Dr. K's Waiting Room

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Long considered an unlucky day due to superstitions involving the number thirteen and religious connotations, Friday the 13^th is equally well-known as a long-running series of slasher movies. As a result, this is clearly the best opportunity to take a look at the Friday the 13^th (Various, 1980 to 2009) horror series and to commemorate this unlucky and dreaded date.

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Quick Facts:
The sequel to fan favourite entry Friday the 13^th Part VII: The New Blood (Buechler, 1988), Jason Takes Manhattan was originally conceived to return Lar Park Lincoln to the franchise before director Rob Hedden pushed to get series killer Jason Voorhees (Kane Hodder) out of his comfort zone. Budgetary concerns scuppered Hedden’s ambitious ideas and forced him to film mostly in Vancouver, meaning the film failed to deliver on its title and is largely seen as one of the worst in the franchise.

The Review:
After being trapped beneath Crystal Lake at the end of The New Blood, undead maniac Jason Voorhees has again passed into legend, spoken of as a bogeyman to locals like Jim Miller (Todd Shaffer) and Suzy Donaldson (Tiffany Paulsen). As the high school seniors canoodle on a small yacht on the clearly freezing cold lake, they have no idea that Jason’s rotting corpse is trapped below. After giving Suzy a scare with a heavily truncated version of Jason’s backstory and donning an incredibly faithful replica of the killer’s mask, Jim nonchalantly drops anchor, snagging an underwater power line and resurrected Jason through the power of electricity. Pissed after having his nap disturbed, Jason climbs aboard and slaughters the two, disconnecting the anchor and accidentally drifting away from Crystal Lake and to the Big Apple! Oh no, wait, that doesn’t happen as that would actually make sense and deliver on the title! Instead, Jason sneaks onto the nearby SS Lazarus, a steamship chartered to take Jim and Suzy’s fellow graduates to New York City. Unseen by all except a crazed deck hand (Alex Diakun), whose warnings naturally go unheeded, Jason picks off a new batch of unsuspecting and largely horny twenty-somethings teenagers. While the ship is populated by colourful, if painfully one-dimensional characters, our main protagonist and ultimate “Final Girl” is Rennie Wickham (Jensen Daggett), a somewhat withdrawn and quiet girl with a crippling fear of water. After losing her parents as a child, Rennie was raised by her uncle, Doctor Charles McCulloch (Peter Mark Richman), an uptight and demanding authoritarian who doubles as the school’s Biology teacher and is aghast when Rennie’s English teacher, Colleen Van Deusen (Barbara Bingham), encourages Rennie to make the trip to face her fears alongside her dog, Toby (Ace).

Charles is extremely overprotective of Rennie, aggressively dismissing Sean Robertson (Scott Reeves) from pursuing Rennie and shielding her at all times, often to Rennie’s detriment. Charles is so focused on laying down the law he completely misses that Rennie has a psychic connection to Jason, whom Chrles regards as a long dead superstition. It’s later revealed that young Rennie (Amber Pawlick) had a particularly harrowing experience when her uncle pushed her into Crystal Lake to force her to learn how to swim. Scared by her uncle’s warnings that young Jason (Tim Mirkovich) would drag her under, young Rennie encountered (or possibly imagined) the mongoloid grabbing her leg, leaving her deathly afraid of water and haunted by visions of the drowning Jason begging for help. This aspect isn’t explored much and seems to be a manifestation of Rennie’s fear of water rather than a true connection to Jason. It’s a bit of a shame as it might’ve been a nice twist for Jason to pursue Rennie either to silence the voices in his head or to finish the job he started as a boy, though this latter idea is equally perplexing as Jason was never trapped in the lake as a child so I assume the lake is haunted by his spirit? It’s quite muddy and open to interpretation, but also barely utilised, which is a shame as Rennie could’ve used the character development. Sean is similarly uncharismatic, simply being a handsome young man to protect and worry about Rennie. He gets some wrinkles thanks to the pressure put upon him by his father, Admiral John Robertson (Warren Munson), which sees Sean reject his father’s expectations and then unconvincingly try to maintain order once Jason’s rampage is discovered. I quite liked the close relationship Rennie shared with Coleen, who encourages her passion for writing and stands up to Charles, but none of these aspects are as entertaining or as interesting as they could be as they’re just window-dressing to the carnage.

Unsurprisingly, the kids aboard the SS Lazarus are largely there to look good and die in creative (if severely butchered) ways. There are some clichés, of course, such as bitchy Tamara Mason (Sharlene Martin), who uses film nerd Wayne Webber (Martin Cummins) to blackmail Charles, purposely shoves Rennie overboard out of spite, and flaunts her sexuality in front of any good-looking guy she sees. Tamara is joined by Eva Watanabe (Kelly Hu), who initially tries to emulate her but cuts ties with her after the Rennie incident but doesn’t really do anything else. They perv on boxers Jason Newston (David Jacox) and standout character Julius Gaw (V.C. Dupree), whose whole thing is…well, boxing. Yet, Julius stands out as he defies Charles’s attempts to take control when the bodies pile up, grabs a shotgun to chase Jason, and is eager to confront two street punks (Sam Sarkar and Michael Benyaer) when they abduct Rennie in New York. Julius has far more charisma than bland-ass Sean, stealing every scene with his easy-going, snarky attitude and even daring to go one-on-one with Jason, despite being outmatched. Jason’s victims are rounded out by rocker J.J. Jarrett (Saffron Henderson), who could’ve been a cool, colourful addition but is instead reduced to being his incredibly underdeveloped first victim, and a bunch of forgettable, interchangeable students and ship workers who are either taken out by Jason or left to drown when he scuppers the Lazarus. It’s crazy that the film not only drops the ball on its title but also does nothing interesting with a boat full of horny, drunken, stoned students. We barely see them interacting in a social setting, there is no sex and barely any sexual activity between them beyond Tamara’s unsuccessful seduction of Charles, and all we ever see them do is wander the ship or react to whatever new problem Jason’s caused.

