This Week In Wrestling

ThisWeekInWrestling

Raw

So former Tough Enough contestant Matt Cappotelli died recently but the WWE doesn’t want to acknowledge that or care enough to mention it. Instead, we get THE BIG DAWG~!!, who opens the show simply to say that he doesn’t like Bobby Lashley and wants to fight him. And I don’t mean it’s a simple statement; I mean Roman is simple. Anyways, newly crowned Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler and the man who should be the Intercontinental Champion, Drew McIntyre, decide to take umbrage with Raw’s biggest loser, which ends in a brawl that Seth Rollins joins in on.

Bray Wyatt was apparently in a car accident, due to his own carelessness as I understand it, so Matt Hardy takes on Curtis Axel alone this week in a rematch from last week. Unlike last week, this was less of a simple, fluke win for Axel and was the exact opposite; a fun but unnecessarily long affair that saw Axel get another win over Hardy after Bo Dallas distracted the Woken Warrior. I mean, come on, I’m not Matt’s biggest fan but even his staunchest followers and supporters have to be disappointed to see former World Champion Matt Hardy lose back-to-back matches to Curtis-fuckin’-Axel.

The Authors of Pain are officially back on Raw, re-establishing that they’re a thing by taking a win over Titus Worldwide. Given what a piss-poor job the WWE have done with the Ascension and the Revival, I fully expect the Authors of Pain to meander around the lower fringes of the tag team division for about a year or so before they’re randomly pushed like we should give a shit.

Following on from the opening brawl, Ziggler and McIntyre take on Reigns and Rollins a bit of a tag team match. This was actually gearing up to be a massively fun and competitive match; as I said last week, Ziggler seems to have found his groove now that he’s working with Rollins and Reigns is always better when he’s partnered up with his Shield buddies. We’ll never know how this match would have gone, though, as the Revival interfered and attacked Reigns just as Rollins looked to have the match won. After the match, all the heels beat the crap out of Rollins and Reigns to help make them look as strong as possible ahead of Roman’s next massive superhuman effort.

Big Cass is apparently back on Raw and calling himself “Constable Baron Corbin” as Corbin takes to the ring to initiate exactly the same big man/little man feud we saw between Cass and Daniel Bryan on SmackDown! Live, only with Finn Balor! Afterwards, Ember Moon and Liv Morgan had a bit of a match, which saw Ember take the win following her impressive (if overly choreographed) Eclipse.

Just in case you thought we’d seen enough of Roman Reigns, and to continue the absolutely hard-on the WWE has for tag team matches (but not, I should add, the tag team division), he comes back out to team with Lashley against the Revival. This time around, because there’s so much pride and tension between Reigns and Lashley, Reigns refuses to tag in Bobby and ends up getting his ass kicked so badly that the match is thrown out with a disqualification finish. That was…weird, but classic Reigns; one thing you can say about him is that he does get the piss beaten out of him a lot!

IronicMojo Rawley and No Way Jose still don’t manage to get into an actual wrestling match as Mojo instead attacks his conga line again and everything degenerates into a brawl. After that, Nia Jax challenges Alexa Bliss to an extreme rules match at Extreme Rules…and ends up in a match against Mickie James, which Nia wins with minimal effort. Anyway, following on from a load of backstage shenanigans and recent weeks, Braun Strowman and Kevin Owens attempt to have a match in the main event. In less than a minute, Owens runs away like a cowards and gets counted out, so Strowman chases him down, locks him in a God-damn port-a-potty, and tosses him off the main stage. In case you’re wondering: no, he was not covered in faeces, just that weird blue liquid. Remember when Kevin Owens was the Universal Champion?

PepperidgeFarm

SmackDownLive

Team Hell No is back and in the ring and on the mic and talking! Kane and Daniel Bryan have quite the amusing airing of their grievances; Kane is all for burying the hatchet and putting their more tumultuous past behind them but Bryan is still a bit shirty because Kane tried to end his career, kidnap his wife, and, y’know, kill him. Kane’s all like, “c’mon, dude” but the Uso interrupt to question they’re status as number one contenders. They propose a tag team match where, if the Usos win, they’ll be added to the Extreme Rules match.

Jeff Hardy puts the United States Championship on the line against the Miz, who answered the open challenge. Surprisingly enough, Jeff retained here; given that Shinsuke Nakamura is out from a dog bite injury and I heard that Jeff is working injured, I half-expected to see Miz steal the belt away and continue his seemingly never-ending stranglehold over the WWE’s mid-card titles but, instead, Mi falls to the Swanton Bomb.

The first televised intergender singles match in God-knows how long happens next as Asuka takes on James Ellsworth. Of course, it’s not really a match because we simply cannot see a man (even a dweeb like Ellsworth) fit a woman, not in today’s world. Instead, Asuka kicks him a bit and he runs away; Asuka chases him backstage, gets counted out, and then gets attacked by Carmella.

AJ Styles and Rusev have a bit of a face off to hype up their Extreme Rules match; to further this agenda, Styles goes one-on-one with Aiden English. Despite some distractions from Rusev, Styles thankfully gets the win with the Calf Crusher; however, after the match, all the handshakes are forgotten as Rusev attacks Styles and locks him into the Accolade.

Becky Lynch got a nice little win over Peyton Royce, though it still feels as though she’s just spinning her wheels, before Team Hell No take on the Usos in the main event. Despite having not teamed together for ages and all their issues, Bryan and Kane were too much for the mighty Usos, who lost pretty handily. Afterwards, the Bludgeon Brothers popped out for a bit of a stare down but in now way to I expect them to be dropping the belts any time soon.

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