; the Tenth Doctor echoes the Second Doctor (Patrick Troughton) with his “I don’t like it line”, and the General echoes the Brigadier when multiple Doctors show up. The Black Vault is full of gadgets and callbacks to previous adventures, including photos of previous companions and incidents, and much of the special refers back to the Tenth Doctor’s era. Perhaps the most exciting inclusion was the brief appearance of Peter Capaldi as the upcoming Twelfth Doctor, which was a fun tease that hadn’t been done before. All the Doctors (at that point in time, anyway) cameo in the finale thanks to archival footage and some rather disconcerting digital stand-ins, but it’s Tom Baker’s heartwarming reappearance as a possible future incarnation that steals the show at the end. Honestly, I’m surprised by the restraint, really. There could’ve been loads more lore and cameos and references stuffed in here but, instead, The Day of the Doctor wisely focuses on exploring this unknown chapter of the Doctor’s life and tying into what viewers saw with the Tenth and were currently experiencing with the Eleventh. The special is thus a story of grief, mourning, and dealing with difficult decisions. The Tenth and the Eleventh Doctor are haunted by their actions and the War Doctor is hesitant to activate the Moment but comes to see that the deaths of billions will safeguard innumerable other lives. The relief he feels when his counterparts suggest a wild, outrageous third option is palpable and all three get a sense of catharsis from undoing this one heinous act that scarred them for so many years.

A forgotten era of the Doctor’s life is explored and his character examined in new ways.

While I’m no fan of Billy Piper and never liked her portrayal of Rose Tyler, it was nice to see her here as the Moment, an advisory, sentient AI only the War Doctor can see and hear. Through her, he meets his successors and sees that, while his actions will be traumatic for him, he’ll eventually grow beyond it and also put his lives to good use saving others as recompense. I’m not sure where the Tenth Doctor is being pulled from in his time stream but he’s a little more haggard and broken than what we usually see. He’s still cracking wise and masking his pain behind a bombastic façade, but it’s clear he’s being written to still be very raw over his actions in the Time War. In comparison, the Eleventh Doctor is just as haunted but has found more productive ways to cope. He attacks life with a youthful exuberance and delights in every adventure, determined to help whenever he can so that his dreadful actions can have some positive meaning in the universe. This makes Clara’s intervention when the three prepare to activate the Moment all the more poignant, since she never pictured “her” Doctor’s face as being responsible for so many deaths. Her presence has a positive impact on the War Doctor, too. It’s clear he hasn’t had a companion for some time and is struggling with the blood on his hands and the path that lies before him, but I enjoyed how he was this gruff old man who whipped his younger/older selves into shape. Again, I still would’ve preferred seeing the Eighth or Ninth incarnation fulfil this role just to make things less messy but the mystery surrounding the War Doctor is intriguing and I like how his counterparts are equal parts ashamed, afraid, and disgusted by him. Yet, in spending time with him and finally confronting this dark and oppressed part of their lives, they come to accept that the War Doctor was and still is a part of them and acknowledge him as a necessary evil in their long lives.

Cameos, references, and a heartfelt celebration of the series make for an enjoyable special.

The War Doctor, in turn, comes to feel vindicated and accepted for the first time in ages. Having forsaken his name and pacifist values and committed himself to war for so long, the pride he feels in being known as the Doctor once more shines through and allows him to regenerate with dignity rather than in infamy. While the Zygon subplot isn’t all that interesting and largely detracts from these more interesting narrative beats, I did like how it brought the three together. I just wonder if, maybe, looping in some kind of Dalek plot wouldn’t have been better. Like, maybe Davros (Julian Bleach) or an Emperor Dalek could’ve used the magic picture technology to escape the Time War and threaten to unravel it, spilling it into the universe once more. Sure, we wouldn’t have had the doppelgänger plot or the creative resolution to the Zygon invasion, but it might’ve been more visually and thematically interesting for the three Doctors to team up against their mortal enemy in a more explicit way for the 50th anniversary special. Still, the main selling point here is the exploration of the Time War and the War Doctor’s part in it and delving into how badly his violent actions affected him over the years. This was a constant and recurring thread in the revival series (and even cropped up in later years, especially after Gallifrey was wiped out once again!) and formed a central part of the Doctor’s character from 2005. The Day of the Doctor aims to bring him some catharsis, sewing the seeds in the Tenth Doctor to move past his actions ahead of regenerating into the Eleventh and, in this regard, it succeeds admirably. Throw in some fun cameos, entertaining interactions between the three incarnations, and a solid, emotional narrative core and you have an extremely enjoyable celebration of the long-running franchise.

My Rating:

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Great Stuff

What did you think to The Day of the Doctor? Are you a fan of multi-Doctor adventures or do you find that they’re confusing and lacklustre affairs? Is the Tenth Doctor one of your favourites? What did you think to his interactions with his counterparts? Were you disappointed that a new, unknown incarnation was created, or did you enjoy seeing John Hurt take on the role? Would you like to see more multi-Doctor adventures featuring the modern cast? How are you celebrating Doctor Who Day today? Let me know your thoughts on Doctor Who and its 50th anniversary special down in the comments and go check out my other Doctor Who reviews.