By this point, this is largely to be expected as Jason was the established star by this eighth movie. There’s no sense of dread or suspense to Jason as we clearly see him enter scenes or follow him as he stalks his prey with a hulking menace, sadly all while sporting an obvious visual downgrade from the last film. Depicted as strangely white and constantly wet and slimy, Jason sloshes his way though the ship seemingly at random, bashing J.J.’s head in with her guitar, thrusting a steaming hot sauna rock into Jason’s stomach, slitting Admiral Robertson’s throat (and leaving him propped up against the wheel for Sean to find), and stabbing Tamara with a mirror shard. Very few of these deaths are shown, of course, leaving us with a glimpse of the bloody aftermath. Much of Jason’s terror relies on jump scares as he now blatantly teleports from scene to scene to ambush his victims or get ahead of them, even when clearly seen to be some distance away seconds before. This ability is kind of fun and speaks to Jason’s unstoppable nature, but also inconsistent as he choses to pursue Rennie and Sean through New York rather than simply teleporting ahead. There are some interesting changes to Jason’s character, though, such as his legend evolving into a warning for inexperience swimmers and him apparently being both a physical force and a grotesque apparition that lurks under Crystal Lake and haunts Rennie. This child-like form constantly changes in every appearance, becoming more monstrous as the film goes on, and is always begging for help, tying into Jason as a tragic horror villain. However, this plot thread goes nowhere and means nothing. There’s no sense that Jason is trying to reunite with or destroy his boyish spirit, or that his child self is trying to help Rennie. Her psychic connection to Jason seems to lure him to her and even has him accidentally saving her from being raped, but that’s about it, making it a bizarre inclusion.

Indeed, we’re almost encouraged to celebrate Jason’s actions, especially once the survivors reach Vancouver New York and it’s revealed just how much of a bastard Charles is. Sure, it’s sad to see Jason smash Julius’s head off and how casually he throttles Eva and shockingly (pun intended) seeing him toss Wayne’s body into the ship’s electricals, but he also murders the gang bangers who dose Rennie with…something (I assume it’s heroin?) and threaten to rape her. It takes a good hour or so for Jason to reach New York, and then another ten to fifteen minutes for him to escape the dingy docks and back alleys and stalk through Times Square. These were some great shots and it’s fun seeing Jason walk the streets, smash through a diner, and ride the subway all while barely attracting a glance from the disinterested New Yorkers. Sadly, as many have stated, Jason doesn’t “take” Manhattan in the slightest and is barely seen in the iconic city as the film spends more time pissing away the boat premise and having the survivors flee through alleys and sewers. Desperate to escape Jason, Rennie and Sean head into the surprisingly spacious sewer tunnels, only to learn that they flood with toxic waste every midnight (because…of course they do!) Since Jason decides not to employ his teleporting powers, this leads to a somewhat tense chase and a somewhat horrifying moment when Rennie tosses toxic waste into Jason’s face and leaves him a mewling, semi-skeletal wreck that’s somehow his worst unmasked appearance. As Sean and Rennie struggle with a sewer grate, Jason staggers after them, only to be swamped by the toxic waste, him somehow spewing up vile liquid and crying for his mother as he’s hit. The toxic waste melts Jason and washes his remains away, leaving Rennie with a vision of his unconscious child form to symbolise her overcoming her fears (I guess?) Rennie and Sean then reunite with Toby and are left wandering New York, apparently having defeated Jason in the most mediocre way possible.

Final Thoughts:
Fun fact: This was the second Friday the 13^th film I ever saw, after Friday the 13^th Part VI: Jason Lives (McLoughlin, 1986), so I’ve always had a touch of nostalgia for it. However, even I cannot defend this one. The franchise had well and truly run out of steam and ideas by this point and that’s reflected in the desperate decision to try something new. Ironically, placing Jason on a ship or in a big city could’ve been really good ideas if the film had committed to them and done them in interesting ways. I almost understand how restrictive it would be having Jason wander around New York without much purpose but promising that and then confining him to a boat was a ridiculous decision. The main portion of the film might’ve been fun if they boat had been livelier, full of sex and drink and over the top characters doing horny teenage things, all while Charles scowls in the background and Jason brutalises the kids one by one. Instead, the setting is as wasted as the city scenes, which are so obviously not in New York that it makes you wonder why the filmmakers bothered. It’s such a shame as there are some good ideas here, such as Jason’s legend having different layers, Rennie’s connection to him, and the suggestion that there’s some kind of bond between them. However, none of that is developed in a meaningful way so it feels like a waste of time, especially as Rennie is such a boring character despite her past trauma. While Kane Hodder physically embodies the role like no other, Jason looks awful here, especially when unmasked, and the kills are completely forgettable save for Julius having his head knocked off. I imagine even die-hard Friday the 13^th fans struggle to defend this one, which is such a let-down in every sense of the word that you’re better off skipping it and watching any of the previous entries instead.

My Rating:

Terrible

Do you agree that Friday the 13^th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan is one of the worst in the franchise? If you consider it a guilty pleasure…why? Were you disappointed that Rennie’s past/psychic connection with Jason wasn’t explored more? Which of kills was your favourite and what did you think to Jason’s demise? How annoyed were you to find that Jason barely spends any time in New York? Which Friday the 13^th film are you watching today? Use the comments below to tell me what you thought of Jason Takes Manhattan, support me on Ko-Fi, and check out my other horror content.