Wrestling Recap [Undervember]: Undertaker vs. Orton (WrestleMania 21)

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After debuting as part of the “Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase’s Million Dollar Team at the 1990 Survivor Series, the Undertaker became a force of nature within World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE). To celebrate the Deadman’s illustrious career, I’m looking back at his WrestleMania matches against the future members of the super-stable Evolution.

The Date: 3 April 2005
The Venue: Staples Center; Los Angeles, California
The Commentary: Michael Cole and Tazz
The Referee: Earl Hebner
The Stakes: Legend vs. Legend Killer, singles match with the Undertaker’s WrestleMania winning streak on the line

The Build-Up:
Over his long and legendary career, the Undertaker became force of nature within the World Wrestling Federation (WWF), amassing an impressive list of rivalries with some of wrestling’s most talented, and notorious, names in his near-mythical wrestling career. If that wasn’t enough, the Undertaker boasted the greatest winning streak in wrestling history by racking up 21 WrestleMania wins between 1991 and 2013. By WrestleMania 21, Evolution had broken up following their heavy Batista turning against his egomaniacal leader, a move that worked out far better for Batista than his former Evolution stablemate Randy Orton, who floundered in his first run as World Heavyweight Champion. Legal issues also saw the WWF rebranded to WWE and the company attempted to balance its bloated roster with a brand split that restricted certain competitors and championships to either Raw or SmackDown! On Raw, Evolution reigned supreme; Triple H had enlisted Randy Orton, Batista, and the “Nature Boy” Ric Flair in defending his World Heavyweight Championship. However, after Orton had made a name for himself as a “Legend Killer” and dared to get ideas above his station by doing what Triple H couldn’t and dethroning Chris Benoit for the World Heavyweight Championship at the 2004 SummerSlam, Orton was unceremoniously kicked out of the group and spent the rest of the year struggling to get over as a babyface in matches against his former teammates. In early 2005, Orton was inspired by the legendary “Superstar” Billy Graham to attack his on-screen girlfriend, Stacy Keibler, reverting to his devious Legend Killer persona and attacking the likes of Jake “The Snake” Roberts to goad the Deadman into accepting an interpromotional match. Unfazed by the Undertaker’s mind games, Orton became the first true challenger of the Deadman’s unprecedented WrestleMania winning streak by directly referencing the Streak and his intentions to break it. Orton went into WrestleMania 21 with a great deal of confidence and momentum thanks to hitting his finishing move, the RKO, on the Deadman and even colluding with his father, “Cowboy” Bob Orton, to get one up on the Phenom.

The Match:
Unlike many people, I’m one of the few that actually enjoyed the Undertaker’s turn as the motorcycle-riding, leather trenchcoat-wearing “American Bad Ass”. It helps that this persona debuted at the peak of when I was really getting into wrestling and was my first real exposure to the character outside of the videogames, but I do feel this run was under-rated as it gave the Undertaker a chance to adapt to the times and show more of his personality. However, as a big fan of the ongoing Undertaker/Kane storyline, I was super excited after Kane helped WWE Chairman Vince McMahon defeat and bury the Undertaker alive at the 2003 Survivor Series. Anyone who knows anything about the Undertaker knew that this was leading to a return to his classic Deadman character and it was surprising how enjoyable it was seeing him torment Kane with spooky shenanigans before reverting to a version of his undead persona at WrestleMania XX. Drafted to SmackDown! during the first brand split, the Undertaker was touted as a special attraction and his supernatural powers were often framed as “mind games” to intimidate opponents. Thus, the best way for someone to prove their mettle against the Undertaker was to not show fear or intimidation, and Orton certainly excelled with that. Growing from a forgettable jobber to an arrogant asshole, Orton had made a name for himself taking out legends and running with Evolution, and arguably his feud with the Undertaker finally got his career back on track after his disastrous run as a fan favourite World Champion. After making a chilling impression with one of his trademark entrances (that included not just torch-baring druids but also the Undertaker gliding to the ring through a spooky mist), the match kicked off with Orton staying out of the Deadman’s reach and using his speed to avoid a few shots. Orton even snuck in a slap to the face for good measure to play a few mind games of his own!

Randy Orton’s arrogance and youth were nothing in the face of the Undertaker’s tenacity.

Although a lock-up attempt didn’t go well for the young upstart, Orton did use his speed and agility to land a dropkick off an Irish whip to score a one fall and even a back body drop. However, Orton went through the sequence once too often and paid the price courtesy of a big punch from the Undertaker. The Undertaker tried to slow the pace by methodically beating Orton in the corner. A charge to his young opponent saw the Deadman caught in a roll up for a two count, but the Undertaker dumped Orton to the outside when the youngster went for his signature RKO. Dictating the pace of the match, the Undertaker landed his patented leg drop across the ring apron and then successfully (if awkwardly) hit his “Old School” rope walk strike to the delight of the fans. However, the corner again proved to be the Deadman’s undoing as he ended up crotched on the top rope and smacked off the barricade off a dropkick to the outside after Orton dodged a big boot. The cocky Legend Killer delivered a few strikes on the outside and then promptly returned the action to the ring and scored another two count off an explosive clothesline. The Undertaker answered back with a running DDT and a sidewalk slam for a couple of his own near falls. A few running splashes in the corner wore Orton down but the Legend Killer shrugged off the Snake Eyes and sent the Undertaker crashing to the mat with a back elbow for a two count. Orton then continued the pressure with some vicious strikes to the Undertaker’s head and chest, but his bravado finally turned to fear when the Undertaker did his trademark zombie sit up. This led the former World Champion to trade strikes with the Deadman before being clumsily being clobbered with an elbow/clothesline attempt from the Undertaker.

Despite some close near falls, the Undertaker dispatched his upstart challenger without much issue.

The Undertaker then slapped on the Dragon Sleeper to further punish the upstart, but Orton stayed conscious and even hit a desperation DDT for a close two count before locking in one of his most infamous moves, the goddamn rear-naked choke. Indeed, one of the many complaints I have about Orton is that his in-ring repertoire is so limited, and he needlessly drags out matches with rest holds. To be fair the Undertaker did look a little gassed so maybe they both needed the breather, but the crowd was not happy to see things grind to a halt once Orton applied the sleeper. Luckily, the rest holds didn’t last long as the Undertaker hit a back suplex counter and kicked Orton in the face, and the Legend Killer sucked the crowd back in after hitting a big powerslam for another near fall. Orton’s arrogance almost cost him as he posed during the ten punches in the corner and risked being planted with a massive Last Ride. The youth slipped out of it and even crashed into the referee so that Bob Orton could clock the Undertaker with his signature cast! Luckily, the referee was a little too groggy and the Undertaker was a little too persistent and the Deadman kicked out, sat up, and promptly booted the Cowboy off the ring apron in retaliation. The crowd came unglued when the Undertaker hoisted Orton up for a Chokeslam but damn near hit the roof when Orton countered it into an RKO outta nowhere! If there was ever a perfect time to end the Streak, that was arguably it but, unbelievably, the Undertaker kicked out. Frustrated, Orton made the rookie mistake of attempting to hit the Deadman with his own finisher, the Tombstone Piledriver. Naturally, the Undertaker reversed this, hit a Tombstone of his own, and pinned Orton to extend the Streak to 13-0. As much as I think, in hindsight, that Orton probably should’ve won this match to cement him as the true Legend Killer, it’s hard to say that this match really deserved such a moment. It was a bit middling and their styles didn’t really mesh well as the Undertaker is all about a slow, methodical, power-based game and Orton is…well, a bit dull and safe. I think it would’ve been smarter to have the match focus on Orton outsmarting the Deadman (which was there, but not could’ve just been played up more) and trying to hit the RKO at every turn while the Undertaker got more and more frustrated before decimating Orton with a Tombstone, but it was an okay match, despite its flaws.

The Aftermath:
Apparently, Randy Orton refused to be the man to break the Undertaker’s legendary streak, a decision that I do think was a mistake as Orton really could’ve made a name for himself with that accolade and maybe the Undertaker would’ve felt less pressure to push himself to the limit in his later years. However, since Randy Orton came within a gnat’s wing of breaking the Undertaker’s winning streak, this was far from the last match between these two. Although a brief hiatus and an injury kept both men out of the ring for a few months, they rekindled their rivalry after Orton was officially drafted to SmackDown! later that year. The two faced off in a WrestleMania rematch at the 2005 SummerSlam and, this time, Bob Orton’s interference and the RKO took out the Deadman. The father/son duo not only defeated the Undertaker a few months later at No Mercy, they also locked him in a casket, set it on fire, and chopped at it with axes! The Undertaker made a dramatic return at the conclusion of the 2005 Survivor Series and his feud with Orton culminated in a brutal Hell in a Cell match at Armageddon, which saw the Deadman emerge victorious. By the time WrestleMania 22 rolled around, the two had parted ways. The Undertaker moved into a feud with Mark Henry, Randy Orton took part in a triple threat match for the World Hevayweight Championship, and the two never had another program together as they simply faced off in a series of tag team matches between 2007 and 2009.

My Rating:

Rating: 2 out of 5.

Could Be Better

What did you think to the Legend vs. Legend Killer match between the Undertaker and Randy Orton at WrestleMania 22? How would you rate it against the Undertaker’s other WrestleMania matches? Did you think Orton was going to win after his father interfered or after hitting that RKO? Do you think the Streak should have ended here, or at all? How are you celebrating the Undertaker’s debut this year, what are some of your favourite matches and moments from his long and distinguished career, and what dream match would you have liked to see him involved in? Whatever your thoughts, drop a comment below and be sure to check out my other wrestling content across the site.